Tagore has a poem that says:
"If you cry all day because you miss the sun, the stars will leave you."
This poem stands in different angles, with different moods to understand, there are many moods.
People who have lost love look: every day trapped in the shadow of the last relationship, unable to extricate themselves, deeper and deeper, and finally missed many of the right people.
Frustrated people look: immersed in the pride and excellence of the past, unwilling to admit failure, and eventually become a philistine.
Dissatisfied people look: eating in the bowl, looking at the pot, the people around them do not know how to cherish, lost to regret.
In this life, many things are difficult to complete, just like fish and bear paws cannot be combined.
There are two paths in front of you, and if you can't have both, we should choose the one that suits you.
The same is true in love.
Why do some people have a high sense of happiness in love and are happy with their partners?
Why are some people who are clearly loved and spoiled, but still full of troubles?
It comes down to the end of the day: the former is content, the latter is ambitious.
-01
In the face of love, contentment is always happy
Love is not the whole of life, just the icing on the cake in life.
With love, your life will become colorful, so that you feel happy, happy, and cared for every day.
But many people, once they have love, see it as "all."
The partner did not reply to the message in time, he was hysterical and kept asking:
"Who are you with?" What are you busy with? Why don't you reply to my message? Don't you love me anymore? ”
Your partner is just confused in the face of your "serial questioning sentences" and does not know how to respond to you.
In fact, he was just too busy at work to do it.
The partner's recent state is somewhat silent, and his mind is sensitive:
"Why don't you talk, why don't you ignore me, why aren't you happy?" Is there something I'm not doing well enough? ”
In fact, he is not unhappy, but the recent work pressure is relatively large, he wants to slow down and give his emotions a holiday.
Everyone has an "emotional cave period".
People who are too sensitive have difficulty perceiving happiness in love.
Isn't this an extreme love?
Excessive demand for perfection, asking love to go on as you imagine, but love is not a toy, a partner is not an object, his flesh and blood and soul.
Some time ago, a female reader left a message.
The female reader said:
In love with a boyfriend for 2 years, I feel more and more bored, boring, and I don't feel fresh with my boyfriend.
At this time, another boy appeared around her who was pursuing her; this boy was interesting, talented, able to feel her emotions, and had many similarities with her.
Weighing the two, the female reader wants to break up with her boyfriend.
I replied to her like this:
"Maybe your lover isn't the best, but there must be something shining in him that no one else has; did you decide to be with him only because of the freshness?"
If you miss the person in front of you because you are "better," you will miss the other person as well.
It's like the story of "losing a watermelon and picking up sesame seeds."
Walking in a watermelon field, you always feel that there are bigger and better watermelons in front of you; so you keep walking down, picking up a large watermelon and throwing it away, and finally come to the end, and find that the largest watermelon is actually the one you picked up for the first time.
Isn't the same true of love?
-02
In the face of marriage, contentment is always happy
Some people enter marriage and begin to dislike their other half.
"There are more and more flaws in him, and I can't stand it.".
"He snores in his sleep, grinds his teeth, and his feet stink."
"He's lazy and doesn't want to do housework, and I'm too lazy to communicate with him."
"It's really boring to marry him."
But have you tried to change in the past?
No one is perfect, and there are flaws in everyone.
Don't you marry each other in order to create beauty together and discover beauty?
If you always grasp the shortcomings of the other party and do not let go, you will also miss out on many good things.
He may be lazy, but his cooking skills are impeccable;
He may sleep grinding his teeth and snoring, but he takes care of you;
He may not be good enough, but his love for you is real.
Don't compare your partner's shortcomings with those of others.
You have to compare the strengths of your partner with others, discover the good in him, and try to change his shortcomings.
Only if you have tried and tried, you are qualified to say "he is not good enough".
Marriage is run by two people together, and it is difficult for one person to have a good marriage;
Marriage requires working together with each other, and it is not okay for one person to move forward and one person to stop moving forward.
Marriage needs to be content, not "ambitious."
If you choose the other party, you should be more firm, more trusting, more understanding and action.
The reason why many people are disappointed in love is often: too ambitious, too little to do.
Want to be with "better people", but don't have the corresponding ability;
Want to love people more, but are not willing to invest in themselves;
Ambition is great, but ability and action are average.
Such a contradictory psychology appears in a person, how can his life be happy?
What is joy in love?
Happiness = what you expect - what you get.
If you want to increase happiness, then lower your expectations;
If you want your lover to become like this, first you have to become like this.
The best way to love someone is to be content.
Only when people learn to be content, can they have a peaceful attitude;
When you have a peaceful mind, you will have more good luck.
Lao Tzu said, "There is no greater sin than desire, no greater evil than disobedience; no greater blame than desire." Therefore contented feet, always feet. ”
Meaning: There is no greater evil for a person than dissatisfaction, no greater sin than insatiable greed; not cherishing what one has, pursuing nothing more than illusory things, will only lead to more misfortune.
Today's Topic:
In love, are you a "contented" person?