As the saying goes: a good word is warm in three winters, and a bad word hurts people in June. No one can underestimate the power of language. It is a double-edged sword, it can warm people's hearts, urge people to forge ahead, and bring endless strength to people; but sometimes it is a sharp knife, fiercely inserted into people's hearts, making people miserable. Therefore, in the process of people's interaction, we must pay attention to careful language, even if it is the communication between parents and children.
Why is there a parent-child confrontation in some families? In the final analysis, parents will not speak well, and the child's self-esteem has been greatly hurt. I have seen such a scene, at the door of the school kindergarten class, I saw a father say loudly to the child, why do you love bedwetting so much, the next time you wet the bed, you will wash the sheets yourself! This short few words of dad caused the whole class of children to laugh, and the other children knew their little secrets, and the children's faces were flushed, looking embarrassed and helpless. It is because of these few words of the father that the child's self-esteem is hurt and becomes the laughing stock of the whole class. Children's inferiority complex is accompanied by the continuous growth of children.
Parents inadvertently a word, will make the child feel very inferior, thus affecting the child's life, in order to let the child grow up healthy and happy, as a qualified parent, the mouth is with a "zipper". If parents always say these few words, then parents need to pay attention and pull the "zipper" on their mouths at any time.
Language Minefield One: Everything is for your own good
I believe that in real life, many parents have said such a sentence to their children: "I have done so much, all for your own good." At first, parents said this so that their children could be more motivated and more motivated. But gradually the parents' words have changed their taste, parents always say to their children "everything is for your own good", regardless of the child's feelings to the child to report a variety of tutoring classes and interest classes, the child's life is arranged quite full, once the child appears to resist and resist the emotions, parents will hang this sentence on their lips, forcing the child to compromise. As everyone knows, such words from parents will make children fall deeply into fear, depression and irritability. One day, children will have a big emotional outburst, they want to escape from this home, to escape from their parents who make them afraid and depressed.
I believe that parents all over the world love their children very much, but those parents control their children under the banner of "everything is for your own good", which will only push their children farther and farther, so parents really love their children, they must consider their children's feelings, when parents want to say this sentence, they must use the "zipper" to pull their mouths up.
Language Minefield Two: If you don't obey, I won't want you
When the child is not obedient, the parents will first patiently educate the child, if the child is still disobedient, then the parents will take out the "killer skill", the parents will blurt out: "You are no longer obedient, I will not want you", I believe that the child will become obedient when he hears this sentence. In the eyes of parents, children are only a part of life, but in the eyes of children, parents are the whole of life, if parents say "I don't want you", children will collapse and will be helpless, gradually become insecure, suffering from loss and loss, then the child's trust in parents is greatly reduced, so parents do not easily say this sentence to their children. But when parents want to say this sentence, they must use a "zipper" to close their mouths.
Language Minefield Three: You see how good people are
Comparison is everywhere in real life. There is a saying that is very suitable for those parents who love to compare: there is a kind of love called love and can not be, there is a kind of hate called hate iron is not steel. Love can not be a parent who looks at other people's children so sensibly and excellent, but in the end it is not their own children; hate is not steel, because children cannot be as good as other people's children, even if they are educated, they still have not made some substantive changes.
In fact, in the heart of every child, eager to get the encouragement and support and recognition of parents, but when parents say the advantages and strengths of other children in front of their children, they will let the child's self-esteem and self-confidence be hurt, feel that they are not excellent, never better than others, they will always live in the shadow of excellent children, and gradually children will lose the motivation to work hard, then the children will become more and more distant from excellence, and the inferiority character formed by children will also accompany them for a lifetime. Each child is unique, parents should see the advantages of their children, and learn to encourage their children in order to make them confident and sunny. But when parents want to say this sentence, they must use a "zipper" to close their mouths.
A parent who understands children and loves children will not only pay attention to the child's education method, but also pay attention to the expression of language, and the mouth has a "zipper", they know to pay attention to the occasion and take care of the child's emotions and feelings. Have parents learned?
Note: The picture comes from the network and is deleted in infringement