Hello, hello everyone, here is "Horses Talk About Emotions", pay attention to me to learn more emotional stories, so that every heart that needs warmth can be comforted, I hope that everyone can get a moment of ease and ease here, and better face the emotional life.
Can marriage change the fate of poverty and misery? Don't be silly.
Marrying well is something that every woman yearns for, just like every man wants to marry a good daughter-in-law is the same truth, but in the end, feelings are the purest and most sexual things, when your fate is made hypocritical and utilitarian and not classy, marriage will only become a shackle cage, trampling on your dignity and self-confidence, making your fate more unbearable.
Zhang Ru (pseudonym) and her husband Qin Tianyuan (pseudonym) have been married for 25 years, and the two have a son who is now 23 years old, and the family of three lives in a rental house, but since last July, the in-laws returned from visiting relatives in the UK and took Qin Tianyuan away without a word.
In fact, at that time, Zhang Ru did not know that her in-laws had returned from Britain, and she was not very clear about her husband's departure, in short, no matter how she called her husband, she could not get through, so that she still thought that something had happened to her husband, and soon after, Zhang Ru received a divorce agreement written by her husband.
This move really confused Zhang Ru, because before the incident, she and her husband did not have a conflict, and have been living together, but recalling the contradiction between her and her in-laws more than ten years ago, Zhang Ru feels that this matter is not simple.
Originally, Zhang Ru has been living with her in-laws since she married into the Qin family, until 2009, the sister-in-law also grew up, the contradictions in the family continued, she had to choose to move out to live, and now the front foot of the in-laws returned from the United Kingdom, and the husband of the back foot was going to divorce himself, Zhang Ru concluded that behind this divorce must be instigated by the mother-in-law.
At this time, Zhang Ru's heart was also somewhat unbalanced, she frankly said that her in-laws had previously served in a certain organ unit in Changsha, and her father-in-law was still a section chief, and now she is a retired cadre, who lives in a large house of 180 square meters, while we are renting a house.
At the moment, Zhang Ru rushed to her in-laws' house with her sister and wanted to ask about things clearly, but after the two sides met, there was a fierce quarrel, and the mother-in-law Li Cuilan (pseudonym) was even more angry, and she aimed her spearhead at her daughter-in-law Zhang Ru.
Li Cuilan said bluntly that it was daughter-in-law Zhang Ru who chose to quit, she did not want to live with Qin Tianyuan, the reason why we would return from Britain was also to get a distress call from her son Qin Tianyuan, who said on the phone: Mother come back quickly, otherwise I will die.
When we came back and saw our son Qin Tianyuan, he was thin like an old man in his 70s, the reason why his son wanted to divorce was that he also found that Zhang Ru was cheating, when he followed Zhang Ru, he found that Zhang Ru was in the same room with a strange man, and then the door was closed, and Qin Tianyuan could not enter.
At this time, Qin Tianyuan on the side was also very sure, yes, his wife Zhang Ru was cheating, I just have no real evidence, but I followed to the gate, they locked the door, I can't get in.
Listen, Zhang Ru's sister preemptively opened her mouth, she said that these are brother-in-law misunderstandings, at that time it was the sister in the hospital, the doctor went to check the room, if you don't believe it, you can go to check.
Then Zhang Ru also explained that he was at work every day with his colleagues, and he didn't play cards and didn't do anything, these can go to colleagues to inquire, every day at work is very tired, back home Qin Tianyuan also let him take him out for a walk, where he has that energy, and then he said that I have any improper relationship with others.
Obviously these words Qin family does not agree, mother-in-law Li Cuilan said that as soon as she came back, she listened to the neighbors, Zhang Ru dressed like a little girl in her 20s every day, and wore a miniskirt, if she only listened to others, she did not believe it, as long as her son was willing to be with her, even if she wore anything, but her son also said that she was cheating, then she had to believe.
Subsequently, Qin Tianyuan talked about the reason for the matter alone, it turned out that Qin Tianyuan was disabled, his wife Zhang Ru had not slept with him for half a year, and Qin Tianyuan, as a man, would of course have doubts, because his wife would go out every night, and she would wear lipstick and draw eyebrows before going out.
The wife's makeup behavior is very incomprehensible in Qin Tianyuan's eyes, after all, who is the makeup for when going out this big night? Not only that, every time he went out for a walk, Qin Tianyuan asked his wife to take him along, but every time he would be rejected.
Later one day, Qin Tianyuan called his wife, but he did not expect that it was a man who answered and told her to get up, Qin Tianyuan thought that his wife had two hearts, in addition to which he could not think of any other reason why his wife did not sleep with him.
Zhang Ru completely denied this, she showed that her husband was suspicious, all day long suspected that he was with this, with that, in fact, he was at work every day, it was only after his mother-in-law returned that her husband left, Zhang Ru believes that these are all mother-in-law playing on the topic, the purpose is to drive herself out.
Mother-in-law Li Cuilan once again argued on the basis of reason, she retorted why Zhang Ru had time to go out for a walk with others but did not have time to go out for a walk with her husband? It's a fact that you haven't lived with him since 2018.
At the moment, Li Cuilan also said that her daughter-in-law Zhang Ru has been married to our family for more than 20 years, food, clothing, housing and travel are all arranged by us, the daughter-in-law did not spend a penny, she still had to argue, had to move out to live, and repeatedly told Qin Tianyuan that we should transfer the property to her son's name, and now she treats Qin Tianyuan with two hearts, and covets the family property, her ideas are too much, of course, our family can not tolerate.
Zhang Ru admitted that she did say that she let Qin Tianyuan transfer the property to her son's name, but she moved out of the family because her mother-in-law was too strong, her cotton thread, necklace and other things could not be found, they all said that I took it, I cooked in the kitchen, she came in and beat me, so how can I get along with them?
I had no choice but to go out with a family of three, and of course I had to say why I was right, but in my mother-in-law's eyes, she said that I was sharp-mouthed.
In Zhang Ru's view, marrying into the Qin family has always been like a nanny, taking care of her husband and raising her son, and now that she is more than half a hundred years old, she has lost her use value, so the in-laws have found various reasons to try to drive themselves away. So why did Zhang Ru marry her disabled husband in the first place?
At this time, Li Cuilan recalled the past. It turned out that Qin Tianyuan's high fever did not regress when he was 1 year old, resulting in disability, and when Qin Tianyuan was old enough to start a family, as a parent, he was more anxious, and eventually they chose a wife for their children in the form of finding a nanny, and Zhang Ru, who was born in the countryside, became a candidate, and the age was similar, so Zhang Ru became the nanny of the Qin family, the purpose was to let Zhang Ru and Qin Tianyuan contact each other first.
After that, Zhang Ru worked as a nanny in the Qin family for 3 years, when the Qin family's parents said this matter to the end, Zhang Ru also gladly accepted, so the two got married, but just after receiving the marriage license, Zhang Ru and Qin Tianyuan had a conflict, for which Li Cuilan did not want Zhang Ru as a daughter-in-law, she thought that Zhang Ru was not officially married now to her son, then if she lived together in the future, she would have to live together?
It was only as Qin Tianyuan's father who was worried about being worried, but he was still very realistic, seeing his disabled son, he was afraid that after missing this village, his son would never find a partner again, so he persuaded him in the middle.
Speaking of this, Li Cuilan's emotions suddenly became excited, she scolded her daughter-in-law for being an ungrateful woman, considering that her son was disabled, thinking of the hardships of her daughter-in-law Zhang Ru, in order to stabilize Zhang Ru, she had not paid less for so many years.
Even if the daughter-in-law moves out to stand on her own, she also bears the tuition and living expenses of her grandchildren, and also helps her daughter-in-law's relatives, just think of being nice to her daughter-in-law, in the future, when we leave, she can also be nice to her son Qin Tianyuan, this piece of heaven makes her stand up, but she will take revenge.
At this time, Zhang Ru's father-in-law stood up, he suggested that Zhang Ru should not confront her mother-in-law, bow her head and admit her mistake and qin Tianyuan go home to live a good life, if I were you, I would kneel down and prostrate myself with my mother-in-law now, in the future these things are all yours, my daughter settled in England, these family properties are left to Qin Tianyuan.
Li Cuilan also said that she had told Zhang Ru many times that this day would make her stand up in the future, after all, as a parent, she would definitely go first, and this family still needed her to top, but she was too anxious, if she was good to Qin Tianyuan, of course, these would be left to her, if not good, it would certainly not be given to her.
But Li Cuilan, who returned to God, also experienced that her husband was hinting at her daughter-in-law, and she was suddenly angry, and immediately she quarreled with her husband, my son is a disabled person, where to win her, when the son is in trouble, do you take care of it? By now, you still help your daughter-in-law with her work.
These words really frightened the old man, and he immediately denied it one after another, I didn't do the work, I didn't do it. It is not difficult to see that Li Cuilan is indeed relatively strong in life, so that as a husband, she does not have much say.
Looking at the quarrel of her in-laws, Zhang Ru is also very clear in her heart that her father-in-law does not want to divorce herself, but her mother-in-law believes that divorce is imperative, and she feels that all this is in her mother-in-law's calculations, after all, only women know women better. She didn't want to stay in the house for a second, and then turned and left.
After returning home, Zhang Ru confessed that at that time in 1992, she was working as a nanny in the Qin family, and when she returned home in the New Year, they would give 200 yuan, and then buy a train ticket, and the reason why she would marry Qin Tianyuan, who was disabled, was because in their era, how many people dreamed of being able to live a carefree life from the countryside to the city, so she did not think too much about it.
But what Zhang Ru did not expect was that she thought it was the beginning of happiness, but it was the beginning of misfortune, the sister-in-law was more than ten years younger than Qin Tianyuan, she used to be a nanny when she had to serve a family of four, cooking and buying vegetables and washing clothes every day, three years later, it was difficult to become a daughter-in-law, but still doing the work of a nanny, with a child, it became to serve a family of five.
Zhang Ru felt that although she had changed from the identity of a nanny to a wife, she had no status at all, and her in-laws had always treated her as an outsider, seemingly from the countryside to the city, but in fact, her life was worse than that of the countryside, and she had no right to know anything about the affairs of the family, and she had to watch her mother-in-law's face carefully.
The whole family is very wary of her, and even if she does not agree with her mother-in-law, she will move, if she resists, she will be insulted by the whole family, and under all kinds of friction, Zhang Rucai chose to move out and stand on her own.
Speaking, Zhang Ru took out the moving agreement written down that year, and the mother-in-law promised to give her son 700 yuan per month living expenses and bear all the tuition fees of her son, but later Zhang Ru learned that her husband's salary card was all kept by her mother-in-law, and in fact, the money from her mother-in-law was her husband's salary.
In Zhang Ru's view, even if he moved out, the economic lifeblood of the small family is still under the control of the mother-in-law, and now the mother-in-law has taken Qin Tianyuan back, cut off his rent, and let himself go out of the house, all of which seems to have been premeditated by the mother-in-law.
At this time, as Zhang Ru's colleagues for more than 20 years, there are also words that in the eyes of colleagues, Zhang Ru is an upright and kind person, not at all what her mother-in-law said is a petty thief, and as far as they see, Zhang Ru's mother-in-law rushed to the unit to beat Zhang Ru at least 3 times, and Zhang Ru has never returned her hand once, but as for why her mother-in-law beat Zhang Ru, they are not very clear as colleagues.
Colleagues for Zhang Ru hugging uneven, Zhang Ru every morning will make porridge and steamed bread and some of the early sent back to her husband to eat, noon is the same, just so day after day of persistence, she is a simple thinking of the rural woman, every day did not see her happy, always frown locked to close themselves, not to mention that she has friends of the opposite sex, colleagues feel that there are strong mother-in-law everywhere fortified, Zhang Ru ended up like this is not surprising.
Listen, Zhang Ru shed sad tears, perhaps so many years, she also felt that it was not worth it, and then she took out a newspaper, originally her husband Qin Tianyuan had a welfare house under his name, Zhang Ru was still known through the newspaper after being expropriated in 2015, and more than 800,000 yuan of the levy also fell into the pocket of the Qin family's parents.
Zhang Ru believes that now the Qin family has 4 properties, so many years he has never thought of competing for anything, if the husband insists on divorce, then he should also have a foothold, after all, so many years of hard work for this family, no merit and hard work, you must fight back to your own property.
Just before fighting, Zhang Ru wanted to hear the idea of her son Qin Kai (pseudonym), and the next day Zhang Ru dialed her son's phone, but what she did not expect was that her son approved of her divorce, but it was very unreasonable to fight for real estate, because his grandparents attached great importance to him, and the tuition and living expenses were all paid by them.
Hearing that her son was obviously partial to the Qin family, Zhang Ru's mood suddenly collapsed, she scolded and regretted raising her son, really chilling, she originally thought that her son could realize that he was for him for so many years, she did not think of her son but was full of complaints that her mother did not give him a better life, complaining that her mother and grandparents fought to cause a peaceful day at home.
Zhang Ru did not want her son to confront her grandparents, but just wanted him to stand in the middle position and say a fair word for himself, but her son's words also made Zhang Ru unexpected, she guessed her son's intentions, if the son followed him, he may not get anything, and the Qin family with 4 suites in the family is different, they can place their sons very well.
At this moment, Qin Kai came down from the upper floor, and he once again blamed his mother, why didn't you go up? Why is it still in this position today?
Such a remark once again deeply stung Zhang Ru, she said to her son very wordlessly, mom is not superhuman, can not do everything, take care of the family, but also take care of you, how can you still take care of the career, your father is a disability, when all things are strongly supported by me to run, there is extra energy, mom will also be tired.
If it weren't for the fact that you have a complete family, in order to take on the responsibility of raising your son, even if you were unhappy to live, you never thought about divorce, isn't everything for you? At this moment, Zhang Ru's heart was like a knife, she regretted raising her son, she knew that her son was like this, she might as well leave early.
Knowing her son's attitude, Zhang Ru turned away, she came to the Qin family again to negotiate, only this time the in-laws were not at home, as a husband Qin Tianyuan was alone at home, no matter what he asked, Qin Tianyuan always answered that his parents were not at home, he had no right to answer any questions, he needed a guardian, he had to listen to his parents' opinions.
Zhang Ru on the side was completely angry, she yelled at her husband, we are two husbands and wives, not your parents and I are husband and wife, it is they who have no rights, not you. But to be more true with a person with an incomplete IQ, isn't that embarrassing yourself? What can you ask?
At the moment, Zhang Ru also dialed the phone of her mother-in-law Li Cuilan, Li Cuilan's attitude is still very strong, she said that she will not negotiate with Zhang Ru again, divorce can be done at any time, but all the property in the family has nothing to do with Zhang Ru, and she hung up the phone after saying it.
At this time, Zhang Ru, who was isolated and helpless, walked on the street and shed tears again, there were grievances, there was unwillingness, Zhang Ru's sister Zhang Ying really could not bear to see her sister continue to be wronged here, she persuaded her sister to go home, we sisters can also live very well.
With the encouragement of her sister, Zhang Ying nodded, for her this is a helpless decision, in order to fight for breath, or perhaps for her son, Zhang Ru is willing to go out of the house and sue for divorce on the next day.
For Zhang Ru, she originally wanted to change her life trajectory and destiny through marriage, so she chose Qin Tianyuan, who was disabled, not to talk about the right, nor to talk about the heartbeat, only to know that she could go out of the countryside.
It's just that her marriage is not a matter of two sons, but a big family's business, from nanny to daughter-in-law, from beginning to end can not get rid of the identity of the nanny, never respected, in front of the in-laws is even more inferior, dependent marriage also means the loss of their right to speak.
Perhaps Zhang Ru can also enjoy a worry-free and wealthy life, but the premise of enjoyment is to rely on humble knees in marriage and large families in exchange, but Zhang Ru is not such a person, in the mother-in-law's strong and disabled husband has no right to speak, this marriage makes her heart haggard, exhausted, and huge mental pressure, so she wants to escape, can't stand it, naturally can't enjoy it, but wasted more than twenty years in vain.
What if marriage can change us? Either they grow together and the happiness and success of two people; or they sink together, and two people are half a pound, because only true love can fulfill each other, and only selfish desires can destroy each other!
Happiness and happiness in the emotional world require two people to work together, and we should also let go of those who have no saving value in time and spend more time to do something meaningful.
What do you think of this marriage that has lasted so long but has not been married? Are you still willing to believe that marriage can change your destiny? Everyone is welcome to express their opinions and give different views, thank you.
Well today's story is here, the horse hopes that each issue of the story can bring friends a little emotional thinking, like the horse, please pay attention to me, give the article praise collection recommended Oh, thank you we will see you in the next issue ~