1. The husband's pension is more than 10,000 a month, and he has saved for three years. Yesterday, the old man took 3 passbooks to the bank and said: The password 991206, and I will get 3 million funds. cabinet

1. The husband's pension is more than 10,000 a month, and he has saved for three years. Yesterday, the old man took 3 passbooks to the bank and said: The password 991206, and I will get 3 million funds. The teller was very happy and immediately took out 3 million yuan and bought the fund. After 10 minutes, the teller said: Sir, I have bought you 3 million funds. The old man was dumbfounded on the spot: What fund? I'm asking you to withdraw your money and buy a house for my son!

2. Once asked my mother: If you turn back the clock, will you still choose to marry your father? Mom pondered for a moment and said: Yes! At that time, I was very touched, although my mother often complained about my father's small problems, but my mother still loved my father deeply! Then my mother said to me: Why don't you ask, if you turn back the clock, will I still give birth to you?

3. Kirito, who likes to take advantage, is invited to a tea party with a lot of desserts on the table. The owner of the tea party said to Kirito: Sir, eat more! Kirito smiled and said, "Thank you!" No, I've actually eaten a lot. The host said enthusiastically: Then you can pack some candy in your pocket and eat it on the way home! Kirito said modestly: Thank you! No, my pockets are full.

4, bought a new iPhone 11, at home comfortably lying down and shaking. The first time I shook a beautiful woman, the head of which was a picture of herself. Wearing a white hat and a white coat, I asked, "Beauty, are you a doctor or a nurse?" Beauty replied in seconds: "None of them." I was a little curious: "Neither, so why are you wearing a white outfit?" Beauty: "Because I'm a steamed bun seller!" ”"

5, the old man has a serious cold, afraid of infection of the newborn brother-in-law to buy a mask. As a result, when the pharmacy was gone, the old man came to the hardware store and asked: "Boss, do you have a mask?" The clerk said, "No!! The next day, the old man came and asked, "Boss, do you have a mask?" The clerk said, "No!! On the third day, the old man came and asked again: "Boss, do you have a mask?" The clerk said, "If you ask me if I have a mask again, I'll nail your mouth with a screwdriver!" On the fourth day, the old man came and asked again: "Boss, do you have a screwdriver?" The clerk said, "No!! The old man said, "That boss, do you have a mask?" ”

6, girlfriends and boyfriends together for more than three months, quarrels are particularly fierce, greasy when crooked and especially greasy. Today they quarreled again and came to me to complain, saying that this time they would never forgive her boyfriend again! After crying for half a day, my girlfriend pulled me up and said: Hungry, I invite you to eat the buffet! Just arrived at the door of the buffet, the girlfriend took out a phone call and took out eight dollars from the bag: there is a box lunch seller in front, you can eat it yourself! Me: Why are you going? I saw this product with a face of surname and said: My boyfriend called and said that he invited me to eat Western food! I'll go......

7. Today, my girlfriend called and said that her husband had an accident! Let me hurry up and make a trip! When I rushed to his house, I saw her and her husband crying with headaches, and I exhaled a rough breath and said, Isn't it good? It was a shock! The girlfriend cried and said that the new mobile phone she had just bought for her husband was lost by him and did not know whether it was really lost! I subconsciously hid my phone!

8. The brother-in-law has been poor in academic performance, does not listen carefully to lectures in class, and communicates with classmates. Sometimes a few buddies in the class also skip class and go out to the Internet, and they have no intention of studying. The brother-in-law took the final exam and took the penultimate brother in the class, and the mother-in-law lost her temper after seeing it, saying that you stupid child, this life is like this, there will be no chance! After the old man heard it, he immediately said to his mother: Children should be encouraged, not scolded! Then he said to his brother-in-law in a serious tone: Son, you have been like this in this life, and you must work hard in the next life!

9, the sister-in-law is on summer vacation, I went to the airport today to pick her up home, by the way to Haidilao to eat a hot pot. On the way, I had a hot conversation with my sister-in-law, and suddenly I received a call from my wife. The wife said coldly: Go to divorce tomorrow, the children belong to you, the car and the house belong to me!! I couldn't believe it and was sure again..are you sure you want a divorce?? Wife: I'm 100% sure!! I said firmly: I will not divorce you!! The wife laughed out loud: I was joking with you, in fact, I hit a Maybach, and the other party wanted me to lose 2.2 million, so is it not so uncomfortable for you to listen to it now???

10. Fang Zhan was forty-eight years old after he was still vulgar, and the matchmaker brought 100 photos of girls for him to choose. Matchmaker: "What's going on here?" Fang Zhan: "The legs are too long, waste pants." Matchmaker: "What about this?" Fang Zhan: "The fingers are too long, and the gloves are wasted." Matchmaker: "What about this?" Fang Zhan: "The face is too long, a waste of masks." Matchmaker: "What about this?" Fang Zhan: "The hair is too long, waste of shampoo." Matchmaker: "What about this?" Fang Zhan: "Well, this is not bad." So Fang Zhan and the girl began to associate. On this day, the matchmaker met Fang Zhan and asked him: "I heard that you are looking for a girlfriend, when will you get married?" Fang Zhan: "What is the marriage?" Divided! Matchmaker: "Why?" Fang Zhan: "I mentioned it, after the interaction, I found that her toes were too long." Matchmaker: "What are the toes?" Fang Zhan: "Waste socks!" ”

11. A simple man who never has the courage to confess to the woman he loves. And she knew and liked him so well that she often created opportunities for him to show his love. But he never took advantage of the opportunities she had created. One night he sat with her on a park bench, and as usual he was speechless. She couldn't help but create another opportunity to hint to him: "It is said that one arm of a man is the same length as a woman's waistline, do you believe it?" "Is it true?" He replied. "It's a pity I didn't bring a rope to measure it."?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #