01
True heart cannot be exchanged for true heart, which is very normal, because everyone has different standards, understandings, categories, presets, and degrees of true heart. In the case of a certain behavior, you think that you have done your best to the extent of sincerity, but in the eyes of the other party, it is far from meeting her presupposition of sincerity.
For example, if you have 10 yuan, you are willing to give her 5 yuan and leave 5 yuan for your own life, but her default on sincerity is 7 yuan, which may also be moved, but she may not necessarily recognize your sincerity.
In fact, people are also like this, otherwise how can it be said that human nature is selfish and greedy, and if you pay seven points to others, you must be sincere, and in turn, the sincerity of others requires ten points.
It may also be that you have paid ten points, but the "ten" standards of each other are not the same, so your ten points are only seven points in the eyes of the other party.
After all, sincerity needs to be proved by actual actions and actions, if you have a very good intention, the result is only the ability to prove the seven points of mind, so your very good intention will fall into the eyes of the other party will be greatly reduced.
It can be seen from this that to impress a person with sincerity, the premise is that the other party has a very empathetic heart, not to pay the true heart to anyone casually, you can exchange it for the true heart.
For a particularly empathetic person, maybe your ten-heartedness, seven points of ability, will fall into the eyes of the other party will have twelve points of touch.
Someone touches your heart, someone just looks at your performance.
Some time ago, a friend and his parents had a little conflict, the specific reason, the friend has always felt that he is very sensible, dropped out of school from the age of 15, no matter what he encounters, he is to solve it by himself, and he is unwilling to bring trouble to his family. It is also very independent, and after starting a family, she understands her parents and reports good news but not worries.
However, because he did not actually show it, he denied his sincerity and filial piety, and questioned him: What have you done to us, whether you buy food today or buy and drink tomorrow.
It seems that this is also the truth, friends do not show, so this is the two sides of the sincerity, filial piety understanding and presupposition is not the same, friends just feel that parents still have the ability to make money, all aspects are not lacking, really need when there is a need, they are certainly not ambiguous, now is not there no need? Why should the parent-child relationship be hypocritical.
No one is right or wrong, it's just that everyone thinks differently and understands differently. Including in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is also the same, often can hear the mother-in-law, or as a daughter-in-law complains, why do you really treat your daughter-in-law (mother-in-law), or get along well? Whether you get along well or not is not all determined by sincerity or not, but also the way you get along, and the sense of boundaries that grasp the relationship, and finally you can't escape the preset standards of both parties for sincerity.
02
Everyone has a balance in their hearts and absolutely cares about the fairness of their senses and feelings. For example, if I am sincere with you, why don't you be sincere with me? But here it is still necessary to say that treating a person sincerely, do not have too high expectations, and can only talk about being unashamed.
It is good to be ashamed of yourself, it is good to be worthy of your own heart, don't worry about other things, don't think about it, whatever it is, just do yourself.
Expecting how the other person will appreciate you, how they expect the other person to reciprocate you, when you have such expectations, it means that you may also be disappointed. As big as the expectations, so much disappointment.
If the other party does not achieve the gratitude and reward you expect and preset, you will definitely be disappointed, and from disappointment will produce all kinds of anger, frustration, and chagrin of negative emotions, and then transform into accusations, doubts and doubts about the other party, even if you do not show it, the dissatisfaction in your heart is still there.
Then the next relationship may be difficult, becoming awkward, cold, and distant.
Also note that when you have a preset, it is doomed that the other party will not be able to achieve all your presets. You expect the other party to thank you, but the way of gratitude does not reach the level you preset, you will still feel unfair, thinking that I have paid ten points for you, why do you only pay me back seven points, as long as it is a person, you will think so.
Actually? The other party may have returned you ten points, but it fell into your eyes and became seven points, and it was the same back and forth. So it is best not to have expectations, do not have presets, two people are simple, the relationship will not be complicated, two people are complex, the relationship must not be simple.
03
Really, you can ask your heart without shame, no matter what the other party thinks, how tired, unless your heart is earning performance, otherwise why should you worry about it? You just give your heart, you are willing to give your heart, without any purpose, there is no expectation.
It is enough to be worthy of my own heart, thinking that I have done what I can, whether I can understand it or not, I am not ashamed.
As there is a saying in the "Heavenly Way": "Dedication is the standard, and to what extent it is not the standard." ”
This is pure sincerity, but in the matter of sincerity, there is also a realistic side, or money. Otherwise we will all have such questions, how do you really treat me? Sincerity, that is, to put the true heart on the mouth every day? Without proof, without performance, without action, sincerity is not sincerity.
And all the proofs, performances, actions, must be rich behind the support, not necessarily how much money I want to give you, at least when you encounter difficulties, I have money to help you, even if there is no money to help, but because of the strength of money, can let me free time to help you share.
If your own survival is a problem, then you don't have the energy to take care of the feelings of others, even if you can take care of it, your own survival is a problem, what else can prove your intention?
Sincerity can be exchanged for sincerity, although it is good, but if it cannot be exchanged, or the other party is a selfish, ungrateful person, then you must also stop paying, because this kind of person is never fed, no matter how good it is, it is useless, and may also be ungrateful, and the favor will be revenge. When I met an ungrateful person, I also poured out my heart and lungs to be kind to him, at best it was kind, and at worst it was a slut.
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