Over the years, fertility rates have been declining, and one of the main reasons is the question of who gives birth to children. In the past, women rarely went out to work, and the responsibility for bringing children was unshirkable to women. Now many women not only have jobs, but also careers are an important part of their lives for them, and they are not willing to give up their careers for their children.
Many women in the mate selection conditions, there is an old man in the family can help with the baby, seemingly absurd conditions, in fact, reasonable. However, now the best age for childbearing is after 80.90, this generation belongs to the only child is more, the woman's own parents are also retired at home, can also help with children.
Grandma and grandma with baby, there are two obvious differences, the child can tell who is who at a glance, such an answer directly pokes the heart. For traditional Chinese thought, children are generally brought by grandmothers, which is also caused by many reasons. The surname of the child and the father naturally belongs to the people in the father's family, and the grandmother is also a family, so naturally brings more to the grandmother.
Grandma with baby, many families are forced to helpless, grandma is inconvenient, or grandma is gone. In addition, there is a common reason, that is, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not harmonious. However, now many mothers are only children, grandma has no grandchildren, and she is also very happy to take grandchildren, so there is a situation where grandma and grandma are equally divided with babies.
For the baby, the person who grows up may be different, but it is still the grandmother's family, which makes the grandmother naturally feel unbalanced in her heart and feel that she is raising a white-eyed wolf. Why it doesn't matter whether the grandmother or the grandmother brings, why the baby is still the grandmother's home, the main reason is that in the baby's heart, it is also different from the close. In the baby's heart, he is a member of his grandmother's family, and his grandmother is a relative and an outsider. I don't always spend time with myself.
In most families in China, couples live with their in-laws, which is the most important reason why children feel that their grandmother is their family. There are also their own and grandfather's surnames, which also makes the child more firmly believe that he and his grandparents' family are together and will always be together. Even if he was brought up by his grandmother and lived in her grandmother's house, he would leave sooner or later.
In addition to the concept of intimacy, grandma spoils her grandson so that the baby will be more willing to be close to grandma. When grandma takes the baby, in order to fulfill her responsibility of carrying the baby, she usually has strict requirements for the baby, such as not giving the child too many snacks, and not giving the child too much free play time. Grandma will not have so many concerns, and whatever the child wants, it is unconditionally satisfied. The world of children is very simple, who meets their own requirements, is close to the people, will not think of the usual grandmother's efforts.
Under normal circumstances, grandma takes children, and only when the children are in kindergarten. After this stage, the child will still return to the parents. Children at this stage will not remember many things. With the passage of time, the memory is even weaker, if the grandmother's family is farther away from his home, the child feels that the grandmother is just a distant relative, and will not be so close to the family.
The old man with the baby, after all, there are drawbacks, whether it is a grandmother or a grandmother, it is not as good as the child's parents. Even if there are many practical problems, especially in the case of insufficient family income, it is inevitable for bao moms to go to work, and they can only choose to let the elderly in the family do the work. Many now bao moms will choose a compromise way, which can earn money to support their families or bring a baby, which is why many bao moms now start to shoot short videos as self-media.
Parents take their children by themselves, let children enjoy more fatherly and maternal love, and live in a loving environment for a long time, more confident and kinder. Parents are younger and more open-minded than the elderly in the family, allowing children to get a greater degree of freedom.
But now many parents are really busy. In order to achieve self-worth, work is also an important part of life. If the economic conditions are acceptable, you can choose to hire a nanny, so that there is no delay in going to work and taking the baby, and the elderly can also have their own old age life. You don't have to sacrifice your square dancing and travel time to take your baby.
When choosing a nanny, also pay attention to safety. Especially when the baby is small, the baby does not have language ability at this time, even if the nanny has bad behavior towards the baby, the baby can not feedback to the parents. It is best to be introduced by acquaintances or relatives, so that it is more secure. You can also install a camera at home, and you have time to observe the situation at home. Prevention is still very important, and it is also a helpless choice to bring children to the nanny.
Of course, Grandma and Grandma also have to put themselves in the right place. If the child is brought to the grandmother, the grandmother must not treat the grandson as an outsider, if she is brought with the grandson, the grandson is treated differently, which will leave a psychological shadow on the grandson. If the grandmother takes the baby, she cannot coddle without principles, but also has principles to make the children better children.