1, almost off the highway when the car ran out of gas, I said to my wife: "Do you believe it or not, we go to the service area of the exit to refuel, without giving money can go?" Naturally, the wife did not believe it. Add in the service area

1, almost off the highway when the car ran out of gas, I said to my wife: "Do you believe it or not, we go to the service area of the exit to refuel, without giving money can go?" Naturally, the wife did not believe it. After refueling in the service area, I said to the staff: "I didn't bring money, ask your webmaster to come and see what to do?" After a while, a young man came over, and as soon as he saw me, he said helplessly to the staff: "Let him go, that is my old uncle Lai, I will pay for the oil." ”

2. At night, accompany your wife to watch Zhen Huan's biography. After watching for a while, I suddenly smiled and said: Wife, I only spent more than a thousand on the driving license I took ten years ago, and now I want more than six thousand, so if I calculate, save more than five thousand for our family, can you see if you can send it to me as pocket money? My wife listened, stared at me for a while, and smiled: You only took ten thousand when we got married, and now it has risen to more than one hundred thousand, I saved you more than ninety thousand, sent you more than five thousand, how much should you make up for me?

3. Last night, my wife suddenly wanted to eat durian, so she bought a whole at the fruit supermarket. Every time I drink with my father-in-law, the old man complains that my mother-in-law has been punished with kneeling durian, and I am very curious and want to try it. So I took control and knelt on it and hissed: Kneel durian, but that's it! At this time, someone in the back pressed: Now? My pig-like scream suddenly sounded: I go, who is this? Looking back, it was the old man!?

4. Just got married for a month! I went back to my house this evening and got a call on my phone while I was having dinner. "Hey, kid! Haven't you eaten? I'm your dad! As soon as I heard it, I was furious: "Grandson! Who are you fooling?" My dad was eating right next to me! Find smoking stuff in the daytime! "After saying that, I threw my phone on the couch and continued to eat." After a while, my father suddenly looked up and said, "Will it be your father-in-law..."

5. When I went to the hospital today, I was in front of a student. The student said: Doctor, I feel that I am recent, and my sleep is a little abnormal. The doctor asked: What are the symptoms of this? The student said: I wake up at eight o'clock every day now. I heard the doctor say particularly helplessly: This morning at eight o'clock, it is time to wake up! girl......

6, girlfriend is a woman, I told her to make a bottle cap can not be unscrewed to be a petite woman to have pain, she said to accept my advice. Yesterday, she took a can of silver heron eight treasure porridge weakly walked to the male god of her crush: Brother Li, help me to tear it up, I am afraid that if I don't tear it well, I will hurt my hand. Brother Li smiled, took it and tore open the bottle, and gently handed it to his girlfriend. The girlfriend was particularly happy to see Brother Li's performance, and naturally a handful of eight treasure porridge was poured over, and she looked up and took a sip. After drinking, he wiped his mouth with his big hand and howled: "It's so delicious...?"

7, to be late, the speed has been soared to 60 miles. As a result, when turning the corner, I accidentally scraped down an old lady, jumped down, quickly got out of the car, and said: "Sister, are you okay?" The old lady patted the soil on her body and said, "The boy's mouth is so sweet, sister is all right, you go!" "Alas, it is good to react quickly, silently get on my shared bicycle and continue to race!"

8. When the niece learned martial arts with the abbot when she was a child, she ran amok in school, and the boys did not dare to provoke her. That time, a boy in the class was beaten and cried by her, and he called his father. The parent was more reasonable, saying that his son did not show up, was beaten by the girl and complained in the face. The next day, the niece beat a boy in the next class to cry, and he also called the parents. I didn't expect it to be the uncle, this time the uncle said to my niece with a black face: "Little girl, you are a bit excessive, yesterday just beat my son, today actually beat my brother again, how do you let me talk to my mother?" ”"

9, since ancient times, there has been such a strange phenomenon, when borrowing money is the grandfather, once it is time to ask for money, it becomes a grandson, which is not false at all. I sent a small is like this, even if I borrowed 2,000 yuan, I have not paid it back so far. One day he called me and said, "Brother, is my sister-in-law at home?" There is something wrong with her. I was stunned that this boy did not borrow money, so I asked him: I am at home, what are you looking for my wife? This cargo was immediately exposed and said: Is this brother, can you give me 500 yuan to save the emergency? I immediately shouted: Daughter-in-law has your phone!?

10. My girlfriend came home from class and found it very late to take a taxi. After getting in the car, I didn't feel right. The driver ran the car to the new development zone, she was afraid, so she said, trouble you stop, I went down to the toilet, the driver stopped, but has been far behind her, she can't run away, she found a tree, pretending to be a boy going to the toilet to pull the zipper, after a while also shake a hand, and then look back, the driver decisively drove the car and ran!?

11. My son borrowed ten yuan from me and promised to pay me back in the future. I said fool, you are my son, you don't have to pay back my money. The son leaned back on his chin and proudly replied, "How can that be!" If you kidnap this morality and force me to say that Daddy's little wallet is hidden in the big vase on the left side of the balcony, it will be bad! ”

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #