"Filial piety under the stick" is the way many parents educate their children, and many parents feel that when their children are disobedient, they must beat their children, so that children can remember sex for a long time, although it is for the good of their children.
But this way of education is not right, more beatings, may affect the child's life, often beaten and beaten children, 20 years later, may live a different life.
Parent-child educator Li Zixun once said: "Hitting children can only be used as a means of deterring children, not as a means of making children obedient." ”
First, the child's psychological problems
Xiao Hui's mother is a housewife, his father works in the company, his father especially respects stick education, every time Xiao Hui is disobedient, he will beat Xiao Hui, Xiao Hui played at home when he was a child, the money that his father put on the table was missing, his father couldn't help but beat him up, and then his mother told his father that the money was taken by her to buy vegetables, and his father did not apologize to Xiao Hui.
Because of his father's stick education, Xiaohui did become very obedient, this time, Xiaohui did not do well in the exam, his father rushed to Xiaohui's room after the parent-teacher meeting, grabbed the sleeping Xiaohui and gave him a slap, let him get up and copy the test paper a hundred times, and was not allowed to sleep if he could not finish copying.
XiaoHui suppressed tears, got up and copied the scroll, until the next morning, the volume was copied, after this time, Xiaohui's grades have been very good, as long as there is time, he began to study, but Xiaohui's psychology gradually appeared problems, he began to become dislike to talk, do not like to make friends, also do not like to go out, has been staying at home, until the parents found out that something was wrong, took him to see the doctor, the doctor told the parents, the child suffered from major depression.
Children who are often beaten are likely to have serious psychological problems, they will feel that they are not liked by the world, even their parents do not like them, they are not good for them, they will become inferior, not confident, dare not communicate with others for fear that others will not like themselves.
Some children will have a flattering personality, in order to make their parents like themselves, they suppress themselves, constantly please their parents, serious cases, may become depression.
Second, the child may inherit the parents' way of education
Parents are the child's first teacher, if the parents use stick education to educate children, the child is likely to inherit the father's education methods, and later take stick education for their children, and even take violence against their wives, most of the domestic violence men have a bad childhood.
Third, the child takes a detour, affecting the parent-child relationship
Many parents' stick education not only did not play an educational effect, but it was extremely counterproductive, arousing the child's rebellious mood, many children deliberately worked against their parents, took a detour, many misguided children, parents said that the most regret is not to educate children well, the use of stick education to teach children.
Stick education will also affect the parent-child relationship, friends said that his father often beat him when he was a child, until now, he is not willing to talk to his father, nor is he willing to wear his wife and children home, and the relationship with his father is cold, no parent does not love their children, because the way of education is not right, the way of loving children is not right, affecting the parent-child relationship, how can not be crossed.
What should parents do to educate their children?
Stick education is not OK, we must use scientific methods to educate children, to communicate with children, to give children reason, when children do not test well, we must encourage children, not beating, children make mistakes, to give children reason, not beating.
Parents are the most important people for children, to often accompany children, parental companionship is more important than any toy, to often accompany children, so that children feel the love of parents.
Parents' education is very important for children, parents should learn to correctly educate their children, cultivate children, and achieve children with love.