February 9, 2022 Reading Notes Title: "Introvert Advantage" by Marti Olsen Laney Reading Progress:

February 9, 2022

Read the notes

Title: The Introvert Advantage

By Marti Olsen Laney

Reading Progress: Chapters 5 and 6

Reading time: 45 minutes

Reading Insights:

Raising children with different personalities

Everyone's personality is different, and every child's personality is different.

Although the book says that personality is divided into introverted personality and extrovert personality, the author vividly introduces the characteristics of this personality: introversion and extroversion are at opposite ends of the energy continuum, and our position on the continuum indicates the way we obtain the energy of life.

That is to say, although it is possible to define whether each child is introverted or extroverted, it may also be different due to the position of their personality on the continuum.

This shows that it is important as a parent to understand such a personality type of child by observing their own children.

This also lets those confused parents know why the education methods that are suitable for other people's children do not work on their own children.

Because of the innate temperament of each child, it is determined whether they are suitable for learning in an image way or in a specific way.

For introverted children, give them plenty of private time, space, and feedback time to guide them to communicate and rest.

For extroverted children, give them enough to communicate, they need your advice and encouragement, and also teach them to relax appropriately.

When the temperament of parents is different from that of children, it is more necessary for parents to understand their children and appreciate their children, rather than criticizing or ignoring their needs because of differences.

Educating children is very important, according to the characteristics of the child's temperament to educate, can make parents less detours, easier.

Insist on reading, keep learning, always have gains.

Golden Sentence Sharing:

★ We are always worried about the future of the child, but we ignore his present. —Sisiah Tauchel

★ "Oreo Feedback Method": First positive feedback, then negative feedback, and finally back to positive feedback. Feedback can energize extroverted children again.

★ In the eyes of the child, the wonders of the world are not seven, but seven million.

—Walter Streitif

★ Children are not things to be shaped, but people to be revealed.

--Jess Lyle

★ Children are like unscreen cement, and whatever falls on them will leave a mark.

--Heim Ginort

Resolved issue

1. Through the standards provided in the book, look at the actual situation

See if your child is an introvert or an extrovert?

I have two children, one is a very typical introvert and the other is in the middle of introvert and extrovert.

2. How should I raise an introverted child?

(1) Arrange some private time for introverted children

(2) Provide a private space for introverted children

(3) Allow time for introverted children to think

3. How should I raise an extroverted child?

(1) Extroverted children need to communicate and make sure someone is talking

(2) Give feedback

(3) Encourage them to think as they speak

(4) Stay active and relax

4) Why do social gatherings make introverts feel anxious?

Group socializing requires a lot of effort.

First, going out consumes energy and prepares mentally, as introverts tend to think ahead and then imagine what they will look like afterwards: they will eventually feel tired, uncomfortable, or anxious.

Second, most introverts need to gradually integrate into the social environment to accommodate a variety of stimuli. Noise, colors, music, new faces, old faces, food, drink, smells, everything can overload the brain.

In the end, just being surrounded by many people — friends and enemies alike — drains the energy of introverts.

5. What are the common problems in social networking? How do introverts respond?

(1) Conversation in social interactions

How introverts respond:

a. One-on-one talk about topics of interest

b, listen more and talk less, pause before suddenly joining Tan wo

(2) Thinking and preparing before the gathering

a, whether to go to social gatherings, you can decide by thinking about some specific issues by yourself, you don't have to be responsive.

b. Subtly and appropriately decline the invitation

c, maintain physical strength and energy before going out to party

(3) How to organize a good party

How introverts cope: Master the timing, style, content, games, etc. of the party at their own pace and interests.

6. Brief overview of 7 social strategies.

Strategy One: Anemone Strategy

Refers to a large gathering, introverts at their own pace, chatting with others for a while, resting for a while, and then chatting

Strategy two: Pretend strategy

It means that you have to pretend to know what you are going to do. Of course, you have to believe that you can do it. Keep pretending until you reach your goal, which is another way for you to accomplish your task.

Strategy Three: Prop Strategy

If you choose the right props, the props you choose will appeal to those you want to talk to.

Strategy Four: Friendly expressions

Smile with your eyes, not just your mouth.

Strategy Five: Small talk is not casual

Small talk consists of four stages: starting, bearing, turning, and closing. Strategy Six: Emergency Measures

Master some emergency measures to use when there is an accident at a party, or when you are depressed or anxious.

Strategy Seven: "Groundhog Day"

After the party, no matter what happens, reduce negative and critical thoughts, and next, turn your attention to the pleasant things.