What are the misconceptions of raising a boy and raising a girl? Poor children and rich daughters are the first

In the background, you can often receive messages from mothers,

My family is a boy, and I feel so hard to bring it.

My family is a girl, I want to have another boy, but I am afraid that I will not teach well, I feel that boys and girls are very different in education, is there any way for Bao Mama?

As a mother of a man and a woman, she said that she was about to have schizophrenia...

In the education of boys and girls, there is indeed a very big difference between the two.

But in daily observation, it is found that many parents are mistaken concepts, and some are using educational methods that even invisibly harm their children.

Today, the important thing is not only dry goods, but also to help mothers correct some misunderstandings of raising boys and raising girls,

After reading the following, don't do it again.

It's normal for the girl to cry

The boy cried in disgrace

After a little boy's favorite toy was broken by other children, he cried with a wow,

As a result, my mother scolded harshly in front of everyone: "Boy's family, what are you crying about?" No shame in losing"

As a result, the child wanted to cry but did not dare to cry, and he was breathless.

When girls cry, they are often understood and comforted by adults,

But most boys are prescribed from an early age that tears are not allowed and can only be strong.

In the Canadian public service short film "Boys Don't Cry", because his parents have ignored emotions for a long time, the male protagonist has become very emotionally unstable when he grows up, and he said in his monologue:

"I am a boy, I can also have tears, I can not be strong, I can also be introverted, I can also be sad, I can also have a soft side..."

When a person is sad, he does not vent or cry, which is equivalent to "chronic suicide".

In psychology, crying does not represent weakness, but rather sends an emotional signal.

At this time, parents should not accuse and reprimand their children, otherwise they will let their children suffer a double whammy while self-denial.

It is to calm the child's emotions in time and meet his emotional needs.

Men who have tears and do not talk lightly are only an expectation, not a rule.

If there is no catharsis for children, the future can only be controlled by emotions.

Remember that no one is born invincible, and more important than making children laugh, allowing them to cry.

Girls "rich"

Boys "poor"

Tell a news,

When the girl was young, her parents loved her very much and respected the principle of a rich and adopted daughter:

The daughter wants to buy anything, spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to study abroad, and all expenses during the study period are borne by the parents, until all the savings are spent, sell the house and rent a house.

Because her daughter was too tired from living abroad, she proposed to return to China for development, and when she came back, she first proposed to have plastic surgery,

However, because his father had no physical labor, the family relied on his mother's part-time work to earn money, and could no longer pay for the expensive cost of medical beauty, so he refused.

Who knew that the daughter not only did not propose to share, but was so angry that she broke off contact with her mother.

The mother said the worst decision she ever made was to associate her rich daughter with material things.

Rich girls do not use money to pile up, but pay attention to the cultivation of spiritual vision and broaden their horizons.

Knowing the breadth of this world, you will not be blinded by someone else's words and a candy.

but has its own thoughts and ideas.

In the same way, poor boys are more than literal,

But let him suffer more and encounter more difficulties, so that he will not go down the crooked path,

It is not to limit the child's material provision, but to talk about poverty over and over again to "spur" the child.

Not only can it not arouse the boy's fighting spirit, but it will make him more inferior.

Whether spiritual or material, excessive "superiority" or "barrenness" may cause backlash.

Girls are normal introverts

Boy introverted too "mother"

8-year-old Xiao Wang is an introverted little boy,

Like to read alone, play with toys,

When he met a stranger on the road, he either pursed his lips and smiled shyly and did not speak, or he hid behind him.

My mother was very dissatisfied with his behavior, and every time she came home, she would say to him:

"Twisted, can you not be so much like a girl?"

Girls who are easily shy and do not like to talk tend to be praised for obedience, but delicate and introverted boys are always criticized.

Love clean and will be said to be different from other boys;

Shy, embarrassed, will be said to be like a little girl;

The emotions are delicate and considerate, and they will be said to be too motherly...

While these words reduce boys' self-recognition, they are also labeling girls.

Although extroverts will mingle with others more quickly, introversion is not a big drawback.

Li Meijin, a professor at the Public Security University, once said: "Most children with stable attention are introverted. ”

Apple mobile phone founder Steve Jobs was very introverted when he was in school, his hair was long, and he always didn't say a word when he reunited with classmates.

Classmates thought he was a bit withdrawn, and this personality did not change in his continuous work, but it did not affect him to become the CEO of Apple.

The mobile phone sales are the first in the world, with a total of more than 2 billion units.

Introversion does not mean slow reaction, let alone stupid, introverted children are better at thinking alone and better at getting along with themselves.

It doesn't matter if girls have poor grades

Boys can't do it if they don't get good grades

Ms. Zhang's family has a boy and a girl, both in junior high school.

In order to rush to a good high school, Ms. Zhang enrolled her son in various tutoring classes, and her daughter had nothing else to do after attending school.

When asked why the siblings are so different, Ms. Zhang will say:

"Girls, what is so good to learn, just do it."

But very big hopes for his son:

"Boys are different, they will have to support their families in the future, how can they get ahead if they don't study well?"

At any time, reading well is an important part of the upward movement.

In recent years, there have been too many excellent women who have changed the public's stereotypes of gender:

Xu Mengtao, the creator of freestyle skiing who broke 0 records, won the gold medal for China at the Winter Olympics;

At the 77th session of the United Nations General Assembly, Judge Gao Xiaoli from China's Supreme People's Court was elected as a judge of the United Nations Appeals Tribunal, the first time a Chinese candidate has been elected.

Yan Ning, who returned from the United States, founded the Academy of Medical Sciences in Shenzhen to cultivate biomedical talents with international influence.

In a society where men and women are becoming more and more equal, girls have not only the right to pursue the life they aspire to.

You can also hold up half the sky.

Zhang Guimei, the principal who used the money from her own medical treatment to create a free high school and help more than 2,000 girls get out of the mountains, once said:

"Reading can change the situation of her, her parents and her family for three generations, and we must have the courage to change."

Reading is so that every child can have better choices.

And not just to casually fulfill one of the tasks of educating girls.

The girl was too strict

The boy let it go

Raising a son worries for a while, and raising a daughter for a lifetime.

There was a neighbor before, although the girl was an adult,

But the father still did not allow late return, did not allow travel with friends during the holidays, was not allowed to spend the night outside,

The most exaggerated thing is that if the daughter is late for overtime, the father will find the unit to lose his temper with the leader.

It seems to be unlimited pampering, but it invisibly makes children lose their autonomy and privacy,

It will also be because the protection is too good, can not appreciate the multifaceted nature of society, do not know that people's hearts are sinister, and it is very easy to encounter scumbags.

Some married girls will regard the control of their other half as "love", because their parents treated her like this.

Parents can keep them safe, but more importantly, they can help them identify their boundaries, identify and defuse dangers.

Instead of using so-called protection to limit their development, because girls always have the day to leave their parents and leave the house

On the contrary, many parents will not interfere in the life of boys, often using the "free-range" method, really causing trouble outside, just use "boys, anyway, are naughty" mouthful.

Like Li Tianyi, who Bao Ma just wrote some time ago, is a good example,

Both father and mother are famous singers in China, and they have him in their fifties, and they love him very much, and they are afraid to melt in their mouths and afraid to lose them in their hands.

Li Shuangjiang said more than once: "We will not demand too much from the child, do not expect the child to be more 'successful' in life, only hope that he will grow up happily and freely, and it is also natural to have a little personality and a little rebellion." ”

Li Tianyi hit people outside and violated girls, but his parents forgave him again and again and then went to the back,

As a result, he was imprisoned for ten years, and his parents' reputation also plummeted.

Excessive harshness and freedom are a harm to the growth of children.

Bao Mama thought in pieces

The fundamental difference between boys and girls in education is not gender, but biological construction.

Whether boys or girls, every child has their own life and their own experiences.

They don't need to live in an ivory tower, but learn to navigate through the storm.

Life is a wilderness, not a track.

The premise of raising a well-rounded and healthy child is:

Equal and reasonable.