01
I saw a video on the Internet: My daughter-in-law wrote a poem to thank my mother-in-law for her 12 years of love.
In the video, the daughter-in-law said to her mother-in-law: "Mom, I wrote a paragraph to send to you." What kind of existence does my mother-in-law have in my heart? She was the one who accompanied me to tears when my mother died; she was the one who anxiously waited outside the delivery room when I gave birth; she was the one who took care of me and the baby day and night during the month; she was the one who would give me full support no matter what I did; she was the one who gave me warmth and waiting all year round. She was my mother-in-law, the one who had never given birth to me and raised me and had no blood relation to me, but she was also the one who made me cry out to my mother from the bottom of my heart. ”
The mother-in-law listened to the poems read by her daughter-in-law and shed tears when she listened to them.
I was very touched by watching this video, because in real life, there are too few harmonious mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships like this. The mother-in-law in the video treats the daughter-in-law as her own daughter-in-law, the daughter-in-law's mother died very uncomfortable, she can accompany the daughter-in-law; the daughter-in-law needs to be taken care of when she gives birth to a child, and the mother-in-law also helps to take care of it day and night. The mother-in-law first gave the daughter-in-law a piece of warmth and kindness, and the daughter-in-law will also be moved to give the mother-in-law more warmth and a thank you.
I am often asked by some readers: What is the secret of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? How can I have a good mother-in-law relationship?
To tell you the truth, in the best mother-in-law relationship, the mother-in-law must treat the daughter-in-law as a pro-daughter-in-law, and only when the mother-in-law treats the daughter-in-law as a pro-daughter-in-law, she will have no complaints when she does some things. Don't treat your daughter-in-law as an outsider, you must know that when the relationship between the two of you is good, the family can be quiet and peaceful.
Have you found that in those families where the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are not harmonious, the relationship between husband and wife is mostly not good. I can even say that the root of the contradiction between husband and wife is more or less related to the discord between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. The daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law are unhappy, hoping that the husband will come back to support justice, but who wants the husband to stand on the side of his mother; if the man is toward the wife, the mother-in-law will also be unhappy, they will feel that the son is raised in vain, "marry the daughter-in-law and forget the mother." Then the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law evolved into a contradiction between husband and wife, making a family miasma.
Why bother? Why can't we get along? They are all family members, why do they have to start infighting?
In the best mother-in-law relationship, the mother-in-law must treat the daughter-in-law as a daughter-in-law.
02
After I gave birth to my second child, my mother-in-law came to help me with the child, and now we have been together for almost a year, and we are still very harmonious. My husband was still afraid that we had a conflict, because before marriage, I had an awkward relationship with my mother-in-law, but now, I get along with my mother-in-law, and I don't need my husband to coordinate at all. Sometimes, I also joined forces with my mother-in-law to make jokes about my husband, accusing him of being too lazy and asking him to do more work.
I had a heart-to-heart relationship with my mother-in-law some time ago, and my mother-in-law said, "I hurt you as if you were my own daughter." So you see you and Qizhen (my husband) you two sometimes quarrel, I never interject, you two things you solve by yourself, I am an old man I do not mix, you little couple fighting mouth is inevitable. I don't care if you spend money on clothes, the money you earn yourself, you buy whatever you want. I'm different from other people, I hope you dress up more, young, take advantage of this time to dress yourself more. You can do whatever you want, and I'm responsible for bringing you two treasures to kindergarten, and I'm done. When the time comes, I will go back to my hometown and live your life well. ”
My mother-in-law was very touched by what she said, she regarded me as a pro-girlfriend, and I also regarded her as a mother.
After living together for nearly a year, my mother-in-law was really good to me, I had a conflict with my husband, she was basically watching the drama, and she didn't talk, even if she talked, it was toward me. My mother-in-law will make us food, and when it is done, she will let me eat it first, and sometimes I am embarrassed. I often buy things online and she never asks me what I bought. Sometimes I go out with friends for hours, and she doesn't ask.
My mother-in-law gave me a lot of freedom, she didn't care about my husband, she didn't care about me, she just wanted to take care of the children for us.
I can feel my mother-in-law's kindness to me, so I will also be very good to her, if I go out, I will worry about buying her good food, I will also buy her shoes and clothes, I will care about her body, in fact, many times it is a matter of words, because my mother-in-law likes to listen to good sounds, I will also praise her more.
I praised her for the delicious food she cooked, I praised her for being a good grandmother, and I would defend her in everything.
We never competed for hostesses at home, but gave each other corresponding respect and freedom. In fact, where are there so many complicated mother-in-law and daughter-in-law contradictions? Why not do so much? Sometimes it's just that two people care, they can't pull down their faces, and a small thing becomes a big thing.
My mother-in-law and I also had a conflict, but because we could see each other, we quickly reconciled again.
However, in the best mother-in-law relationship, it must be the mother-in-law who treats the daughter-in-law as a daughter-in-law first, and the mother-in-law treats the daughter-in-law with sincerity, and the daughter-in-law will also be grateful.
03
Is the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law really a problem that has been solved for etern Not necessarily in my opinion. In fact, I had a big conflict with my mother-in-law before marriage, because my mother-in-law couldn't look at me and then blocked me, she did some quite excessive things, and I also had harsh words with my husband, I said that his mother was an old demon. Of course, this is all angry words.
After getting married and having children, I got along with my mother-in-law, adhering to a principle: never mention the unhappiness of the past, let the past things pass, and then we have to get along well, she is very good to me, I am also very good to her, we have reached an agreement.
The best relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is that the mother-in-law first treats the daughter-in-law as a daughter-in-law, and the mother-in-law is the person who comes over, don't always make it difficult for the daughter-in-law. As long as you do a good job before marriage and see the daughter-in-law as a person, then you must be kind to other people's daughters after marriage. There is no need to always interfere, let them live their own lives, all you can do is help, and the rest let them watch and do it themselves.
My mother, who is also a mother-in-law, once said to me: "I treat your sister-in-law as a daughter-in-law, and my daughter-in-law is the same as her daughter-in-law, and even I hurt her even more." You're like I can only help her with the child, but I can't help you with the child. But as an elder, I can hurt her first, and I have to understand and understand that she doesn't understand it, and if she doesn't understand good and has to do it, then I won't be angry with her. If you can get together, you can't get together, and if you can't come, you don't demand it. Two people can not get along too much, only mutual understanding, will be harmonious and communion. ”
Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law complicated?
In fact, it is not complicated at all, the key depends on what kind of mentality you have in it.
I hope that in real life, there can be more mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who get along harmoniously, and the mother-in-law treats the daughter-in-law as a daughter-in-law, and the daughter-in-law is also more grateful to the mother-in-law, don't do so many things. The two women handle the family relationship well, and the family will prosper.
Today's topic: Did your mother-in-law treat you as a daughter-in-law? Welcome to leave a message.
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★ Author: YIBAO; emotional original author, writing about the warm emotional affairs of this world.