Text/Little Snow Mom
There is no "beaten" childhood is not perfect, for children rarely not beaten by parents, children are mostly more naughty, but also particularly easy to provoke parents to be angry, more or less parents have beaten children, but some are symbolic to do the next look, and some are heavy hands.
So is it appropriate for a child to make a mistake and be punished by "stick education"? My view on this is that stick education is the most direct but most harmful method.
Meng Wa made a mistake and was caught in the bag, and immediately shouted "Mother loves you!" "Trying to awaken maternal love
I have watched a very interesting video on the Internet, "The child is quiet, must be a demon", a Liaoning mother in the living room looking for her son did not find, the heart will cluck a little, feel that something bad happened.
Holding the mobile phone and following the camera to the corner of the home, opening the curtain only to see the son turn his head, immediately shouted "Mother (I) love you, mother loves you", while shouting and fleeing outside.
The mother fixed her eyes on it, it turned out that the son put his father's gloves into a large water bottle to play, so angry that the mother was angry on the spot, and couldn't help but want to beat her son, and the son was already hiding everywhere in the living room, shouting "Mother loves you" while running, trying to awaken mother love.
After watching this video, netizens are also very happy, some netizens said: "My son is also like this, but he should still fight!" Some netizens said: "The sweetest child is beaten lightly!" ”
But in general, this is also a model for mothers and children to get along, the first time the child sees the mother, he knows that he has done wrong and will be punished, afraid of being beaten is just a subconscious reaction, but the heart knows that he is doing wrong, indicating that the mother education is still in place.
Children who are not naughty, making mistakes is the "privilege" of children, but parents must also learn to distinguish, small mistakes can be educated through communication, preaching, and scare, but big mistakes must be severely criticized, so that children recognize their own problems, can not fight must not hit children.
"The depth of love, the cut of responsibility", parents hope that the child can be obedient and sensible, but in the face of the child's mistakes, do not rush to the fire to beat the child, it is easy to beat the child, but the child is played out of the psychological shadow, and even personality problems, that hurts the child's life.
These 3 reactions occur after the child is beaten, and parents must remember to stop
First, when the parents are slightly stricter, the child is frightened to retreat
When I was a child, I had a partner, his father had a very bad temper, every time he made a mistake, it must be a severe beating, once the little friend's family did not take us to his house to play, temporarily his father returned, and now we can remember his frightened eyes and trembling body.
Parents often beat their children, it seems that the children are obedient, but in fact, the child's personality is very harmful, the inner insecurity, feel that it is possible to be beaten anytime and anywhere, see parents are more nervous and uneasy than the harbor of love, in this case, parents are beating the child, will only suppress the child's personality to the extreme.
Children lack of security, personality will become weak and withdrawn, excessive nervous emotions make the brain thinking will become sluggish, especially the pressure of parents, so that children have no confidence, no opinion, it is difficult to harden up in life.
Children and parents should get along naturally, there is play and seriousness, but it should not be a "bird of fright", if this situation occurs, parents must stop in time, and then fight the child's mental health will be a problem.
Second, parents beat their children, and the children do not say a word
Generally, children are beaten, and their hearts are very afraid, basically they are screaming and crying, which means that the children's hearts are afraid. But if when the child is beaten, he does not say a word and does not escape, it means that the child has a grudge in his heart.
The child also has his own small temper, the more you hit him in the heart, the more unconvinced, fierce, disobedient, resentment will slowly accumulate, one day will completely erupt in the future, and that time is also the time when the relationship between you and the child is broken.
I have seen this situation, the father often beats the son, the son has no matter, the mouth often says a sentence is "afraid of what, at most one more beating is!" ", make mistakes and do not recognize their own mistakes, in this case the child is very dangerous, parents must stop.
Third, parents hit their children, and the children have eyes and movements that try to resist
When the child is particularly young, the beating heart is more afraid, the older one, especially in puberty, it is really inappropriate to beat the child, if the child shows strong dissatisfaction after being beaten, and even shows a fierce look, trying to resist, at that time the parent-child relationship has already had a big problem.
Adolescent children are originally rebellious, parents also through the "stick education" not only ineffective, but will intensify the contradiction, so that each other can not communicate completely, children only want to escape from their parents, escape from the original family.
Gentleness and firmness are the most suitable educational methods
Children's education should start from an early age, equivalent to building a house, the foundation is laid at the beginning, how to build a high-rise will not be crooked, from a young age to pay attention to the learning of educational methods, children will not make big mistakes when they grow up.
Gentle and firm educational philosophy, has always been I respect and implemented, gentle refers to the daily and children to get along mode, through communication, companionship, reasoning, to instill some correct ideas and ideas, teach children a lot of truths and methods.
Firmness is the attitude of facing children's mistakes, adhering to principles to help children correct, small mistakes verbal criticism, serious expressions can be frightened, big mistakes are punished, and scientific reprimands are based on the situation. Each child's personality is different, and the growth education problems are different, which requires parents to develop methods according to their own understanding.
But before the last resort, we must not hit the child, I believe that as long as we have more patience in the early stage and set the rules for the child, the child's future growth will become more and more excellent.
I am Xiaoxue mother, a post-90s mother, pay attention to me, and share scientific pregnancy and parenting knowledge every day!