Professor Rong Xinqi's studio is visited every day by different people, and they all have their own psychological questions and life troubles. From teenagers, to adults, middle-aged and elderly people, through the form of individuals, partners, and families, a large part of them come to do psychological counseling for children and adolescents, and some of them come to counseling with children, in the form of parent-child consultation.
Many people may not understand, why do children also need psychological counseling? Is it appropriate for children and adolescents to do psychological counseling?
1. The world of adults is complex, and children's psychology also needs to be paid attention to and understood!
What parents care about most is often when the child begins to have behavioral problems, such as the child becoming prone to tantrums, not paying attention to the decline in grades in class, and even stealing, disobedience and other behaviors. When the child's behavior changes dramatically, it is understandable that parents are anxious, but many parents will think that the child is "bad at learning" and subconsciously reprimand or punish, so that the opportunity to understand the child may be missed, if the child has been accused several times, he may not be willing to turn to his parents for help in the future.
Perhaps the child's behavior changes are due to some difficulties encountered in the heart, but it may be the time to help and guide them. At this time, through counseling, paying attention to the inner behind the child's behavior problems and guiding from the side will often have different effects.
2. The body and mind grow rapidly, and the inherent complexity may not be able to keep up with this growth.
Children as children are facing rapid physical and psychological growth, but the complexity of the brain at the moment does not necessarily keep up with the growth process. Different stages of development will present different psychological characteristics, so it is necessary to understand whether the child's psychological development is in line with their age and guide the child's growth.
And today's most headache for parents of the Internet addiction problem, but also accelerated the child's growth and brain development gap, children for a long time exposed to the chaotic network environment, it is difficult to ensure that the child has enough ability to digest these contents, it is difficult to avoid whether the child will have misunderstanding, always need someone to pay attention to and understand the child's heart, and understand and pay attention to the heart, that is, counseling needs to do one of the things.
3. Children's lives are full of challenges, but feelings may not be able to say them.
The process of children's growth is bound to face a series of problems. Parent-child conflicts, family changes, school adaptation, interpersonal dating, etc., are all new troubles and challenges for children, and may not be able to fully cope with them. Secondly, the development of language in childhood is not yet perfect, and children may not be able to clearly describe their feelings through language, but more often reflect it through "external behavior".
For example, it is common to see children biting their nails, which may be a manifestation of anxiety, but the child may not be able to clearly explain what has been experienced, so it cannot be fully expressed, and unconsciously use nail biting to alleviate their anxiety. In such a situation, under the treatment of the child counselor, it is particularly important to help the child discover the potential feelings and assist in sorting out through the guidance of the child counselor.
What kind of services will counselors provide in child psychological counseling? What will be the effect on children and families? And listen to professor Rong Xinqi, a child psychologist, one by one.
1. Help children to recognize themselves and guide the expression of thoughts and feelings.
Earlier we mentioned that children may not understand what is happening in their inner world, or do not know how to say it clearly, and it is often difficult for parents to detect or help. In such cases, child counsellors usually use artistic assistance such as games or paintings to get closer to the child's inner nature through activities, to help them understand their inner world, and the child has the opportunity to re-experience the events that occur in real life in a symbolic, non-spoken way.
Sometimes, like a translator, a child counsellor will use language to help your child speak out, which in turn helps the child to reorganize these feelings and thoughts, and then practice speaking. In this process, children will continue to feel cared for and accepted, and will also cultivate children's attention to their own psychological feelings, and slowly learn to respect themselves, and then have more strength and methods to cope with the challenges in life.
2. Assess your child's developmental stages and behavioral problems.
From the moment the child enters the counseling room, the evaluation has begun, from observing how the child chooses a position to sit down, interacting with the counselor, how to choose the media for counseling, playing games, etc., through the observation and consultation of these behaviors, to judge the child's current physical and mental development and problems, and to determine the help that the child needs.
For example, when the child enters the school age stage, he will pay special attention to the child's interpersonal interaction indoor and outdoor in the consultation, how to show the need to interact with people, whether he can properly interpret the language of others, and express his own feelings, etc., and sometimes through psychological tests, to assess the child's adaptation to life, interpersonal or emotional feelings.
3. Provide parental counseling and cooperate with parents to assist children.
When counselling with children, parenting function is seen as one of the protective factors for problems with the child's behaviour. When the family has a good enough parent-child relationship, and the parents also have the knowledge and ability to discipline their children, it will help improve the child's behavior problems, so family function will also be one of the main evaluation items.
For example, when a child has psychological distress, can parents provide appropriate assistance and guidance to the child? Parent-child relationships are often conflicted, how can parents use effective communication methods to interact with their children? Is the parenting strategy appropriate for parents in the face of children with different characteristics?
When necessary, psychological counselors and hypnotists will provide parenting counseling to discuss the difficulties encountered in parenting with parents. By collecting information about the child's behavior in the treatment room and interacting with the child, and feeding these observations back to the parents, this will help parents understand the child's behavior problems, help establish appropriate parenting strategies, and cultivate a parent-child relationship that is more helpful for the child's growth.
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