"Take care of your daughter, don't disturb my son" Someone said to you, what do you do?
Colleague Kang Jie was depressed for a long time because of such a text message. The 14-year-old daughter, who has always been a well-behaved girl, has never let Sister Kang worry before this, but it is this worry-free child who has recently been criticized by the teacher, the reason is that the little girl fell in love early.
At first, Sister Kang didn't quite believe it, her daughter still understood, her daughter couldn't hide things, and it was impossible to talk about such a big thing in love without flaws. It wasn't until Sister Kang received a call from her teacher that she began to pay attention to this issue. Slowly, Sister Kang wavered, especially from the few things her daughter loved to buy, this child who had just entered adolescence could really be in love.
Girls in early love love all love to buy 4 things, see if your family has it?
Since receiving the teacher's call, Sister Kang has paid great attention to her daughter's every move. But except for returning to the house half an hour early every day, the little girl was no different. Until one day, Sister Kang saw her daughter's mobile phone case and found that the original "early love" had traces to follow. Slowly, she found a few more things, and confirmed her opinion even more.
She found that her daughter in early love especially likes to buy the following things:
Couple phone cases
When Sister Kang cleaned the room, she accidentally found the mobile phone case that her daughter eliminated, and there were 7 or 8 in the box. Her daughter used to love to buy these gadgets, she never paid too much attention, always thought that little girls liked these cute and loving trinkets.
Until that day, she saw a box of mobile phone cases in which one was a picture of two little people kissing, the one in the daughter's hand was the little girl doll, and the little boy's mobile phone case was in who, it goes without saying! Sister Kang said: "The moment the physical evidence was in hand, it was confirmed that what the teacher said was true. ”
Couple shoes
After discovering the mobile phone case, Sister Kang paid special attention to her daughter's accessories, and slowly found that the shoes her daughter bought were also couples!
On this point, Yumi's mother heard her cousin who was the class teacher say, she said: "Today's children generally wear school uniforms in school, and they can't reflect their differences, and shoes have become the key." Some children who fall in love early will buy couple shoes in order to express 'love'. Carefully observe that if the two opposite sexes in the class go closer and often wear the same shoes, this kind of early love is nine times out of ten, and one grabs a quasi. ”
Pairs of trinkets
The possessiveness of adolescent children is really reflected in all aspects, And Sister Kang said that her girl not only has the same shoes and mobile phone cases, but the bracelet is also a couple's model!
Adolescent children have long had their own view of right and wrong, they know that parents and teachers can not accept, can not blatantly show love, can only poke and poke sugar. For example, make a pair of bracelets, watches, or make a couple's trinket to hang on the bag, or make a couple's avatar on the social platform. As if to announce to the whole world: we are a couple!
This naïve and provocative idea sometimes makes people cry and laugh.
Buy makeup
In addition to some couple accessories, Kang Jie found that her daughter was still secretly watching some beauty videos, two red lipsticks were put in the bag, and sunscreen was also replaced with whitening effect. I even mentioned that when I graduated from junior high school, I wanted to learn makeup.
At that time, Sister Kang was also very happy to agree, after all, she did not wear makeup, she felt 10 years older than her peers, and her daughter had this awareness since she was a child. Unexpectedly, this is actually the daughter reminding her: "Women are pleasing to themselves", and the little girl has a girlish mind.
Deliberately asked the cousin, she said that the couple's mobile phone case, couple shoes, couple bracelet, began to pay attention to their appearance, which is obviously a sign of early love, the mother has not found that it is also a big heart. I have to admire the people who are teachers, in the battle of wits and courage with the children, they have also cultivated a pair of fire eyes.
Adolescent "early love" is invincible
Entering puberty, the hormones are unstable, the child's self-control has not yet matured, can not resist a variety of "temptations", when the parents are afraid of their "early love". But you know what? Adolescent bear baby, "early love" is really invincible!
The research group of the Institute of Sociology of the Shanghai Academy of Social Sciences once conducted a "sexual health" survey for teenagers. The results showed that 10.6% of junior high school students had a love experience and 42.3% of high school students had a love experience.
This set of data is not a small amount, and now children grow up watching all kinds of literary works, film and television dramas, Internet videos, the virtual world is infinitely beautified of "love", what "domineering president fell in love with me", "love you for ten thousand years" and so on, which makes children have inexplicable expectations for love.
So some people advocate that children's "early love" is nothing, and they must be contacted as soon as possible so that they will not be hurt in their feelings. Whenever I see such remarks, I want to fight face to face, and I want to ask him if he understands the child's brain development? I sincerely advise all parents, and if someone tells you "the theory of early love is harmless", you will ask him to get away rounded.
I have always disapproved of early love for children because the harm of love to minors is immeasurable. Especially those girls who do not know how to protect themselves, there are not a few girls who accidentally get pregnant every year, which is a lifetime of life.
Even if you take a step back, you will protect yourself, and I am not in favor of "early love", why? Because the child's attention span is limited, but early love will occupy the child's "mental bandwidth". For example: just like we have a 100M belt, you want to check the information, but someone is partial to this time, you can't even open the web page.
Once the children focus on "early love", other aspects are bound to have no energy to take care of, not to mention learning that has a certain challenging difficulty. I just looked at a girl in the top 3 of the class, because she fell in love for one semester and became the bottom of the class.
Of course, it is not impossible to respect the nature of the child, after all, "blocking is not as good as neglecting", but at least teach the child how to protect himself and give the child a correct view of love
What exactly is the education of adolescent girls?
"Rebellion" is the biggest feature of adolescent children, and children at this stage are really difficult to communicate. Be harsh, the children feel that you are repressed in nature; relax, if you are not careful, you may be tempted to run away.
Preaching has no effect on bear children at this stage. But this period is also the most important period for children's sense of identity.
Psychologist Eriksen believes that the main task of adolescence is to establish a new sense of identity or image in the eyes of others, and his emotional position in the collective.
That is to say, at this stage, children have a obsessive attachment to the "sense of identity". This inspires us in an educational approach: with the help of tools, the child identifies with himself what we are telling him. For example, "The Private Book of Adolescent Girls" and "Mother's Book to Adolescent Girls" are two tailor-made companion books.
Adolescent children will undergo great changes in physiology and psychology, this set of books starts from the girl's physical changes, guiding children step by step to understand the causes of physical, psychological and emotional changes.
In the style of a novel, the topics that parents usually find difficult to talk about are displayed in front of the children one by one in the most acceptable way for the children. Each article is followed by a "mother whisper", telling the daughter in the tone of a person who has come over that all this mother has experienced, and you don't have to be afraid, you don't have to be nervous.
Not only that, but this set of books is also a manual for young girls. For example, "what to do if you receive a love letter", "The new male teacher is so handsome", "I secretly like a boy", the questions that girls want to ask and are embarrassed to ask, you can find answers here.
Sometimes the problem that has plagued us for a long time, the high person just needs to click and dial it. The same is true of the growth of children, many adolescent girls refuse to communicate with their parents, at this time, if someone can go inside to give some advice, it will definitely benefit her for life.
Contemporary teenagers are becoming more and more open to the concept of heterosexual interaction, and I sincerely recommend that parents give this set of youth instruction manuals to girls.
【Wait for the wind to come】All 2 books given by mothers to their adolescent daughters + private book micro-shop for adolescent girls
32.00
After all, it is sometimes more important for girls to know the bottom line, what can and cannot be done, than boys.