Interviewed hundreds of couples, found that the most prone to change of heart is often these types of men

There is an elderly couple in Shanghai's Xuhui district who, in the sixty years of marriage, have hardly cooked at home. Grandma said, I can't burn, he won't burn, I burned it is not delicious, he does not eat it when it comes out, I don't want to eat it myself.

Many netizens called directly, because this pair of grandfathers and grandmothers saw the most beautiful appearance of love.

Because we all know that marriage is a secular firework, chai rice oil and salt, it is difficult for any family to escape.

However, this old couple, in the company of more than half a century, is not blindly asking each other to change for themselves, but respecting each other and living a life that is most desirable.

Why are some couples able to persevere for decades, and some couples have lost their freshness just a few years after marriage, and their feelings have come to the brink of collapse?

Because of the need to write, I have chatted and communicated with hundreds of couples, and from the surface, it seems that they are ordinary marriages, but in fact, in those unhappy marriages, the most likely men to change their hearts are often these categories.

01 There is a big difference in performance before and after marriage

Sister Zhang was a very smiling woman before marriage, she looked beautiful, her family was not bad, and there were many men who pursued her.

However, Sister Zhang chose the unknown Brother Li, in the words of Sister Zhang, Brother Li has a delicate mind, and when they are together, no matter how big or small the festival, Brother Li can remember it in his heart.

Roses on birthdays, red envelopes for Valentine's Day, delicacies for anniversaries, ginger syrup for menstruation... He always changed his tricks to surprise her. Therefore, there was no more unhappiness in my heart, but when I saw Brother Li, the haze was swept away.

There are many high-quality men around Sister Zhang, but there are only a few who can compare with Brother Li's thoughtfulness. Therefore, Sister Zhang disregarded her parents' dislike of Brother Li's poor conditions and married him without hesitation.

However, after getting married, Sister Zhang found out how high the expectations before marriage were, and how much she was lost after marriage. Sister Zhang's birthday, the wedding anniversary of the two, Brother Li can forget, not to mention those inconspicuous little festivals.

Sister Zhang complained to him, but he said with an impatient look that getting married and falling in love are different, besides, people are married home, there is no need to hold high like a goddess, and living a life is not the same.

If it is only these situations, Sister Zhang can also understand, but sometimes it is clear that there are things at home, sending messages and not replying, not answering the phone, and finally getting in touch, but absent-mindedly scolding Sister Zhang for relying on him for everything.

Once, after Zhang Jie got married, she entrusted her parents to give Li Ge a working relationship, constantly pushing him to a promotion and salary increase behind his back. However, after only five or six years of marriage, Brother Li's salary has risen, and his attitude towards Sister Zhang is a sunset.

The most hateful thing is that when Sister Zhang gave birth to a child, Brother Li was unwilling to have a caesarean section and refused to sign it for a long time, if it were not for Sister Zhang's parents insisting, I am afraid that my life would be in danger.

When Sister Zhang was confinement, she found out by accident that all of these "attitudes" were behind his indifference.

As early as when Sister Zhang was pregnant, Brother Li already had a situation outside. And the reason why he spent so much thought on pursuing Sister Zhang was just to use her as a straddle and stepping stone.

02 Never save face for a woman in front of outsiders

As early as the old times when women had no status, they all knew that they trained their children in person and trained their wives behind their backs. Treat your wife with enough face and dignity.

Nowadays, the status of men and women has long been equal, and the mutual respect between husband and wife is the prerequisite for a happy marriage.

However, there are some men who like to show their noble status in front of outsiders, point fingers at their wives, call and drink, and burst into foul mouths when they are not satisfied, and even some men will do it.

Most of such marriages will not be happy to any extent, and it is difficult for such men to treat women's feelings specifically.

They have never put women on an equal footing with themselves, thinking that their wives are their appendages, marrying themselves, and humiliating them as much as they want, without considering women's feelings at all.

Marrying this type of man, even if his vows before marriage are beautiful, will eventually become a chicken feather.

03 You can only see your shortcomings forever

There is a saying that what you don't get is always good.

This feature is evident in men, but most men have a sense of responsibility and know how to be faithful to marriage, and they may have a lifetime of happiness and stability.

However, there are also some men who always feel that their wives are the good of other people's families, and their own women are always yellow-faced women, which is not attractive.

When they look at their wives, they are always a flaw, the children are not good, the food is not delicious, the people are ugly, they can't dress up... But I never thought about how the child grew up and why the family could keep the windows clear and clean.

The wife has no advantage in their eyes, and rarely considers taking her with her when she goes out, because she feels that there is no face.

This type of man is easy to see different ideas, it is difficult to be responsible for feelings, and it is easy to betray the family because of women outside marriage, after all, the wife will never be as good as the women outside.

Men who are faithful to marriage, they always see the wife's efforts; and they can only see the wife's shortcomings because they have never had a reverential heart for marriage.

Honey said in "Marriage Psychology" that marriage is a combination of two brains, body, gender, soul, spirit, hope, dreams, needs and different personalities, and only by appreciating this difference with reverence can each of them enjoy life to the greatest extent and truly love.

A good marriage is able to learn from each other's strengths, accompany and tolerate each other, support and understand each other, in order to live a life of poetry and far away.

I only know how to envy the happiness of others, but I don't know how to reflect on my own problems, even if it is to a good lover, it is difficult to maintain the long-term peace and stability of marriage.

A good man is not only able to make money and deal with interpersonal relationships with outsiders, but also knows how to respect his wife and be loyal to his feelings.

There's a Writer in england who says that whatever you give to a woman, you'll get more in return.

And if a man knows how to manage himself and work together with his wife, then happiness will always be with him.

END.