Child and Adolescent Counselors Explain How to Be a Qualified Parent?

How to be a qualified parent? Is it strict with the child, or is it to go with the flow and let it develop freely? What type of parent are you?

Some parents are very strict with their children, believing that if they are strict with their children, their children will have achievements. However, children who adopt this parenting style are likely to have two situations, one is to behave very well in front of their parents, and they are also very obedient after leaving. There is also a side that satisfies oneself in front of the parents' eyes, and once the parents are gone, it is another manifestation.

Let's take a look at how to treat children and make you and your child look consistent with your child.

Guo Lifang, a famous psychological counselor for children and adolescents in Beijing, is a national psychological counselor and family education instructor; he has accumulated rich counseling experience and excellent counseling effects for many years of case counseling. After the integration of humanistic as the center, combined with the adolescent's own school interpersonal, teacher-student, classmate relationship, parent-child relationship, school performance and other comprehensive all-round factors targeted psychological counseling, while giving parents professional guidance on psychological problems encountered in the growth of children, out of a unique and effective counseling path.

First, give your child confidence and set rewards and punishments. To develop a set of behavioral standards for what children do not want to do, it is necessary to strengthen the child's behavior training, have a ability to reflect and recognize their own behavior, and give affirmation when the child arrives.

Secondly, let the child feel the love, even if the parents are too strict with the child's education method, it is best to let the child feel the care behind the parent's strictness, which will not affect the harmony between parents and children.

Third, avoid emotional speech, as a parent in front of the child must pay attention to every word and deed, the words spoken from the mouth of the parents must keep the promise, not the parents' temporary emotional reactions, to control their emotions, do not arbitrarily lose control in front of the child.

Fourth, the instructions should be clear and unambiguous. Parents must be complete, accurate, and in line with their own words and words when conveying instructions to their children. Orders cannot be ambiguous, otherwise the child may not be able to complete the task because he does not understand the content of the instruction, and may even cause the parent to be angry and think that the child is stupid.

Therefore, we believe that since the rough discipline method does not achieve the desired effect at all, the correct approach should be that parents should not blindly ask their children to meet the standards you set.

If children are often blamed, it will lead to a lack of self-confidence, which will affect the child's spontaneous mental state, so they dare not communicate with others, and they dare not face anything independently. Since some children are likely to be blamed for not meeting their parents' requirements, they will back down.

If it is an extroverted child, it is likely that they will still listen to their parents' words in childhood, but once they reach adulthood, there will be a rebound or even resistance, and the rebellious psychology will become more and more intense.