On weekends the female colleague asked me to go hiking, I was on and she was down. When I climbed to the upper waist, I saw that the female colleague's cheeks were slightly flushed! Red, small mouth exhale. It's like being tired. I looked at her and said, "Or not."

On weekends the female colleague asked me to go hiking, I was on and she was down.

When I climbed to the upper waist, I saw that the female colleague's cheeks were slightly flushed! Red, small mouth exhale. It's like being tired.

I looked at her and said, "If I don't go up, you'll wait below, and I'll go up and come down for a while. ”

Unexpectedly, she suddenly listened to the bubbling and went down the mountain with an unhappy face. I was stunned and wondered, how did I mess with her?

1. When I got divorced, I asked my husband to take me out of the door again as he had carried me home. He did not object and carried me downstairs as I said. When he was about to break up, his face was not very good, and he only said two words: precious. Just these two words made me feel that he actually loved me. I never fell in love again and looked forward to getting back together until his friend told me he was tired that day and said... It's heavy!

2, I have a small shop, specializing in men's products, from the opening to the present has been profit and loss, recently I really can't stand it, I look for girlfriends to complain. The girlfriend smiled and said: It is the wrong way for you to sell, so let's go to travel for a while, and I will help you take care of the small shop business! I just went out to play for a few days, my girlfriend called me to let me hurry up, the things in the store are all sold out of stock, how to sell ah...

3. The collector's edition of Wuliangye, which my father bought with private money, was stolen and sold for 1,000 yuan by me.

Dad was so angry when he found out that he beat me up.

I said grievously: Dad, I am not your own child at all, and you don't care about me.

Dad: Nonsense, do you know how much I love you?

Me: How much love?

Dad: Son, you never know how much Dad loves you, you made a mistake when you were a child, and I took half a day off to come home and beat you.

4. When I came home from work today to play games, my daughter-in-law asked, "Don't you have to play games all day?" ”

Me: "Never disturb a man playing games, just like men can't hit women!" ”

As a result, the daughter-in-law came over and slapped her, and asked me not to ask her why, as if she had dug a pit and jumped into it! How do friends break? The daughter-in-law is still fighting...

5, I told the nurse: pretending to be a girlfriend once thirty thousand, she agreed, the result was less than three months she angrily ran over to me and asked, how long are you thirty thousand times, it will not be a lifetime. I asked her how long you thought it would be appropriate, and she smiled and said, "As long as you don't want the jewelry your parents gave me back, it will take as long as possible." It feels like it's going to be a long-term plan!

6, the neighbors are fighting, I help to pull the fight. When I went to their house, I saw the woman taking a steel scoop to beat the man, and she snatched it up decisively. The woman yelled at me: Give it to me! The man yelled at me: Give it to her, let her fight! Seeing that the two of them were very unanimous, they handed the water scoop to the woman. They were stunned. After a few seconds of pause, bells ~ bells ~ bags at the end of the man' head.

7, yesterday saw the boss is shopping with a woman, so I want to go over and shoot the boss ass: "Oh, isn't this the boss?" Presumably this must be a sister-in-law! I have long heard that my sister-in-law looks like a sinking fish and a goose, and today I saw that it was really worthy of the name, boss, you are really blessed! In fact, I personally feel that this horse ass shot is very good, after all, a mouthful of boss shouting, and praising his daughter-in-law is beautiful, he must be very happy in his heart. But unexpectedly, the boss reached out and dragged me over and whispered, "What are you talking about, Lao Tzu came to go on a blind date today!" ”

8, Lao Wang drank too much, called a substitute driver, sat on the car, took off the sunglasses,

Lao Wang said in horror, "Is it you?" ”

The corner of his mouth rose and sneered, "Yes, I am." ”

Lao Wang curled up and said, "Can you spare me once?" ”

The substitute driver started the car and said, "How can I let it go?"

I advise you, you better fasten your seat belt, this time the co-pilot can not brake for you to step on, understand? Coach Wang!!! ”

9, female colleagues in the countryside in childhood grandmother parents grew up, was bitten by rats, so especially afraid of cats. It was already 11 o'clock at night after work today, and the female colleague met a cat on the road. The female colleague was frightened and quickly called me. I comforted: This is a good solution, the cat nose is more sensitive than the human nose, but the cat's ears are also very sensitive, you see that a person can't stand your singing, that cat must also be... After hanging up the phone, the female colleague sang affectionately to the cat: I am a horse from the north... The wolf word has not yet been exported, and the cat is so frightened that it farts and runs away.

10, I heard my office colleagues say that Liu Juan's supermarket is very good, so I am ready to go over and buy two watermelons.

Picked two large hugs past a weighing, the boss skillfully shouted: "A watermelon 8 8, another watermelon is also 8 8, two watermelons 16 6, charge you 20, find you 4 4...

I think I understand why her supermarket is so hot...

11, I cut millet spicy in the kitchen, ready to make homemade chopped pepper, my husband was in the living room, talking to me about work, I coped with him a few words. The husband said a little dissatisfied: Hey, hey, I talk to you, can you be a little more enthusiastic and hot? So angry that I put down the kitchen knife and slapped him in the face with the hand that had just taken the pepper: How? Passionate enough, hot enough, right?