Wen | Cheats Jun
As a parent, the most gratifying thing should be brought by the child. When they are sick or feel uncomfortable, the child is next to the tea and pours water, the old father and the old mother will have a feeling of being soothed: this child, not in vain!
If the parents are old, sick and hospitalized, and the child can also be saddled up and taken care of, it is even more a manifestation of filial piety. Not only are parents happy, but even people around them will praise it.
But there is an example around me, the old father has been hospitalized for many years, the son and daughter-in-law have taken good care of it, and even the daughter of the old man will not come to the hospital. The nurses at the hospital looked on coldly and accused their sons and daughters-in-law of being "filial piety." What's going on?
The father is sick in bed for many years, the son and daughter-in-law take care of it, true filial piety or false filial piety?
One of my cousins, who was a nurse in her hometown hospital, told us about it. In their intensive care unit, there is an old man living for many years, and it has been two or three years now.
As soon as I finished listening to the beginning, I felt incredible, after all, this kind of local expenses are not talking about playing, and it is not an exaggeration to say that it is a daily spending. This family can let the old man live in it all the time, it must be the children filial piety and gold.
Unexpectedly, the cousin shook her head, saying that it was an ordinary family, the children, the son and daughter-in-law took over the care of the old man throughout the process, and the daughter came to the hospital several times and was persuaded by the daughter-in-law to leave, so that she did not have to bother. It seems that the son and daughter-in-law are very filial, right? But clear-eyed people know that this is not to understand the old man, but to use the old man as a cash cow, and to help them "make money" when they suffer from sin!
It turned out that the old man was a retired cadre and had a good treatment. Not only are all hospitalization medical expenses reimbursed, but there are more than 10,000 pensions every month. Moreover, if you are sick and hospitalized, if your family takes care of it, you can also get a daily care fee.
Such a good errand, the son did not let go of the stop, he let his wife quit his job, every day to report to the hospital, in fact, it is equivalent to receiving a daily salary. The reason for not allowing his daughter to come is to prevent her from sharing the money with him.
Their calculations were played well, and the old man in the custody room was seriously guilty. The throat tube is cut open and a ventilator is inserted, and the root tube in the nose is used for nasal feeding, and the nutrition paste is injected by the person every day. Words can not be said, food does not know the taste, sometimes the throat rolling seems to have something to say, after a few whimpers, the eyes are moist first.
The nurses couldn't bear to see it, and felt that the old man was really suffering here. Let the old man live without the slightest quality of life, can the son and daughter-in-law be considered filial piety?
When relatives have no quality of life due to illness, is it filial piety to give up, or is it filial piety not to give up?
What my cousin said was really extreme. But similar things around me are not nothing.
I heard a colleague talk about her grandfather in the hospital. Grandpa was seriously ill, and the children around him took turns to come to the hospital to take care of him, and his wife was also on the side. She said that when her grandfather's hands could still move, she once commanded someone to take a note with the words "give up treatment", and the children looked at the circles of their eyes and turned red, scolding him for saying what he thought, you still have a father in us, if you don't have us, we will become children without fathers!
At that time, I didn't feel anything, but I just thought that the children of this family were quite filial. But combined with what my cousin said, I suddenly had other ideas in my heart: is it really good to let the old man live against his will and without quality of life?
We all imagine ourselves as old, and the ideal state is, of course, to end up in sleep, without illness or pain. However, in reality, the majority of people die of illness. What should I do if I have an incurable disease? Many people will say proudly, when the time comes, there will be a hard time.
But the truth is that the quality of life of many people before death is not determined by themselves, but by their children.
In the book "The Best Farewell", the term "hospice care" is proposed, to the effect that if you have an incurable disease, is it to use active means to undergo painful radiotherapy and chemotherapy, wait for the hair to fall out and teeth to fall out, spend the last moments of life in side effects or ventilators, or choose negative treatment to relieve pain, and spend it quietly in a hospice ward or at home, accompanied by a family member?
The former has a lower quality of life but a longer survival time; the latter sacrifices the length of life in exchange for a relatively high quality of life.
【How would you choose?】 】
Senior nursery, psychological counselor. Understand the parenting and psychology, but also pay attention to the self-growth and family management of baoma, and strive to be the intimate person of mothers.
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