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Although love is not the whole of life, if a woman has not experienced the infiltration of love, it is inevitable that she will regret it.
But falling in love is for happiness, not for abuse, so to talk about it is to talk to men who really believe in love, most of whom are under the age of 26.
Men in the pure love stage, sometimes really stupid and naïve, in love with a girl is willing to pay for its lungs, although this hot feeling is usually difficult to have a satisfactory result, or will make the girl fascinated, many years later to recall people feel warm, if you have not experienced this kind of love, it is a regret in life.
But do not talk to men over the age of 26 about pure love, men at this stage usually experience the baptism of society, have been relatively socialized, they treat feelings, pros and cons of the consideration is far greater than whether they like.
First, they are very sober about marriage
Girls who fall in love with men at this stage have left the protection of their parents and have become financially independent, so it is easy to have the idea of wanting to get married.
But relative to this stage of boys have just begun to accumulate resources, marriage means being bound by the family and losing many opportunities to climb upwards.
They see this very thoroughly, marriage is the reconciliation of the interests of both parties on the basis of not talking about feelings, and it is through the binding relationship to share risks and share benefits.
Therefore, they hope to maximize their own interests through alliance with each other and achieve balance under mutual game.
Men at this stage are able to separate their feelings and sex from marriage. Many girls wonder, why does he say he loves me but doesn't want to marry me?
Quite simply because marrying you won't maximize the benefits for him. Men don't give up their freedom easily when they don't get the resources they really want.
Marriage is inherently a very realistic product, and men generally do better than women in purely rational thinking. Girls don't complain, whether it's love or interests, as long as you see clearly, the power of choice lies with you
Second, pay more attention to the benefits and losses
Men over the age of 26 value the gains and losses above all else, which is mainly due to the social value of success and failure, and to some extent men are forced to do it.
Of course, understanding men does not mean subservience to men, and women also need to choose under the condition of clear pros and cons.
A man over the age of 26 will not choose a person who is loyal to himself like a woman when building a relationship between men and women, but even if they already have a spouse, if there is a greater interest, he will give up the feelings he already has.
They have a lower sense of morality about feelings, and in their established values they can be exchanged.
Falling in love with men at this age can easily be hurt. They don't meet a partner who makes them completely satisfied, but they also don't refuse to be with someone who isn't so satisfied.
Their principle is that nothing is better than nothing, and they maintain such a relationship while looking for a better spouse, or to put it bluntly, riding a donkey to find a horse.
Third, be more sober in the face of trade-offs
Of course, men at this stage are not completely emotionless animals, they will also be addicted and moved, but they can clearly distinguish what is most important in the face of making choices, which is money, profit, and long-term planning.
Feelings are indeed worth attaching to, but life is more realistic, for anyone who has been working hard in real life for a long time, in the face of reality, feelings must be slowed down.
More important than talking about feelings is that Mr. Survive. So in fact, men at this stage are not completely emotionless, but they are not yet capable of juggling feelings and interests.
This is especially true for many men who do not have a high starting point in themselves, who must learn to use the existing switch to obtain more resources.
In some cases, men not only materialize women, they even materialize themselves, as long as the benefits are in place, they do not reject themselves as commodities in exchange for value, quantitative profit.
So if you are in love with a man of this age, you must think clearly, do you want to be drunk today? Or do you want a brave man to choose a safe island with a broken wrist?
Men over the age of 26 are very realistic, but you can't be confused, after all, they are all adults, rationally responsible for their own actions, no matter which way they choose, as long as you feel that the other party is worthwhile, there is actually nothing wrong with it.
But if you want to pursue love and persuade you to think twice, in fact, the best stage of falling in love is in your twenties, at that age you have not seen the cruelty of social competition, and believe in fairy tales.
Willing to do whatever it takes for love, the most important thing is that the cost of trial and error is low, even if there is no result in the end, it will not have much impact on life.
But at the age of 26 or older, it is not enough, and taking the wrong step may be in vain, and most people simply cannot afford to lose.
So I hope that female friends understand what age to do what? When you are eighteen or nineteen, you will go to talk about love wantonly, and when you are twenty-seven or eight, you should fight hard for your career, don't talk about it when you should be in love, and don't be pragmatic when you should be pragmatic, and make a mess of life.
- The End -
Author | Tommy
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
参考资料：Bruk, A., Scholl, S. G., & Bless, H. (2018). Beautiful mess effect: Self–other differences in evaluation of showing vulnerability. Journal of personality and social psychology, 115(2), 192-205