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In real life, people often see these situations:
Some children are lively and clever at home, and once they come to a new environment to contact strangers, they will become timid, shy, dull and clumsy;
Some children play alone in kindergartens, talk to themselves, and seem very unsociable;
Some children are just the opposite, and they are strong in their dealings with people, running amok and domineering, and appear to be arrogant and domineering;
Some children meet acquaintances, even if the adult forces them to greet people politely, he remains silent and tries to avoid them.
Children's communication skills have a great impact on their learning and life. If the child cannot take the initiative to interact with his peers, cannot get along with his peers, and does not dare to go to the teacher to reflect or seek help when he encounters problems, the result is that there are no new friends.
In this way, they will feel lonely and depressed, their interest in learning will be greatly reduced, and the attractiveness of the school will disappear.
Similarly, children's good communication skills can also have a very good impact on the child's development.
A child's good communication skills complement and influence his learning ability, speech development, intelligent activities, emotional responses, and social behaviors.
Good communication skills need to be cultivated from the following three aspects.
01
Language proficiency
Language skills include the ability to understand others and the ability to express oneself.
Correctly accept and understand the words of others
Parents should consciously cultivate their children's comprehension skills. For example, you can talk to your child more often in your leisure time, try not to use overlapping words, such as "rice", "awareness", etc., and the language should be gradually refined and complex.
When reading a story, do not stop to explain every time the child asks, let the child experience the sentences and vocabulary after listening to the whole text.
Let the child talk more about what they have seen and heard, and learn to express a thing in a variety of ways, such as "Dad, Mom and I are at home", "This is my home, my father, mom and I", "This beautiful house is my home", etc., so that children can improve their comprehension ability and language ability.
In terms of helping children understand language, assigning more tasks is also a good form of promoting children's level.
Parents can assign a task every day, gradually transitioning from a task with one condition to a task with multiple instructions, laying a good foundation for the child's understanding of language, especially task language, after entering primary school.
For example, please go get a small stool; please go get a high stool; please go to the kitchen balcony and get a small stool.
Express your thoughts and desires appropriately
To communicate, you need to rely on effective language communication. Children 3, 6 years old and 8, 9 years old is an important period of language development, parents in addition to paying more attention to the cultivation of children's good language comprehension ability, but also pay attention to the cultivation of children's excellent language expression ability.
Several indicators to judge the child's language expression ability are: loud voice, natural attitude, appropriate wording, and ability to express their meaning more completely and coherently.
For children who are about to enter primary school, in order to learn to express their wishes and emotions appropriately, they should mainly be manned from the following aspects.
Express your thoughts and wishes accurately:
How can I improve my child's verbal skills?
First, one of the main principles to follow is "communicate with children on an equal footing." Ask the child more questions, and let the child express it himself;
When the child's expression is difficult, ask questions from another angle, or give some tips, and avoid rude interruptions or "doing the work" by the parents.
From the child's point of view, follow the good examples, and their ability to finely process and organize speech will gradually improve.
Learning "effective and accurate" expression and organizing your own thinking is a brain-draining task after all, so after parents have achieved "equal communication", they also need to create a situation where children are willing to "express". For preschoolers, play situations are the best choice.
Generously accept and politely reject others:
After children learn to correctly understand the words of others, they must also learn to accept generously and politely reject others.
When other children want to play with a toy or game with your child, teach your child to be generous with others: "Okay, let's play together!" ”
When children are unwilling to play with others or are unwilling to grant others' requests or requests, they tend to simply reject others and even take things in their arms and run away. Parents should teach their children to politely reject others.
When children are just beginning to form themselves and do not yet know how to communicate with others, the enlightenment of parents is very important. Parents should teach their children to abide by order and adjust themselves in communication, so as to lay the foundation for the development of children's interpersonal intelligence in the future.
Acknowledgements and Apologies:
Parents should teach their children from a young age: others have helped them, they should say "thank you" out loud, they accidentally caused trouble for others and said "I'm sorry".
To make children polite, parents must first respect their children.
If parents ask their children to bring newspapers, politely say, "Please help me bring today's newspaper." When the child is done with this, say, "Thank you, my little darling!" "This is a good example for children in terms of language behavior."
In fact, treating children with courtesy does not lose the dignity of parents, but increases the respect of children for their parents.
Respect for your child should be filled with daily life, and you can create a good atmosphere of respect for others in your life.
When you ask your child to help with something to do, always say "Please..." without using blunt commands. If your child finishes doing something, say "thank you." There is something you can discuss with your child.
02
Master the skills and rules of communication
Know how to be polite, can cooperate, and learn to communicate and share
Generally speaking, people like children who are cheerful and smiling and greeting people, and children who are polite, and everyone is happy to talk to him more.
If you hide when you meet an acquaintance, or if you don't care about greeting someone, such a child will give people a bad impression, and others will not like to contact him. In this way, his personality will become more and more withdrawn.
Rules-abiding children are often welcomed by their peers. Parents should teach their children to consider the suggestions and opinions of their friends, and when they disagree, they should consult with each other; when they play games, they should abide by the rules and do not play badly if they lose; when they want to play with others, they should politely make requests: Are we okay to play together? Can we exchange toys?
Many children who are rejected by their peers are because they do not understand the rules of communication. For example, when participating in group games, he does not understand the rules of "queuing"; when a child discusses which activity to do, he does not know "consultation" and "minority obeys the majority", and will only do it according to his own ideas.
To this end, parents may wish to formulate clear rules of communication in their daily lives and require their children to comply. Over time, the social rules that the child has learned, after he has gradually internalized and formed a solid ability, can be freely applied to the interaction with his peers.
Use of posture and auxiliary languages
Human body movements, expressions, etc. also convey a certain meaning. In daily life, children should always understand the different meanings of different postures, as well as the expression of different feelings and different postures. Such as: friendly welcome, good friends meet, lean in to listen, interested, bored, uncertain, doubtful, stunned...
In addition, there are auxiliary languages expressed through the movement of the hand, such as here, there, this, that, come, walk away, go, refuse, welcome, quiet, and the expression of 1 and 10 numbers.
Resolution of contradictions and conflicts
Parents need to understand that conflicts in children are not all bad. Through conflict, they can understand the importance of mutual respect and mutual humility, and gradually learn to restrain themselves, control themselves, and solve problems in a friendly way.
We often see that after friction and conflict between children, they will solve it in their own way, and after a while they will be reconciled as before.
Therefore, when there are contradictions and conflicts between children, under the premise of no excessive behavior, parents are best to be a "bystander" first, rather than rushing to be a "referee", be good at being an effective "guide", try to exert the initiative of children, and let them solve it by themselves.
If the children cannot solve the problem for a while, parents can appropriately guide them to learn to think objectively from the perspective of the other party, or give up their own opinions to obey the other party, or learn to persuade the other party to make themselves acceptable to others, or teach the children to learn to "merge the two into one", and organically synthesize the opinions of both sides to achieve a happy result.
03
Interact with people of different ages, genders, and countries
Once in primary school, children will come into contact with a variety of people: students in a school may come from different social classes, or even different countries.
Therefore, teaching children how to deal with different people before entering school will lay a solid foundation for children to adapt to complex social environments later.
But this foundation requires parents to be patient and meticulous in giving guidance. In the face of different groups of people, parents should teach their children some basic communication principles. Such as respect for others, not humble and unobtrusive.
END
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