Fans write to ask: Female colleagues ask him to borrow money, how to refuse to not hurt feelings?
According to fans, last month she received a request from a female colleague to borrow 3,000 yuan from her. Fans didn't want to borrow, but considering that they were female colleagues and didn't want to rip their faces, they finally borrowed money.
After saying that it was a week later, but the other party did not move at all, and then the fans had to wait for the unit to pay the salary and then ask for money.
As a result, although the female colleague paid back the money, she looked a little reluctant.
Fans are very annoyed and want to know how to politely refuse her request if a female colleague borrows money without hurting face.
First of all, when a female colleague borrows money from you, it is very different from others. That is, the other person "knows you".
The biggest problem with female colleagues borrowing money is that you are "acquaintances".
When a colleague who is more distantly related comes to borrow money, you can make up a reason to send it away, and the other party cannot verify it. You also don't care too much about the outcome of rejecting the other person.
However, heterosexual female colleagues who are still in a good relationship are different. First of all, she knows you well. At the very least, I will only open my mouth to you if I think you are rich and talkative.
Second, you have to find better reasons for your refusal. Otherwise, there will be no face in future exchanges.
Therefore, if you need to reject a female colleague, one of the most important principles is not to push her against you. Men learn these 3 tricks, do not hurt feelings, do not hurt money, but also win the good feelings of female colleagues for you.
01 Ask the reason first, then talk about money
In order to be kind, the first suggestion is to first ask the "reason" for borrowing money.
Many people hear female colleagues want to borrow money, the first reaction is "how much to borrow", subtext tells female colleagues "I have money, but see if you are worth the price in my heart".
Especially when a female colleague makes a request that exceeds your budget, the "feelings" you both have established during that awkward "bargaining" period disappear.
Finally, since the female colleague wants 3000, you lend her hundreds, you are worried that the other party will not pay back, the female colleague still thinks that you are stingy, and the female colleague's impression of you has plummeted.
So, when a female colleague borrows money, the first thing you have to do is show concern: "Why do you suddenly borrow money?" Have you encountered any difficulties? ”
By asking a female colleague to prove that you care about her, you can naturally maintain your relationship.
Then ask her why she borrowed money, and suddenly shift the question to the question "Why did you borrow money?"
In the negotiation process of "borrowing money" with the opposite sex, the problem lies in who is the passive party.
If a female colleague says that she borrowed money to buy a bag, or to change a new mobile phone, she will naturally suffer losses. Your rejection will also become easier.
And most importantly, if you find that a female colleague is really having difficulties, even if you can't borrow money, you can send red envelopes to each other for comfort.
If you do this, even if you reject her, the other party will not hate you.
02 Refused on similar grounds to female colleagues
If you don't want to hurt your face, you can't just say "I don't want to lend it to you."
You can "throw the pot at a third party" as well as "I don't have any money".
For example, "Oh, it's a coincidence that my brother-in-law just borrowed ten thousand yuan from me last month, and I don't have any money on hand now." ”
Or" Or" Or" I'm sorry, I want to lend it to you so much, but my wife's money is in my hands, and I can't be the Lord!" ”
This is throwing the "pot" to one's loved ones.
But is this excuse really good? Not really.
This answer, very blunt, just pushes the other party to your other side, and the female colleague will be uncomfortable in her heart.
So, if you really don't want to hurt feelings, "resonating" is the best way to do it. You can choose to reject the reasons that are "similar" to the other person.
For example, if a female colleague borrows money to pay rent, you can say that she wants to pay the mortgage; if the other person says she wants to repay the loan, you say that she owes a few thousand a month.
This means: I'm in the same situation as you are! So, I understand the pain of you borrowing money, but I'm sorry, neither of us has any money...
In this way, after letting female colleagues have a feeling of "pity for the same disease", they can naturally shift from "borrowing money" to "complaining".
03 Help her solve the problem
After the first two steps, you reject the other person and stand on the same front as your female colleague. In order to better maintain the relationship, you can also help her solve the problem.
You can direct the borrowing needs of female colleagues to other ways to borrow money, you can say: I borrowed money in XX some time ago, otherwise you can try it.
If the other person has not tried, she may be able to use this method to get through the difficulties, and she will also thank you for providing this solution and bringing your relationship closer.
Now that you've said you've "borrowed money" too, your female colleagues will quit knowing your difficulties.
If a female colleague borrows all the ways that can be borrowed, it is not enough. At this time, the probability that you can repay the loan by lending her money is even lower.
If you can't find a suitable reason, you can only say that there is a big problem with that person's consumption habits, and the other party just sees you as an "ATM".
Write at the end
In fact, friends and colleagues of the opposite sex help each other, there is nothing wrong with it, what is wrong is that everyone can't grasp the measure.
Borrow money from colleagues of the opposite sex, preferably explain the reason, offer to pay interest, repayment date, etc. If you are honest and keep your word, you can maintain good popularity even if you borrow money from others.