Still can't get rid of the harm of the original family, this kind of harm continues: my family's three women, I am the second oldest, the education I received from childhood is that I can only pay, and there can be no complaints, my sister is born

Or can not get rid of the harm of the original family, this kind of harm continues: my family three women, I am the second oldest, from childhood education is that I can only pay, but also can not have complaints, when my sister is sick I am thirty years old, my mother calls me every day to cry and tell me to manage my sister, no matter how must be managed, and then my sister got better, my sister's children disobeyed, my mother said to me every day to manage the doll, I myself was really stupid, I preached too much to 14 nephews, causing my nephew to give me a hard beating, My parents' family's view of this matter is that my nephew is still young, I must forgive him, I cried all night, my father also scolded me and said that this batch still cries, and it is sad to think about it. In the past two years, my sister's life has been better, my sister's life has been better, only me, and I am alone, nothing, my parents are no longer nagging them. But new problems also came out, the parents are older, the body is not as good as before, usually in the busy agricultural season, the parents help my sister work at home, when I am not busy, I help my sister with the children at my sister's house, but when my parents are sick, my sister never sees, when my sister is sick, my sister calls me, how is my mother, I have to take it to the doctor, so the parents are theirs again, and when they are sick, it is mine. But when I had a problem, my parents almost didn't care about me, last year I met the fire, I had a nightmare for a week, told my mother that I wanted her to accompany me, she wanted to help my sister plant the land, what I said was to go to me to calculate a gua, at that time I was really depressed and died, at that time I suddenly felt that I was too stupid, this life was half over, I paid so much for the original family, but I didn't have anything, and I was also disliked by my sister's father, and I felt that I should think for myself. But when I came home for the New Year, I saw that other people's parents had sisters buying new clothes for the New Year, and my parents worked for my sister for a year. It was so hard to bring my sister with a child, but neither of them considered buying a dress for my parents or anything else, on the income of my sister and sister's family, I took them to buy clothes, buy clothes, along the way my sister and sister bought and bought for themselves and their dolls, how could they not think of buying a dress for their mother who had worked hard for a year? When I asked my mother if she looked good in this dress, my sister turned her face to the side and ignored it. But it seems that from childhood to adulthood no matter what I do, my parents do not like, since I was a child, I lost my temper, my mother put me on the relatives and neighbors where I was, said that I have a strange temper, resulting in me now very afraid of what others say about me, dad is not to mention, before eating and wearing almost I wrapped up alone, but he still does not like me, and often unhappy on the scolding, hey all this reason is the three women in the family, I am the second oldest, my parents do not like is not like. But my own mouth can not express, and very stupid, really stupid, stupid to myself do not know what to do, otherwise I would have thought for myself earlier, I would not have fallen into this state, hey, I don't know what life will be like in the future? After all, the age is older, the hope is also small, and the parents are also old, the situation at home is also very realistic, the parents must work for my sister and my sister when they are healthy, the illness must be mine, to tell the truth, I also have complaints, but can not ignore, otherwise their life is meaningless, to the old age is not good. Oh life is really not satisfactory, but my parents can't see my efforts, resulting in insomnia every day during this time, hey, tired, tired