When Sweetie was 13 years old, I was surprised to find that she seemed to have signs of early love. Once many parents find out that the girl in the family has early love behavior, they will definitely look panicked and preach to the girl

When Sweetie was 13 years old, I was surprised to find that she seemed to have signs of early love. Once many parents find out that the girls in the family have early love behavior, they will definitely look panicked, preach to the girls, and even severely suppress them. I had this impulse at first, but after thinking about it, although I was worried in my heart, I finally decided to talk to her in a different way.

After much deliberation, I decided to tell Sweetie about my experience and talk to her about my thoughts on the early love of elementary school students. One day, after dinner, I chatted with Sweetie very casually, and then naturally talked about my "first love".

I mysteriously said to Sweetie, "Mom told you a secret, when I was so old, I liked a little boy in our class, and I often played with him and felt happy every day." Later, both of our grades slipped, and our homeroom teacher saw the signs and talked to us separately. I remember that the class teacher did not criticize me, but talked to me about ideals and guided me to focus more on my studies, so that I would have a better future...

"Later, after I met your father, every time I thought of the so-called relationship in the sixth grade of primary school, I would smirk and feel how I was so naïve at that time, how could I like such a little boy? You know, in the process of growing up, my mother's vision is also getting wider and wider, the standard of choice is also improving, and the vision is getting higher and higher, so my mother now feels that although the feelings of her childhood are very beautiful, but irrational, if you fall into it, you will miss a lot of beauty in life..."

I just remembered it so calmly, and Sweetie listened and didn't say a word. But I could tell that she had listened carefully and seemed to understand my intentions. Since that conversation, the little boy who came to the door every day to ask Tiantian to go to school together has never appeared again, and Tiantian has spent more time studying and reading more time.

In my opinion, being able to become the closest friend with my parents is the wish of many little girls. Opening up to the girls in the family and telling them about their childhood experiences and aspirations is the most critical step for parents and the girls in the family to become friends. Know that if parents can open their hearts to the girl, the girl will feel trust in it and will be willing to tell her parents her little secret. On this basis, parents can guide girls in a targeted manner.

I have a friend who often talks to me about her daughter Komaki during small talk. Komaki is a very lively girl, not at all like her mother—that is, my friend—friends like to be quiet, like to sit around and think quietly. When Komaki was in junior high school, he felt that he had grown up, so he asked to be "treated equally" when talking to his mother.

One day, Komaki pulled his mother into his room, closed the door, and quietly said to his mother, "Mom, I asked you something." When the friend saw that his daughter was so mysterious, he asked incomprehensibly: "What's wrong, so mysterious?" ”

"It's a topic between women, don't let Dad hear it." Komaki said in a low voice.

"Say, what's the matter?" The friend was a little impatient, thinking that the daughter had made the atmosphere a little abnormal.

"Mom, when you were in elementary or middle school, did you ever like boys?" How did you feel at the time? How do you cope with this kind of thing? ”

"Are you in love earlier?" How did you suddenly ask about this? Tell me what's going on? The friend got a little anxious and asked a series of questions.

"You answer the question I just asked, and then I'll tell you." Komaki put forward his own conditions.

"How can I answer you for such a thing?" You're still a little girl, and you don't understand feelings yet. Tell me, are you in love with another boy? The friend was a little annoyed, and the tone of the question became stiff.

"If you don't say it, I won't tell you!" After listening to his mother's words, the smile on Komaki's face disappeared.

"Hurry up and tell me what's going on, I'm dying!" Friends who did not see the change in their daughter's mood were still urging.

"You go out, I'm going to do my homework." Komaki said coldly, and then did not allow her mother to say anything more, so she pushed her out of the door and locked the door.

I remembered the previous incident, which was about this friend of mine and her daughter. The friend's daughter came to her first menstrual leave in the sixth grade of elementary school, so she asked her mother in confusion: "Mom, when did your first menstrual leave come?" Were you unprepared and soiled your pants like I did? "For the daughter's question, friends who are more conservative in their thinking are always deliberately avoidant and ashamed to talk about it. So she perfunctorily used the sentence "It's been too long, I don't remember" to perfunctorily her daughter.

To the answer of her friend, the daughter is unhappy in her heart, feeling that her mother always asks her to tell her feelings without reservation, but she hides everywhere in front of herself, which is simply an inequality.

In my opinion, there should be nothing to talk about between the daughter and the mother, especially on some women's issues, the daughter and the mother should be the same person for life. Mothers should put aside shyness and secrets, open their hearts, inject positive energy into their daughters, and give her life and emotional guidance. Unfortunately, my friend was unable to open up to her when she asked, rejected her, and blocked the road of communication between mother and daughter.

From a psychological and pedagogical point of view, only by opening up to the girl can parents maximize the recognition of the girl, thus deepening the relationship between parents and children. But Chinese parents are rarely aware of this, they usually rarely reveal their hearts to girls, show their inner world, but hope that girls can confess everything to themselves without reservation. This creates an inequality of parent-child communication, which ultimately makes parents and daughters rivals rather than friends.