Parents can influence their children's education for a lifetime. In particular, the different personalities and qualities that parents teach their children will determine the direction of their future lives.
Among these qualities, kindness is particularly important, and it can help children move forward with hope in their future lives.
But kindness is not without a bottom line! Even if you ask your children to be kind, parents should not forget to teach them to learn these "fierceness", otherwise they will be bullied by others.
First fierce: learn to be brave enough to say "no" and know how to reject others
In life, there are many such people, for the requirements of others, although the heart is very eager to refuse, but blurted out, is still a "good" word.
Just like some time ago, in "Sister Riding the Wind and Waves", there was such a scene: Lan Yingying wanted Li Sidani to teach them a dance, and Li Sidani was embarrassed to refuse, so she agreed.
However, Zhang Yuqi, who was in the same group, said directly: "She is not free now." ", to refuse.
Because after all, the time for rehearsal is limited, Zhang Yuqi still has many difficulties in her group, and she simply does not have more energy to help Lan Yingying's group.
Most people in our lives are often unable to resolutely reject others like Zhang Yuqi.
We don't know how to refuse, and we are afraid that others will hate us, so we will always put ourselves in a "physically and mentally exhausted" situation.
Therefore, parents should teach their children the "first fierceness" is: learn to say "no" bravely, and know how to reject others! This is very important. And if children want to learn to refuse, then ask them to:
1, learn to think, know how to distinguish the priority of things
In life, parents can consciously guide their children, let them learn to think, and know how to distinguish the priorities of things.
If it is within our ability, then we can help, but if it is beyond our own ability and it has affected us to do our own things, then we must refuse.
2. When refusing, be polite
Of course, when you refuse, be polite. Explain your situation to others and why you can't help him, and apologize.
Second fierceness: When facing bullying, or even bullying, you must be brave enough to fight back
In the growth of children, it is inevitable to encounter situations of being bullied, or even bullied. Especially some weak, introverted children, they are often bullied by others. After all, some people just like to pick soft persimmon pinches.
In order to ease the relationship between their children, many parents will choose to let their children endure and feel that "taking a step back from the sea and the sky". But the truth is that in many cases, "taking a step back" will only make others inch forward.
Therefore, we must teach our children to be brave in the face of bullying, even bullying. However, the premise of this confidence requires us to:
1. Let the child exercise more and enhance the physique
Usually when there is nothing to do, we should urge children to exercise more, enhance their physique, and enhance their self-protection ability. Although we can't protect our children all the time, we can let them learn to protect themselves.
2. Give your child trust, and don't deny your child casually
In addition to requiring children to have a healthy physique, parents should also give their children more trust in their daily lives, and do not casually deny them.
In this way, the child gains a sense of security, even if he is bullied, he will bravely tell you the first time.
Third ruthlessness: for some "lost friends", we must break off friends in time
Kind children can often make more friends, which is why we want our children to maintain a kind and sincere heart.
But not all friends are "good friends", and it is inevitable that some people like to cross the river and tear down bridges, two sides and three knives. For such "lost friends", it is necessary to break off friends in time.
Let the child understand that sincerity is a certainty in getting along with friends, but do not deliberately please. For those friends who are ungrateful and like to take advantage of others, be sure to stay away.
Life will give preferential treatment to good people, but it is not okay to be too kind. Kindness is based on protecting oneself.
If this kindness will put children in a situation of being bullied, then we may as well teach them to be "cruel".