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Hugo, Notre Dame de Paris: "This is the twilight sun, but we regard it as the dawn of dawn." ”
If the illusion just makes a joke, it may make you embarrassed, but it is harmless; but if the illusion creates a relationship tragedy, it will be unforgettable and even affect your life.
The emotional illusion will not be to treat "love" as "no love", but basically to treat "no love" as "love". Either you think you are in love with someone else, or you think that others are in love with you, or you blindly think that your fate has arrived and you have met true love.
Such feelings are wrong from the beginning, if they are not recognized in time, they will blindly pay, and in the end they will not only not be rewarded, but may even be seriously hurt.
Especially if you mistakenly love a person with an unhealthy heart, she herself wants to find a wronged head, and as a result, you take the initiative to send it to the door, and in the next few days, you are destined to be tortured by her.
The following man has had such an emotional experience, let's listen to his story together.
Hello Mr. Donglin:
Although I met people because I had no eyes, I just reflected on myself and could not alleviate the pain in my heart. I felt like I had to hate my ex-wife or I would have a hard time mentally balancing.
Once upon a time when I pursued her, she was always ambiguous, neither rejecting nor accepting. Then she suddenly fell in love with someone else, and I realized that I was being used as a spare tire by her.
Because the loss was not large at that time, and it was not too much damage, it was not taken too seriously.
Later, after graduating from college, a casual party made us intersect again. She sat next to me that day, drank a lot of wine, and then fell drunk in my arms (now that I think she was deliberately pretending to be drunk because her alcohol intake was not so bad), I was confused, and my feelings for her had revived.
Early the next morning she launched her offensive and easily took me down.
Linking the past miss with the later reunion, I think we are not in the front, and it must be heaven that brought us back together. People say that the elder moon who is in charge of marriage will tie the red thread to the neck of the person who has a relationship, even if it is separated by thousands of mountains and rivers, it will come together. I thought we were in this situation.
She did not give me the opportunity to examine love carefully, and she was eager to marry me, and offered to go home with me to see my in-laws. My parents were also fascinated by her rhetoric, and then they stopped and sang, and in the blink of an eye we became husband and wife.
I felt like everything was like a dream, and the only detail that made me feel like it wasn't the dream was a long list of bills: engagement cost a lot of money, gift money cost a lot, wedding cost a lot of money, the most spent was buying a house... All the money was spent by our family.
The pace of our lives didn't slow down because we got married, it was still urgent, it was urgent, until she was pregnant, the pace was a little slower, but it was only a little slower than before, and it was actually still fast.
She quit her job just after she was pregnant, and I don't think so. However, what I can't stand is that she is not at this time to raise a baby, but to eat, drink and have fun.
Usually she drinks, even if she is pregnant, she always drinks, calls on friends and companions, makes the family smoke miasma, eats things that are not good for the fetus, which makes me very angry, and my parents have advised her to take care of her body more than once.
However, she never appreciates it, whether I remind her or my parents remind her, it will be exchanged for a scolding: "Shut up if you don't understand!" I have my own body and my own mind, and I don't need you to teach me how to do it! ”
My mother took the initiative to ask Miao to take care of her, and she drove my mother away in front of me: "This is my home, you are not welcome!" ”
Then she took her parents over, and at the same time did not forget to continue to call on friends and companions, spend days and nights, and humiliate me every time she drank too much, deliberately looking down on me in front of outsiders, showing off how she had taken me down at that time, and showing off how she made me obediently pay for her to buy a house.
I was very angry, but considering that she was pregnant, I didn't dare say anything that stimulated her, so I kept putting up with it.
I think about her everywhere, but she doesn't know how to think about me, and she doesn't know how to think about the child in her belly. As a result, because she did not care for her body, the child was not saved.
In addition to the pain, I tried to avoid making her angry. However, she blamed me, blamed me for not taking good care of her, blamed my mother for not taking care of her.
It's okay to be angry with me, but what's the matter with my mom? She originally drove my mother away and did not let my mother take care of her, but she only bit back and blamed my mother for not taking care of her, and her conscience would not hurt?
What happened later made me realize that she had no conscience at all. She lured me into marrying her by throwing hugs, creating the illusion of love for me, just to calculate.
I just defended my mom a few times when she denigrated my mom, and she went crazy and wanted to divorce me.
I had this in mind, so I readily agreed to her request. Seeing that I promised to be so happy, she was not happy: "Divorce is OK, the house belongs to me, you get out of the house!" ”
I said that the house would not be thrown away to you: "The house was bought by our family, and the mortgage has always been repaid by myself, so why give it to you?" If you marry me just to get a house, I can only say that your abacus is wrong, or you are too clever, and in any case, you don't want to count my house away! ”
I don't know who she consulted, but when she learned that she really didn't want to leave the house, she started playing a rogue and saying that she didn't want to get a divorce. I was determined to get a divorce, and she began to mess around: "I'm a graduate student, why are you divorcing me!" With me by your side, you will have a light on your face, without me, you are nothing! ”
What a joke! Without her, I would only live better!
She was ready to die with me, wanting me to concede defeat, and I decided to accompany me to the end! I threw her stuff out, changed the lock on the door, and figured out all sorts of ways to sell the house at a low price. She continues to consume when she has the ability, and I don't care anyway.
Donglin Xiting Emotional Advice:
From a person's daily speech and demeanor, we can see the character of this person. When interests are involved, the character of the character will be more obvious.
Whether a person's character is good or bad is directly related to these qualities: whether he is selfish, whether he is narcissistic, whether he is self-centered, whether he is not right in his heart, and whether he always denies others.
From this point of view, the man's wife is a person with a very poor personal character. On the surface, she called for friends all day, as if she had a lot of friends, as if she had a good character. In fact, whether a person's character is good or not cannot be seen through fox friends.
But through marriage, we can see whether a person's character is good or bad. I have been in contact with people similar to his wife, they are often only children, selfish and self-narcissistic, think that everyone in the world spoils them like their fathers, never praises others, always takes pleasure in denying others, only wants to take advantage of others and does not want to suffer, even if they let others suffer huge losses, they do not take it seriously, and they try their best to calculate others, even if they have been playing rogues.
Men marrying such women are often forced into a dead corner. Especially after having children, they always trample on the dignity of men, knowing that men dare not divorce them, even if men are tired from work for a day, just lie down and fall asleep, they will wake up men and quarrel with him, forcing men to admit their mistakes and apologize. At every turn, divorce is used to blackmail men and ask men to get out of the house.
Such a woman is not only not a good wife, but also a qualified mother. Their parenting style makes people feel disgusting, always encouraging children to be selfish, encouraging children to disrespect people, encouraging children to take other people's things casually, to put it bluntly, is to raise children to be like them rotten people. I don't know if they will be punished, I just know that if a vicious circle continues, there can be no good results.