Parents are always lamenting that the birth of the child seems to be just yesterday, soft little hands, crumpled skin. Suddenly, time passed so quickly, the child went to kindergarten, went to primary school, went to middle school, and went to the ivory tower of the university.
So hurried.
When the child is young, your negligence and slackness to him are his sighs when he grows up. Take advantage of these years, while the child is still young, accompany the child more!
1
Many parents say that the current social competition is so fierce, they have to be busy with work on the one hand, and busy with socializing on the other hand, where is the time to take children? Besides, everything I am doing now is also for the sake of my children.
I've heard a story like this before:
A young mother drives a famous car to take her daughter to an aristocratic primary school (residential school).
The mother said to the child: Although the mother does not have time to accompany you, the mother is to make more money and send you to a better school in the future, you know?
The daughter said: I know. Then the daughter said to her mother: When I grow up, I will also make a lot of money and send you to the best nursing home.
After listening, the mother put on the brakes and stopped at the side of the road to cry bitterly.
This is a true story. The mother thought that providing the best material life for her child was the greatest love for her child. However, when she heard her daughter's answer, she couldn't help but shed bitter tears.
Perhaps many people will say that this child is really unfilial and even wants to send his parents to a nursing home!
However, according to the values instilled in her child by this mother, the mother believes that making money to send her daughter to the best school is love, and the daughter thinks that sending her mother to the best nursing home is love.
Therefore, we cannot say that the child's answer is not filial piety, because as a parent, you raise your child in this way.
You give money to your child, thinking that the money contains your love, but the child only sees the money, not the love. Children are used to days without their mothers, thinking that money can buy everything.
Imagine if your child also told you that you were going to send you to a nursing home in the future. It's definitely not good. Because we adults know very well that money can't buy everything.
When you send your child to a teacher, a babysitter, or a grandparent, you lose at least half of it because you pass on a responsibility that belongs to you to someone else.
2
Earning money to support the family is the responsibility of every parent, a reality we have to admit, but at the same time, I have also seen such a survey, the results show that 30% of parents go home and do the most, is to play with mobile phones.
For them, watching TV at home, surfing the Internet, playing games and other recreational activities are more conducive to releasing stress and regulating emotions. In addition, 15% of parents will take their work home to complete.
It is not difficult to see that parents are not completely free of time to accompany their children, depending on whether you have the heart to spend time with their children. An education expert once said: If a gay man can quit drinking twice a week, and a lesbian can take out the time of makeup and makeup removal every day to accompany her child, then your child is half a genius.
Times are different, and the way of education will naturally change. Parents think that they want to make more money to buy a house, buy a car, and marry a daughter-in-law for their children, but they unconsciously stay away from their children, is this really worth it?
There is a saying: If the children and grandchildren are like me, what they do with money, and if they are wise and rich, they will lose their will; if the children and grandchildren are not as good as me, what they do with the money, foolish and rich, and increase their excesses.
If you really want your child to have a job, don't save money for your child. If parents have the ability to save 1 million for their children before they turn 18, they may wish to invest 1 million in their children from now on, and wait until he is 18 years old to leave him a zero. He himself has the ability to survive in society, can earn his own money, and will have greater development prospects in the future, right?
Don't make excuses that there is no time, as long as parents have children in their hearts, there will always be time. Accompanying children is an unshirkable responsibility that cannot be shirked under any pretext, and it is necessary to accompany you as busy as possible.
3
Some time ago, there was something going on in my hometown, and my mother told me the story of a child at my grandmother's house. The kid was just three years old, but very well-behaved.
The child is cute, has big eyes, and looks very smart.
Don't be fed, a bowl of white rice with a little soup can eat half a bowl by yourself.
Peeing his pants for fear of being beaten, he hid, but he was still caught and beaten.
When I was beaten, I didn't cry, because I didn't dare to cry, and I cried even harder.
The child was placed in foster care at an aunt's house because his parents were working outside the home.
There are a total of three children in the old man's home, and this "foreign" child must be more sensible.
Everyone said that the child was too well-behaved, really sensible, and easy to bring.
But I thought this child was so pitiful. From a young age, he was suppressed to please the people who raised him.
If you grow up in such an environment for a long time, you may have psychological problems in the future.
Psychologist Winnicott said of individual development, "The emotional development of children in the first years of life forms the basis of individual human mental health. ”
Many cases point out that most problem children often show depressed well-behaved behavior when they are young. In adolescence, they tend to form antisocial personalities, become rebellious, develop bad habits, and so on.
Many parents do not know what their children really need and what is a truly good life.
In fact, all children really need is happiness. Without a real feeling for happiness, even high-ranking officials and rich people will still be depressed and suicidal. Family together is happiness.
The child's heart is like a garden, when he is young, he does not plant the seeds of love, does not let him feel the love and care of the sun and rain, then his heart may gradually breed darkness and weeds.
Many parents wait until their children are older to find out, but it is too late. The child's education can not wait for us to make up, as long as a little negligence, the child's growth changes will be obvious.
Once some problems are developed, they will take a lot of energy to correct, or even not correct at all.
4
I once read a passage like this:
10 years later, you give your current house to your children and they will answer you: it's too old!
20 years later, you give your current car to your kids and they'll tell you: Don't be funny!
30 years later, you give your current renminbi to your children, and they will laugh and say: It's not worth much!
However, if you can give your child a good and scientific home education as they grow up, after 30 years your child will say, "Mom and Dad, you are so wise, thank you from the bottom of my heart!" ”
In the vicissitudes of the sea, time turns, and material and money will change. However, the inheritance of character, the inheritance of family culture, the accumulation of knowledge, the quality of character and the influence of family education can be continued from generation to generation.
Therefore, the most important and best gift that parents give to their children should be high-quality companionship and good family education!
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