A middle-aged female friend said to me that my husband repeatedly cheated and was discovered by himself, but he did not want to repent, as always, repeatedly cheated, and even sometimes extremely excessive, in front of his own face and his lover, he was in pain, and he was about to collapse, but I had no choice but to evade himself and anesthetize himself, waiting for him to change his mind, I angrily questioned her, since the husband hurt you so much, and there is no bottom line, you love so despicable and even nest, endure endless suffering and torture, what is it? Why not cut him off and start life over.
She was very sad and helpless to say her own situation, their husband and wife from love to marriage, also love and harmony, and then the husband contracted a small business, after years of operation, the business is still good, the family conditions began to get better, the husband proposed to let himself not have to go to work, bother to work and can not earn a few money, simply stay at home, do not have to go to the hard work, will not be sun and rain, as long as the home is taken care of on the line, the matter of making money is handed over to him, at first I felt that it was not bad, the male owner outside, the female owner inside, it is also very good, So he resigned with a hot head.
Back at home to the husband and son, run the family, life is also moist, perhaps in response to the "proverb" of "men have money to become bad", now that the hand is rich, the husband has also begun to swell, in the outing of the cheating to do things, for which they are also resentful, intolerable, but helpless, because once divorced, will lose everything they have, and their own people to middle age, coupled with many years of no work, away from society for too long, and no skills, and no skills to settle down, And I'm now in a good habit of living.
I can't think of the scene after the divorce, I can only take the "out of sight for purity" approach now, endure humiliation and dirt to live, I am a full-time wife who has been at home for many years, what can I do with him? What autonomy and choice do I have? After listening to her say those four words, I couldn't help but feel a tightness in my heart, resulting in an inexplicable sense of sadness and disappointment, and the tragic story of a full-time wife, how lamentable and sad this identity is, women must not allow themselves to have this title, what is the worst identity of a woman? This one, the "full-time wife".
Speaking of "full-time wife", it can be said that it has a long history, in ancient times by the feudal ideology of male superiority and female inferiority and the shackles of etiquette, women's social status is extremely low, can not participate in social activities to create value to meet the needs of survival, can only be a "full-time wife", dependent on men's life, women have no choice, "marry a man, dress and eat" has become an inevitability, that is limited by the times, belongs to the special deformed products of a specific era, beyond reproach, and now all this has become the dust of history, the whole society has long realized equality between men and women, Men and women on the social stage became protagonists.
Participate in social activities together, women can create value, to achieve self-sufficiency has become an objective reality, and only self-reliance and self-reliance can master their own destiny, dominate their own lives, live out the real wonderful, and to this day, there are still many women still holding the old traditional concept of "marrying a man, dressing and eating", want to rely on men to live with marriage, there are still many women with this idea and practice, and it is not uncommon, from the surface, this can be done without participating in social competition, without hard work.
You can also get something for nothing, sit back and enjoy it, and when a "full-time wife" seems like a good choice, what will be the result of this choice? First of all, let's look at what the "full-time wife" is, there are nothing more than two situations, one is around the "kitchen, husband, children", all day "busy" with housework type, and there is a kind of perhaps everyone is very envious and yearning, that is, the family is rich, quite powerful, at home do not do anything, every day is just shopping and shopping, fitness and beauty, sightseeing, playing cards and entertainment, etc., living a life of fine clothes and food, pampering and pampering.
One of these two is busy, endlessly trapped in heavy and trivial chores, the other is muddy, idle, full of food and wasted time all day, but no matter which type, both are the same way, have the same characteristics, are dependent on others to survive, just like "hermit crab", "parasite", are always inseparable from the conditions of "parasitism", otherwise they can not survive, so they will naturally live involuntarily, then the pain that is naturally associated with it will also arise.
In the face of the man to be attached, all the right to speak and dominate is in the hands of the other party, so there is no doubt that he will be subject to his domination and manipulation, at home he can do whatever he wants, do whatever he wants, fully embody his own will, can fully meet his own needs, live a very dignified and decent life, while women are subject to people, obey the will of the other party, he can command you, exhale and drink, and you can only bow down to four, against the grain, completely can not disobey him, can not live at all, no status dignity.
This kind of mental repression and pain, I am afraid that few people are willing to accept and endure, right? Not only that, even if a man acts recklessly, he has no scruples, and he does not think too much about and cares about your feelings and experiences, because he knows in his heart that no matter what he does, what can you do? Because he controls your "life gate", there is no fear, he knows what you are worried about and afraid of, once he does something that hurts you, you may only make big things small, small things, once you do not accept, can not tolerate, do extreme or excessive.
He will use divorce to blackmail you as a killer, he understands that divorce is a magic weapon to restrain you, so you dare not easily offend and offend him, you can only seek perfection. There are also people often say "backing the mountain, relying on everyone to run", men have the capital and conditions to leave you at any time, and you have nothing to compete with, and no one can control the hearts and emotions of others, once he dislikes and is tired of you, he likes the new and the old, sees different thoughts, and can leave at any time, and you can only try to accommodate, tolerate, and even please and please each other.
Even if you are unfaithful and betrayal, you can often only compromise and give in, afraid that the other party will abandon you, so all day long will be worried, afraid that he will abandon you one day, you have no dependence, always live in fear, never feel solid and at ease, there is no sense of security, you say how painful this kind of life is, and this situation will continue forever, this is a matter of great fear, it is no exaggeration to say that the "full-time wife" housewife is a kind of high pay, high risk, The role of low return and the lowest security and happiness index.