Parents will always be unable to help but yell at them when they see their children being mischievous, but once they find that this method is easier to use, whenever the child is disobedient, the parents will yell and threaten as soon as they open their mouths.
Some parents are more and more grumpy because of this, they will not speak well in front of their children, and will only use angry tone to educate, but blame the child for not obeying, making themselves like this, or feeling that they have mastered the secrets of parenting.
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In fact, yelling is the most undesirable form of education.
Parents can also hurt their children in the process of "educating" them.
Do you know what happens to a child's body after being yelled at?
1) Getting dumber
Feeling that children are not smart is an important reason for parents to yell at them, and whenever they help with homework, these voices will come from some families:
"What time is it, still watching TV, not starting homework yet!"
"Got it?" I don't understand it yet. ”
"I'll give you a study, and you'll get that kind of grade."
In addition, it may also be accompanied by the sound of parents arguing and tapping the table.
But in this case, children can't say that they have heard the teachings of their parents, their brains may not be able to concentrate on thinking about the problem, and their hearts are very afraid and stressed, and even the problems they will do have forgotten how to solve them.
Harvard professors have found that children who are often yelled at will have an increase in the volume of gray matter in the left temporal gyrus of the brain, and the connection between the Wernicke region and the prefrontal lobe will also decrease.
It also means that these children's memory, judgment, and language expression ability will become weaker and weaker, so they will be more stupid.
2) The temper is getting worse and worse
Children who have been yelled at by their parents for a long time will also unconsciously want to lose their temper with people who have a good relationship and in the process of getting along.
Some netizens said that they were scolded by their mothers since they were young, and they felt scared as soon as they heard her voice, and they didn't know what harsh words they would hear, but in the process of getting along, she also developed the same personality.
I like to use grumpy words to fight against the hurt my mother has done to herself, but because of this, when I get along with friends and lovers, I will do the same, and as a result, I will hurt other people.
Fortunately, after being away from home for a while, with the help of friends and lovers, it has also changed.
3) Become inferior
Some introverted children, after being yelled at by their parents, are prone to think of "how can I be so stupid, always making them angry" and "how I can't do anything", and deny themselves again and again in their hearts.
Over time, you will become more and more inferior, feel that you can't do anything well, and don't dare to try.
4) The appearance of a flattering personality
Children who are self-denying after being yelled at often think that if I didn't do that just now, my parents wouldn't lose their temper, and in the process of getting along with others, they would also sacrifice themselves because they were afraid of others' denial and dislike.
These children will also feel very tired and easy to suffer losses in the process of getting along with others.
5) Be indecisive
No matter what the child does, when they will be yelled at by their parents, the pressure they feel from their parents will become greater and greater, and in order to protect themselves, they will begin to close themselves off, and they will have no desire to explore the outside world.
No matter what decisions you make, the first thing to consider is not yourself, but what your parents and other people think, becoming indecisive, often missing opportunities, or achieving nothing.
6) Increasingly rebellious
Some extroverted children, after being yelled at by their parents, will have the question "Why do they do this to me?" "I'm going to win back, "I'm not going to do what they ask" and other ideas.
At this time, parents will be more and more strict, or directly let go, but it will lead to children deliberately skipping class, early love, and developing on the wrong path.
Why do parents want to yell at their children?
▼It is related to mood changes
A child-rearing couple in the United States, through the survey found that the emotional ups and downs of the parents during the day are very large, when they get up in the morning, they will fall a little, and when they come home from work, the mood will drop to the freezing point.
At this time, if the child just makes him unhappy, he will start to lose his temper.
▼ Affected by the brain
If parents find out about their children's mischievous things through words, they will be less angry, and if they see it with their own eyes after returning home, it is easy to trigger the emotional stress mechanism and start to lose their temper at once.
When the child is naughty, parents who always use an angry attitude to solve the problem are of course more likely to be angry.
▼Influenced by elders
Many people who were criticized by their parents as adults when they were young will unconsciously reproduce their parents' education methods when raising their children.
Previous parents, who had no culture and did not understand the method of educating their children, felt that scolding was the most effective, and their children also agreed with this way of education over time.
How to control your emotions when you yell at your child?
★ Don't bring emotions home
If you feel that you are not in a good mood today, it is best to let other family members tutor the child so as not to anger them.
★ Soothe the child
If parents can't control their emotions when they are angry, then after the roar, it is best to comfort them and tell them that they still love them, so as to avoid the child's insecurity and the above negative changes.
Parental verbal violence is too harmful to children, and it is difficult to recover, I hope that everyone will consider more when they lose their temper.
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