1, and the boss lady on a business trip, after returning to the boss lady pregnant, ? fired me, I was immediately angry, so I found the boss. The hostess said. Do you know why you were fired, I said

1, and the boss lady on a business trip, after returning to the boss lady pregnant, ? fired me, I was immediately angry, so I found the boss. The hostess said. Do you know why you were expelled, I said I don't know, didn't I buy milk powder for the child? The hostess said no, why do others send you a happy one next time? After saying that, he threw the beer lid on my head. Heck, how do people now know that this is power. There was no way but to look for a job. Find a factory, the security guard will not let in, there is no way but to say to the security guard: I came to find the daughter-in-law, the security guard said: Who is your daughter-in-law, say the name I am sure, just next to the list of excellent employees in the factory, I casually read a xxx. Then the security guard took the baton and began to beat me: She is my daughter-in-law, what is your relationship with my daughter-in-law. Then I was kicked out.

2, the girlfriend lost love, called me to drink, she drank two bottles of Jiang Xiaobai herself, drunk drunk, and finally I carried her back home. After I got home, I gave her a piece of watermelon to let her drink, she cried while eating, and finally looked at the watermelon juice on the ground, thinking it was blood, crying that she had a terminal illness and that her life would not be long! She also tugged at my clothes and said: When I die, you will let my ex-boyfriend come down to accompany me!

3. When my father and mother were not at home, I stole my father's treasured liquor. This was my first time with baijiu, and I was drunk after only one glass of wine. When I woke up, I found myself tied to a pole by a rope. I was confused and hurriedly asked my mother what was going on. My mother told me the truth, and I smoked a cigarette when I was drunk and shouted at my father: "You are a cow, usually give me so little pocket money, do you call Hanako?" Get some money for the little master! "In the end, it was my mother who swore to die to save my life!"

4, the heat of the college entrance examination soared to the extreme, the local bus company deployed an air-conditioned car for parents to cool off, and this car is 985 road and 211 road! Parents shouted: I like it too much, Heavenly King GaidiHu, all on 985! All on 211! The trumpets are all shouted, and this parent is very bullish! Support students, after the exam will be assured, parents are anxious, children are also anxious!

5. Yesterday, I shared a roommate with me, took the subway to work together, and we both talked and laughed on the subway. The subway stopped at a station, came up to a white-bearded uncle, and the roommate immediately gave up his seat to the uncle. Uncle said, "Thank you, little brother." The roommate smiled and said to Uncle, "Uncle, am I that old?" Uncle came and said, "I can't say thank you grandson!" ”

6. The master took in a disciple yesterday and started practicing with me today. This disciple is a lay family member, and on weekdays, as long as he comes out on Saturdays and Sundays to practice with me. Yesterday I heard him say to me: Books are the ladder of human progress, and I think they are deceitful! Stop telling me about poetry and bookishness! Eagle Hero, Legend of archery hero, Tianlong Eight, how many times have I read it? There has been no progress in martial arts at all, and I still can't beat my wife!

7, the little nephew often caused trouble in the school, the brother felt more troublesome, every time I was asked to go, one after another and his class teacher also slowly became familiar. There will be a parent-teacher meeting on Friday, so that parents and class teachers can get acquainted with it, my brother is going on a business trip, so let me go on his behalf. I heard the little fellow say, "Teacher, introduce me to you, this is my aunt and your future daughter-in-law!!! "The younger brother once saw with his own eyes what it was like to smile in a circle of ignorance without losing his manners.

8, when I was a child, my mother beat me for a long time, and I was very unconvinced. Decided to pretend to be crazy, to scare and scare her, I just pretended to be crazy. The old mother said yo-yo: Oh, this is really crazy, eat SHI in the future, and save food. I immediately stood in a disciplined manner, smiled with tears in my eyes and said: Mom, I am not crazy, I am fine! So mom came over and it was a fight...?

9. Once upon a time, there was a man who was a famous athlete who actually knew nothing about sports. Once, this person was invited to participate in a school's athletics meeting, and received a 100-meter sprint athlete: What are the results now, and have they improved? Athlete: It's almost 13 seconds. The man nodded and said: "Not bad, but don't be satisfied, you have to reach 14 seconds in a short period of time, and strive to break through 15 seconds!"

10. I lost more than half a million yuan in entrepreneurship this year, which was very unhappy, so I found a master to calculate my future fortunes. I asked: Master, my life is a failure, what should I do now? The master said: Trees move to death, people move to live, you can go to a farther place, such as Paris, your life will turn around. I was overjoyed when I heard it: Really? What kind of turnaround? Master: Transit in Europe.?

11, the unit has a new female colleague who looks very bumpy, and she can't eat at a glance. Last month, my boss asked me to take her on a business trip, and her husband had to follow. During the lunch break, I took her husband to a place where no one was. Me: "Brother, your wife looks like this, and I'm still afraid that I have ideas about her, don't you have any confidence?" The husband of the female colleague: "Not this afternoon I went to the president's office to ask for leave, I: "President, my ex-wife got married and asked me to go, can I take a leave of absence?" President: "Approved, don't lose face!" Our company is also a good company, drive a better car earthquake scene, you look at the recent four hundred thousand to go ok? I shook my head, president: "That's the best one!" Imported goods millions! Me: "President, are you sure I drive an excavator and people won't kill me?" ”

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #