In marriage, why does the wife pay more, the man will not be moved? There is only one reason

Chatting with a friend some time ago, he said that a big brother in his hometown obviously paid a lot of money at home, but the big brother didn't seem to be grateful at all, and even often quarreled with his wife.

I believe that many married female friends have a very strong say in this topic, they always pay for the family, pay for the children, but in the end it seems that they have not gotten anything.

What's more, not only will they not appreciate your kindness, but they will also dislike and resent your efforts.

Brushing the short video again, I saw a real story: a couple playing in the park, the wife took great care of her husband, not only intimately helped him sort out his clothes, but also prepared a thermos cup for him when he went out.

Because the weather was too hot, seeing the beads of sweat on her husband's face, the wife trotted all the way to the store to buy ice water for her husband, and also bought some snacks.

In short, in this process, the wife is taking care of her husband meticulously, but the husband's face has never been expressionless, not even a smile or a word of gratitude.

Many netizens below began to comment and complain about various times, saying that this husband is a wooden man and machismo.

Let's imagine, what would we do if we encountered this situation?

Most of them probably won't treat their wives like this husband, after all, two people need respect and understanding to get along, and they will have happiness when they pay for each other at the same time.

And reality is often too contrasting with what we think, because some people are born like this, no matter how you treat him, as long as he doesn't like you in his heart, he will even look at what you do with colored glasses.

I remember going back to my hometown for the New Year, and a cousin in my hometown is such a person.

He and his wife met when they were working, and after taking the woman home for the New Year, they scrawled a simple wedding, and then the two lived together.

At the beginning, my cousin was still good to girls, and he would listen to girls' opinions on anything. But after a while, it was obvious to me that my cousin's attitude towards others had changed dramatically.

After learning about the situation of the cousin from the elders, I found that it was the cousin's work that was not going well, and he did not earn any money all year round, but he had to use it to support his family.

Since she got married, my cousin has not made any more money, but has taken care of the elderly and children at home and concentrated on housework.

If according to tradition, the male protagonist is outside and the female protagonist is inside, such a family should be very harmonious.

But everyone forgets that life now is completely different from before, if there is no income, the family will fall into the distress of three meals a day.

Because I came from my hometown in the countryside, I have seen many such families.

Marriages are very happy in the beginning, and even if the family only eats one dish, there will be happiness. But this happiness lasts too short, and if the problem of chai rice oil, salt, sauce and vinegar tea cannot be solved in a specific period of time, there will be various contradictions next.

With the fermentation and escalation of contradictions, the last thing to suffer is marriage.

Especially those men who have no ability, but have an unforgiving mouth, this kind of man is the most headache.

For example, if you are angry outside, you will spread the outside gas to the home, and the last person to be injured is your wife.

Let's go back to the topic we talked about at the beginning, and the man in the video is the most typical example.

No matter what his wife does, he has something to complain about. And the most enviable thing is that no matter what he says, his wife will not be angry with him, as if she has become accustomed to his nagging.

Judging from the emotional experience of many friends around you, "the heat and cold of marriage depends on the temperature of your speech to your partner." ”

Whether a marriage is happy or not has a lot to do with the way you talk and the attitude. It is true that in intimate relationships, the party who pays more will always have grievances and always want to complain.

But too many complaints and complaints will not be exchanged for their gratitude, but will erase all your efforts.

As long as we are careful, we will find that many marriages have the same status quo: many hard-working women, their mouths are relatively broken, and they like all kinds of nagging and complaining.

This kind of woman obviously plays an important role in the family, but because she likes all kinds of complaints and nagging, she can't get the recognition and gratitude of her family members.

From a psychological point of view, this is a flattering personality plus aggressive behavior.

This type of woman's care for her husband, her children, and her family all hope to express her love for family members in this way. Unfortunately, they express their love in the wrong way.

Marriage is not about the more love you give, the more you get.

I don't know if you have found that when you try to give, if you don't get back, you will start to become dissatisfied, angry, and resentful, so that you can verbally attack and constantly complain.

From a marriage perspective, this situation clearly comes from an unbalanced giving between family members, which is a manifestation of a psychological imbalance.

Because in marriage, all the giving and love need to be seen, all need to be cared for and loved.

So that's why many women have been paying for the family, paying for their husbands, but not getting touched by their husbands.

Xi Murong once said such a sentence: Marriage is not only two people face to face from now on, marriage should be two people holding hands to face the world together.

Marriage is a two-person practice, and it requires both parties to face the chickens and pieces of life and the ups and downs of the world. Instead of, it has always been a person's effort, a person's lonely struggle.

A good marriage can hurt each other.

He sees your efforts and understands your hard work; you also feel his exhaustion and share his stress.

So, what I want to say is that when women in marriage complain, cry, and complain, they actually just want to be listened to and understood by their partners, and want their efforts to be seen and recognized.