Adolescent sex education and emotional education are very important, and the lack or distortion of these educations can have an irreparable negative impact on a child's life.
The previous article shared a lot of emotional problems that may occur in adolescent children, so in order to avoid tragedy, but also let the emotional experience of children's adolescence bring more positive energy to their lives, today I will share the principles and methods of how to correct emotional education.
In Chinese society, do you find it difficult to talk about emotional education, especially sex education? In fact, it is still cultural traditions that determine that parents and children talk about sex and even talk about love is a social taboo, relatively speaking, some cultures and personalities will make these related love behaviors look very ambiguous, to break this embarrassing tradition, it is necessary to lead by example from parents,
My children have received emotional education since childhood, all of them have begun in elementary school, and even some from kindergarten, they will use simple human organ models to explain some differences between boys and girls, because they can use organ models to clearly see the differences between them, and this time they will especially tell children.
First, the boundaries of each person's body are very important, which organs are boys have, girls do not, or girls have boys do not, parents can make good use of some toys, models to teach them, and at any time to remind the location of the dangerous triangle, others can not touch casually.
Now there are usually a lot of teaching materials, such as the use of some dolls, but these dolls are very important, they are expressionless, is to avoid that in the education, children will feel that the doll looks like a happy or happy association, so that there will be some incorrect concepts are brought in.
Therefore, parents are accustomed to using expressionless dolls, whether male or female, from the chest to the lower body, and slowly teach children which range is a dangerous area for us, and do not touch it casually. Similar to this kind of physical boundaries are very small to start teaching, rather than waiting until adolescence to teach, the sooner you teach the better, naturally you can do more with less.
The example just given is the simplest, because the child can find the same organs in himself as the doll, so that he will know the difference between men and women.
Second, when communicating with children about sexual related issues, adults must not be ambiguous in their own words, nor are they very obscure, if you use some very obscure and alternative statements, the concepts developed by children will have an ambiguous and negative demonstration. So now we are advocating the use of the correct organ name, because the name is right, the child knows that everyone has such an organ, we must learn to respect ourselves, but also to respect the organs of others.
And if they use some colloquialisms or some ambiguous pronouns, it means that they do not really have the opportunity to face such a respect problem, because they will find these sayings and pronouns funny, which will give them a better chance to promote the possibility of violating others.
Third, the attitude of the parents is really very, very important, if the parents will only secretly comment over there: What happened to the son, what to do? Daughters seem to be reading some romance, novels, etc., you use some very private, obscure ways to discuss with your husband or wife, instead of discussing with the child, the child will actually observe the color, they will understand your ambiguous attitude.
There are even some parents who worry about whether their children have made bad friends and secretly read their children's diaries or the contents of their mobile phones. Remind parents not to do this kind of thing, do not think that this is the right of parents, know that when you do such a thing, the trust of parent-child relationship will be like a piece of toilet paper that has been kneaded, and the wrinkles that appear in it will never come back.
We have to learn to respect your children, and your children will naturally respect others.
Fourth, parents should make good use of some social topics, in fact, there will be a lot of social news that has become a hot topic, such as a horror lover, or some regrets that occur because of impulsive quarrels with boyfriends and girlfriends, which can be very clear and clear for children to discuss.
For example, I will tell my child, if you see this news today, if you are his friend, how will you look at him, how will you remind him of the things he should pay attention to? Remember that adolescent children are sensitive, you don't put your child directly into the seat, if it happens to you, what would you do?
We need to use the third-party story, and smart parents will know that children like to listen to stories, tell stories, and pass on stories, and use these protagonists in the stories to understand the real ideas and ideas of adolescent children.
For example, if you encounter such a problem now, what would you think? What can we do from a parental perspective? If parents want to understand their children's ideas, in fact, they must first give him a little step, use the stories of third parties to communicate and communicate with their children, they can also use the sandwich expression method mentioned before, and they can also say to their children: I am so stupid at your age, I don't think like you.
When you say this, you affirm the child, he will feel that he has really grown up, and he is willing to continue to discuss with you. Because we're talking about the third person, we're not indicating that it's him. Therefore, you can communicate and tell stories with children through the stories of other people's children, or some unfortunate and emotional social events in society.
Don't be ambiguous when communicating, and don't run away from these topics, because other people's stories are not our children, so we are more willing to face and open our hearts to communicate.
Fifth, parents must have the height of parents, now teenagers will use mobile phones to access the Internet every day, it is recommended that parents or do not give children mobile phones, this is the responsibility that parents should have. Don't wait until the child reaches puberty, curiosity attacks, and sees content that should not be read on the Internet, at this time parents will accuse the child of how to read these things.
In fact, parents should have the idea and practice of thinking of danger in peace at the beginning, make some preparations, and prevent some content that they do not want their children to see.
The above five points are a few very important principles for parents when educating adolescent children emotionally.
Next, I will share with you, what parts of a good emotional education should be?
First, this part should first emphasize a concept with parents, in short, emotional education it is not directly jumped into love, must be liked before entering love.
Therefore, the most important thing about the best emotional education is whether the parents' feelings are good or not, and when the parents' feelings are good, the emotional education has been successful for a long time.
Second, because the extension of emotion is gradually and slowly into the whirlpool of love, parents may wish to often take their children to participate in some large group activities, and slowly in these large groups will gradually find a group of friends who are closer to your concept and like-minded, in fact, this way is not only adolescence, lifelong We can continue to carry out.
To put it simply, parents take their children to participate in some activities from an early age, such as reading clubs and calligraphy clubs, in addition to parents leading by example, more importantly, through these activities, children can find partners who are very similar to his interests, ideas and concepts, which is a normal and stable way of social development.
Many parents will complain that when their children go to college, they seem to have suddenly begun to be sexually liberated. In fact, college students participate in different clubs, but also encourage him to find good friends who are similar to their own habits, concepts, etc. in these clubs, and can continue to communicate, just like from large groups to small groups, from the direction of the point to find the right friends for you, this parents should start to guide from an early age, this is very important.
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