1. At noon, take a nap with the female ticket. The female ticket answered a phone call and didn't know what was said inside. She replied, "My husband is back, next time." Suddenly, I was completely sleepy and sat down at once

1. At noon, take a nap with the female ticket. The female ticket answered a phone call and didn't know what was said inside. She replied, "My husband is back, next time." Suddenly, I was completely drowsy and sat up at once. The female ticket seemed to know something and said, "My girlfriend invited me to go shopping." Then casually asked, "Where do you want to go?" ”

2. During the blind date, the other party said that he wanted to go to the bathroom and did not come back for a long time. I realized that the other party should have run away, so I called the waiter to pay the bill. When they were ready to leave, they met their high school classmates, so the two of them sat down again and began to reminisce, when the blind date came over......... After looking at me for a while, he jumped out and said, "So, am I going back to wait for the notice????

3) I'm a video creator who often works until five in the morning before going to bed, so there's no morning in my world. Once, when I was out collecting materials, I met a girl who had a good chat with her, so I added friends. I gradually fell in love with her, and always chatted with her late at night until dawn. Once I plucked up enough courage to ask her, "Do you like me?" The girl said: "I like mature people, and the sign of maturity is to learn to go to bed early." "Later, I learned to go to bed early. The girl felt very relieved, because no one bothered her at night anymore.

4. On this day, the abbot and Shitai ran happily under the cherry blossom trees. Suddenly Shi Tai stepped on a lump of dog SHI and fell, his knees on the ground, his eyes tearful. But the abbot did not help her, but took out the Huawei P50 mobile phone. Then he shot from all angles, and Shi was so angry that he lay on the ground and cried. The abbot put away his mobile phone: "The ground is cold, hurry up!" I've already taken a photo for you, wait enough for you to send space, circle of friends, vbo. ”?

5. The grandmother staggered to the China Merchants Bank to withdraw money. Handed a passbook to the female teller and said: Girl, give me 5,000 yuan, my wife is sick, see a doctor! The female teller said without anger: Twenty thousand or less cash to go to the ATM! Grandma said: I won't get that! I can't see clearly, you helped me get it! The female teller did not look up and said: No, this is the bank regulation! Granny: So how much can you take at most? Female teller: As much as you want, this is the bank, some are money. Granny: Then take out all the money in my passbook! The female teller swiped, showing the balance of more than 50 million yuan, suddenly stunned, quickly apologized to the grandmother! Then the lobby manager came out to drive away the female teller and personally took 5,000 yuan for the grandmother. "

6. Yesterday afternoon I came home from vacation and told my mother that I was hungry. My mother said to me: I'll go and fry you a bowl of egg fried rice! I felt so good at home eating egg fried rice, and then my dad came back and told my mom that he was hungry. My mom replied, "Wait a minute, I'll go make you a few dishes now." I looked at my egg fried rice and I was sure I was biological.?

7. In order to get his son admitted to a good university, the rich man spent a lot of money to send his son to Huanggang High School. Since then, my son has been in high school outside the home and can only come back once every six months. On this day, the son called the rich man and said that the school would charge a make-up tuition fee, three hundred yuan, and wanted to have more points, so he said that he would charge three hundred and fifty yuan. As a result, I did not expect the rich man to say to his wife: Wife, son collects supplementary tuition fees, three thousand!

8. The sister-in-law worked in a foreign factory for three years, did not save a penny, and after returning home, she tangled with 200,000 yuan and opened a cosmetics store. On this day, the sister-in-law was looking at the shop in the shop, and a rich woman dressed in mink came... Rich Woman: "Do you have multi-functional skin beautification products here?" Sister-in-law: "It depends on your needs." Rich woman: "I don't like to take a lot of cosmetics out of the house, I need a set of oil, sweat, moisture, moisture, does not hurt the skin, the price is more reasonable beauty products, do you have here?" Sister-in-law: "I'm sorry, we don't have it here, but the supermarket opposite sells it." Rich Woman: "Really! What is your name? Sister-in-law: "The newly shelved Superman laundry detergent has a strong ability to remove oil, sweat odor, does not hurt the skin, is white and fresh, and is your ideal choice." ”

9. Recently, my wife froze my pocket money, and I couldn't even smoke a pack of cigarettes for five dollars. Last night, I accidentally saw that my son had a lot of change in his box, and I was ready to steal a few pieces to buy cigarettes, and I was afraid that my son would cry after he knew, so I decided to use the bitter meat meter. As soon as I finished cleaning the dishes and coming out, I went to my son's room and pretended to be pitiful to him, telling him how miserable I was now and how cruel his mother was. The son did not say a word after listening to the second word, ran to the room and came out with a small box. Then, he ran straight to his mother and said, "Mom, can you keep it for me for a few days?" I always felt that this money was never safe in my hands!

10. After arriving at the company, the manager asked me in surprise: "Are you working out?" Notice that your hips are upturned. I said, "Yes, practice pull-ups at home." Manager: "The effect is very obvious, how many days has this been practicing?" Me: "Just last night, I pulled the door frame upwards and pulled the door down, and my husband swollen my ass with a broom." ”

11, after watching so many strategies to chase my girlfriend, today I plucked up the courage to start my road of chasing my girlfriend, and waited downstairs at her house for half a day to finally see her coming. According to the instructions on the strategy, a large bouquet of roses was plucked from the back like a trick: "Dangdangdang!" Flowers with beauties! The goddess frowned and took two steps back. Seeing that the opportunity was not good, I quickly took the flowers away and asked, "Are you allergic to flowers?" Goddess: "No, allergic to cow dung." ”???"

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #