#情感 #
We all know that it is natural for parents to love their children, but some parents are really too fond of their children, even if the children have reached adulthood, have married and started a family, and become parents, they will not let go, and even want to manage their children for a lifetime.
However, parents cannot accompany their children for a lifetime, so unlimited doting and help for children can only eventually become an obstacle to their children's growth path, and even make them not understand what responsibilities they have to assume in marriage. And parents will eventually grow old, and when they can't help their children, they will only be complained by their spoiled children.
Therefore, parents and children really get along, and they must also learn to measure, when to help, when to educate, when to let go, this is something that parents should consider. And when children have their own families, they must learn to be independent, otherwise parents can only regret not being able to help themselves after they can no longer help.
Netizen Li Ping is a person who has become a mother-in-law, but because she is not at ease with her children, Li Ping only wants to help her son and daughter-in-law, but in the end she makes herself very tired, and after finding out that her son and daughter-in-law have become accustomed to doing nothing, Li Ping understands three truths. Let's take a look at her story.
Leaving his son's house
Li Ping is 60 years old today, her husband died of illness three years ago, Li Ping did not want to trouble her son, so she has been living alone in her hometown. But after all, she is her only child, Li Ping has been paying attention to the lives of her son and daughter-in-law until her daughter-in-law is pregnant.
Li Ping can no longer sit still, thinking that her son and daughter-in-law are busy at work, and the children in her daughter-in-law's belly are likely to be affected, after all, this is her first grandson, Li Ping always wants to help her son and daughter-in-law. After thinking about it for several days, Li Ping still called her son, and heard that her mother wanted to help share the housework, and Kang Hang agreed.
But because Kang Hang and his wife have to go to work, So Li Ping can only take the train to find them, fortunately, Li Ping's body is still relatively tough, so this is not a problem. When Li Ping arrived at her son's residence, as soon as she opened the door, she saw a messy home, and Li Ping was stunned.
And Kang Hang took his mother's hand as if he had seen a life-saving straw, "Mom, I have been thinking about whether to call you, we really can't hold on, Li Ping is pregnant and has to go to work, I dare not let her do housework, but I have been too busy lately, so the family has become like this." ”
Seeing that her son and daughter-in-law were haggard, Li Ping was also very distressed, so she took the initiative to carry the banner of housework and also undertook the task of cooking for the two children, and Li Ping and Kang Hang also seemed to have finally got rid of something and gradually relaxed.
Although Li Ping felt very tired after doing housework every day, but watching her daughter-in-law's belly grow up day by day, Li Ping felt very relieved, and thought that she would stay until her grandson was born, but she did not expect that there were some things in her hometown, and Li Ping could only go back.
As soon as the matter was done, the grandson was born, but before Li Ping could think it through, Kang Hanghe's phone rang and asked Li Ping to help with the child. Li Ping went happily, but this time she only stayed for three months, and then hurried back to her hometown.
Three more identities
The neighbors around them all feel very confused, after all, now that the grandson also has it, they all think that Li Ping will always stay in the home of her son and daughter-in-law to raise her children for many years, but when she asks About Li Ping again, Li Ping cried and said, "Help your daughter-in-law to take the baby for three months, have three more identities, and also wake up to three truths." ”
It turned out that because of Li Ping's original care, Kang Hang and his wife tasted the sweetness, so after knowing that Li Ping's hometown was done, they almost asked Li Ping to hurry up and take care of the children. Originally coaxing her grandson, Li Ping was very happy, but at the same time, Li Ping also had to undertake the task of serving her daughter-in-law to confinement.
However, the daughter-in-law was originally an only child, the personality was somewhat willful, and after marriage, she converged somewhat, but because of Li Ping's help, she changed back to her nature, and during the confinement period, the daughter-in-law not only did not do anything, but even had great requirements for the environment and food at home.
Li Ping felt that she was directly treated as a sister-in-law for a month, and what made Li Ping feel even more tired was that her daughter-in-law seemed to have completely forgotten that she was a mother, and the child was completely thrown to Li Ping's care, and even at night she had to sleep with Li Ping. Li Ping was tired all day, and at night she was constantly woken up by the child, and her physical condition was getting worse and worse.
However, the daughter-in-law only brought the child back for one day, saying that she was not able to sleep well and sent back to Li Ping's bedroom, Li Ping had no way, after all, she was her grandson, and she was distressed.
However, in addition to the daughter-in-law, even the son did not let Li Ping worry about it, coupled with the love of his son when he was a child, after Li Ping came, his son Kang Hang was also more and more lazy, never helping his mother to share the housework, and always looking for an excuse to ask Li Ping for money. Li Ping knew that they were now under great financial pressure after the birth of their children, but Li Ping's pension was not much, and she had not saved much money in recent years.
In the face of being treated by her son, daughter-in-law as a sister-in-law, a free nanny and a free cash machine, Li Ping gradually couldn't stand it, so she only took three months, and on the pretext of being uncomfortable, she ran back to her hometown for the elderly.
The awakening of the son and daughter-in-law
The people around listened to Li Ping's cries and accused Li Ping's son and daughter-in-law, and Li Ping was also helpless in her heart, but there was nothing she could do. Later, Kang Hang made several phone calls, although he asked Li Ping if his health was better, but Li Ping knew that his son wanted to let him go and help.
At first, Li Ping would still find excuses to perfunctory, and then heard the complaint in her son's tone, Li Ping finally couldn't help it, and said, "Son, my mother is old." ”
Kang Hang on the other end of the phone suddenly froze, and then never asked for anything again, until the grandson was one year old, Kang Hang and his wife returned with their children to visit Li Ping. However, this time, the attitude of the two people has changed greatly, because in these days, they have also understood Li Ping's efforts and hard work.
Li Ping felt very relieved and no longer pretended to be ill, saying that if her son and daughter-in-law were really difficult, she could still help with the child, but she still had to take on all the things, she was still a little powerless. Kang Hang and his wife also understood, so they only picked up Li Ping occasionally, but most of the time, they came back to see Li Ping.
And Li Ping's life is gradually happy, Li Ping also understands three truths, first, it is impossible for parents to grasp the child forever and not let go, let the child grow up on his own, far better than being a free nanny.
Second, the ability of parents is limited after all, even if you want to help your children, you must find a way, after all, everyone's family conditions are there, you want to be a child's cash machine, but also to see their own ability.
Third, do not arbitrarily interfere in the marriage of children, only let the son and daughter-in-law slowly run into each other, live a good life, in order to figure out how to live.
Li Ping was initially obsessed with her son and daughter-in-law, and she was happy to help, but she did not expect to let her son and daughter-in-law develop the habit of dependence, and also let herself be tired and almost unable to stand up straight during the three months of taking her grandson. And when Li Ping wanted to understand everything and choose to let go, her son and daughter-in-law gradually learned how to live in life.
In fact, many parents are very uneasy even if their children grow up, because they feel that their children have never struggled in society, and they will definitely suffer a lot of hardships and setbacks, so they always can't help but help their children, but they have not thought that this is such help, hindering the child's independence and growth path. In fact, who does not suffer setbacks? Only by being polished by society can you continue to live when you encounter difficulties.
Therefore, as a parent, we must learn to let go and always wrap our children under their own wings, which is not necessarily a good thing. Because parents cannot accompany their children for a lifetime, only by letting children grow up on their own, learn to live, learn to take on the responsibility of a husband or wife, and learn how to be a parent, can they harvest true happiness. And this is also the best education for children as parents.
Today's Topic:
Do you have such a mother by your side?
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