Often seen on the Internet men complain that the marriage is not smooth, which roughly means that the wife dislikes herself for not making money in the past two years, so she no longer dresses up carefully, loses her temper all day, and some also proposes a divorce, and the man finally comes to the conclusion that "the husband and wife are originally the same forest bird, and the big disaster is about to fly separately", and the woman is very realistic.
The economic base determines the superstructure, and psychologically speaking, whether the marriage is happy or not is really closely related to the man's income. So how much money does a man have to make every month to maintain the stability of the marriage?
Let's start by looking at the meaning of marriage. A couple from love to marriage, the biggest change is that they are no longer limited to talking about love, traveling and watching movies, but jointly carry out two kinds of production activities, one is the production of the population, the other is the production of means of subsistence, that is, giving birth to children with children, making money to buy a house and a car to raise children.
Let us first examine the productive activities of the population. Whether you agree or not, the contributions of men and women are incomparable in the reproductive process of any family, and there is no comparison at all.
When women are inconvenient to travel in October because of pregnancy, cannot sleep at night, and experience many embarrassing obstetric examinations, men are relaxed and at ease, which will not affect normal work and social interaction;
Women give birth, bear severe physical pain, when the ghost door is closed, men can only wait anxiously outside the delivery room, can not provide substantial help, some are also addicted to games, play happily;
Women need to pay attention to their children 24 hours after giving birth, breastfeeding, teaching children to talk, recognizing people and things, guiding children to climb and walk, many women have to become full-time housewives without security (bao mu) because they are not at ease with others, and their careers have stagnated for a long time.
In terms of contribution, men's contribution is summed up in 0, which is not excessive. But considering that men have endured a certain amount of mental pressure throughout the process, it is advisable to symbolically give men a score of 1, while women's contribution index is 99 points.
Examine the production of means of subsistence again. Under normal circumstances, society requires men to bear the main responsibility in this activity, paying off mortgages and car loans, raising children, daily household expenses, etc. Taking into account the fact that men do nothing in the first activity, it is natural for women to ask men to compensate in the second activity.
So how much does this compensation have to be reasonable? That is to say, how much should a man's monthly income be, so as not to count women's upside down and suffer losses?
It is easy to understand the relationship between husband and wife for the time being to become an ordinary relationship. If there are two leaders in the workplace in terms of status and ability, once they encounter an unexpected accident, they will have a leadership competition, fighting for red ears, thereby increasing the difficulty of coping with the crisis, and if the strength of ordinary friends is too disparate, there will be a strong contrast between pride and inferiority, and the disintegration of friendship is just around the corner.
The same is true of conjugal relationships. The family of two top players is often no one will let anyone, no one will accept defeat, and couples with too different comprehensive strength will unconsciously form a hierarchical system of command and obedience.
So, what exactly should this right ratio be? To solve this problem, the "golden section principle" must be introduced.
According to my observations for many years, when the proportion of comprehensive contribution of men and women in two production activities conforms to the principle of the golden section, family relations can reach a harmonious state, and marriage can be regarded as having a stable foundation.
The principle of the golden section is a method of dividing a line segment into two parts, so that the ratio of the longer part to the full length is equal to the ratio of the short part to the long part. The ratio of these two is an irrational number, and the approximation of the first three digits is 0.618.
Because it has a high aesthetic value in the plastic arts, the use of this ratio can trigger people's sense of beauty, so it is widely used in the design of the length and width of arts and crafts and daily necessities, such as the Eiffel Tower, the model's requirement for leg length.
For another example, the announcer on the stage is not standing in the center of the stage, but on the side of the stage, in order to stand at the golden section of the stage length of the position is the most beautiful, the sound transmission effect is the best.
Even the growth of plants follows the principle of the golden section, and if you look down from the top of a young branch, you will find that all the leaves are arranged according to the law of the golden section.
Therefore, family life is no exception, and marriages that conform to the laws of the golden section are often the most stable and happiest.
However, women should account for 61.8% of the total contribution in the family, rather than the men we usually think of as more, so male: female = 0.618: 0.382. (Why?) Readers who don't understand can leave a message in the comment area, and I will answer you seriously)
Let's calculate it.
In our means of subsistence activities, the contribution index of women is X, and the contribution index of men is 100-X. This is shown in the following table:
Assuming that pregnancy and childbirth are of the same importance as making money to support the family, that is, many people often say "equality between men and women", then: (99 + X) / 2 = 61.8
99+X=123.6
X=24.6
Of course, it is also possible to use the data column equation of men, and the same result will be obtained.
Let's substitute X=24.6 into the table:
As can be seen from the table above, when the composite contribution index of men and women reaches the golden section, the contribution index of women's means of subsistence production is 24.6 points, and men's is 75.4 points. Male/female ≈3 (times).
Therefore, we can draw the following three conclusions:
1. If the contribution to the production of means of subsistence is reduced to the monthly income of wage earners, then when the wage income of the man is 3 times the wage income of the woman, the comprehensive contribution index of the two parties reaches the golden point.
2. The foregoing conclusion is only established on the premise that men and women are equally distributed in the housework, and in view of the fact that some men are reluctant to participate in housework, they should be required to compensate the woman in the form of wage income, so that the wage income of men who do not do housework should reach at least 4 times that of women.
3. As shown in the table, the composite contribution index of women is 61.8, while that of men is only 38.2, so a normal family should operate with women as the core of leadership.
At this point, the ancients have already made a hint through the writing of the word "An", that is, there are women in the family to ensure peace. (Again, it's "a" woman.) ）
The evolution of the word "An" from oracle bone to letter is like this:
Therefore, when a woman's income changes, men should also adjust their income in time to maintain the harmony of the husband and wife relationship, if it is below this standard, it means that the man has taken advantage of the marriage:
As shown in the table, when a woman's monthly income reaches more than 200,000 yuan, the family has a high probability of achieving financial freedom, the man's economic income is dispensable, and the direction of family relations depends more on other factors and is not in the scope of this article.
finish.