I once envied Su Shi's father and son, who were full of talents, and longed for the calligraphy of Wang Xizhi's father and son, until I knew him, I didn't know that the truly excellent parents were like this.
Having 9 children, both men and women, everyone has made an important contribution to the country, the world calls it "one discipline and three academicians, nine sons are talented". He is Liang Qichao, and his best identity is his father.
Edit the search image
Please click to enter the image description (up to 18 words)
Eldest daughter: Liang Sishun, a well-known expert in poetry research.
Eldest son: Liang Sicheng, founded the Department of Architecture of Northeastern University, the first academician of the Academia Sinica, the founder of modern Chinese architecture, and his wife is still a talented woman Lin Huiyin.
Second son: Liang Siyong, also the first academician of the Academia Sinica, is an important founder of the archaeological community.
Third son: Liang Sizhong, a highly talented student at the U.S. Military Academy, served as an officer in the National Revolutionary Army.
Second daughter: Liang Sizhuang, working in the library of Peking University, an important founder of library science.
Fourth son: Liang Sida, a famous economist and business administrator.
Third daughter: Liang Siyi, a member of the National Committee of the Chinese People's Political Consultative Conference and a well-known social activist.
Fourth daughter: Liang Sining, joined the New Fourth Army and became an old revolutionary.
Fifth son: Liang Sili, rocket system control expert, academician of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, real scientist. 9 children, each of them is leading the world in their respective fields, and their achievements are inseparable from Liang Qichao.
Although Liang Qichao's time with the children is limited, he has always insisted on writing letters to each child, and according to statistics, there are hundreds of letters written to the children. In the letter, Liang Qichao cares about the child's learning as a friend, discovers the child's interest, discovers the child's interest, explores the child's ability, and guides the child's growth.
1
respect
There is a scene in "Three Fools in Bollywood": at 5:15, the male protagonist Fahan is born. At 5:16, the father announced that my son would become an engineer.
Since then, Fahanyi's fate has been fixed, and he has been running on the road to becoming an engineer. No one cared what he really wanted to do.
All parents in the world are the same, eager to prepare the best for their children, willing to teach all their experiences, and strive to arrange their children's future paths, just to make their children take fewer detours. But not a single parent asked: Child, what do you want to do?
Once, "Galaxy Tuition Class" was popular all over the Internet, and what impressed me the most was the dialogue between Ma Fei and Ma Haowen's father and son: "What do you want to do when you grow up?" "Peking University, my mother said."
Now that I think about it, how creepy it is. The arranged life is so sad, fortunately Ma Fei met Ma Haowen, who returned from prison.
Ma Haowen, who had made mistakes, put down his body in order to get close to his son and be friends with his son. Eat together, live together, play together, learn together. Infecting your son from your own words and deeds is not telling your son that you are wrong as a father.
Mrs. Gandhi once said that the love and respect of young people for their parents comes from suppressing their own wishes and hobbies, giving up their own choices, and succumbing to their parents' wishes. This pain suppresses their enthusiasm and the joy of life. Children are a continuation of life, not a sequel to a dream. Be a parent, put down your stature, be a friend, and respect his every choice.
2
A sense of boundaries
Teacher Wu Zhihong once mentioned a logic - paste logic: the boundaries between people, like paste, are chaotic. Once saw a news: at 11 o'clock in the middle of the night, the police received a strange report - the 18-year-old daughter took scissors and fought with her father.
Isn't the daughter the father's little cotton jacket? Why is this cotton jacket still black heart cotton clip needle?
It turned out that during the epidemic, my daughter was taking online classes at home, which should have been the time of class, and my daughter was still lying in bed playing with her mobile phone. The father could not see it, so he took a video of his daughter in bed and posted it to the group, calling on the common group friends to criticize the daughter.
At the age of 18, it is the time to love face, and the daughter feels particularly wronged. Who knows, at more than 10 o'clock, the father drank some wine, shouted his daughter outside the door that no one should respond, and directly pushed the door in.
As soon as the quilt was lifted, I saw my daughter playing with her mobile phone and began to count down again.
Who knows, the daughter directly picked up the scissors and confronted her father. The father entered his daughter's bedroom without knocking on the door, not to mention that the daughter was 18 years old, and took a video of her daughter in bed without her permission, violating her privacy.
This kind of behavior without a sense of boundaries is actually not uncommon. In the recent hit variety show "Mother-in-law and Mother", Zhang Duo's mother made a mistake.
On the first day of living together, the diligent mother-in-law was ready to wash the family's clothes. Early in the morning, she was worried that her son and daughter-in-law were sleeping, and directly pushed the door in to get a change of clothes. Before leaving, he also helped his son cover the quilt.
Breaking into his son's room without permission and helping his 40-year-old son cover a quilt may be a concern of Chinese parents.
Hold up the banner of love for your children and walk freely in the world of your children. There is a saying in "Silent Confessions": The care of parents is like snow, constantly falling on you, and will eventually crush you.
No matter how intimate the relationship, it is also necessary to maintain a sense of boundaries and reserve a space for children to breathe freely.
3
Go with the flow
There was a survey on the website where the numbers are shocking: 34% of adults spend 30 days with their parents each year, 20% with less than 30 days, 24% with children who spend 7 to 9 days, and 22% spend less than 7 days with each other.
As a parent, separation anxiety is more severe than that of children. Not long ago, an 8-minute cartoon without a single line, "Bao Bao", went viral.
The woman was at home alone, lonely and bored. Suddenly one day, a small bun turned into a "person" and called the woman's mother.
Ecstatic women with bun babies go shopping, eating, and living together. As the days passed, the bun babies grew up. When I wanted to play with other children, I was carried home by my worried mother, and after repeated arguments, the bun baby shut her mother out of the door.
The sad mother did a lot of things to please the baby, but what she got was the back of the bun head that did not return, and could only watch him run out of the house.
Until one day, the bun actually took his girlfriend home, and to the mother's horror, the bun baby actually came back to pack his luggage and leave the house completely.
The mother who could not stop it finally ate the baby bun in one bite, so that the baby could no longer be separated from himself.
The director of "Bao Bao" confessed the original intention of shooting this short film: when the parents love their children to the extreme, in order not to let the children leave, they will even ruin the children. Parents have to learn to let go.
The child is the kite in the hands of the parents, and only by letting go can the kite fly higher. Fulfillment is the best respect that parents give their children. The departure of a child is the biggest test facing parents, because it is a fateful failure. British psychologist Claire said: The real success of parents is to separate their children from your life.
The love of the world is all for the sake of keeping each other, only the love of parents, only to wait for separation, like friends, not demanding, gathering and dispersing are all fate.
Respect each other's words and deeds, grasp the measure between each other, and cherish every reunion and separation. Becoming friends is the best way for parents and children to get along.
Author's profile: Zuo Tian, with the heart to understand the life of the bit, with the text to record the world's hundred states. A small master who explores that there is true love in the world and true feelings in the world.