During the lunch break, the female colleague whispered, "Brother, let's have an appointment tonight, pretending to be the kind." I was indifferent, and the female colleague said: "It is not okay to give money, 300 an hour, my mother will introduce me."

During the lunch break, the female colleague whispered, "Brother, let's have an appointment tonight, pretending to be the kind." I was indifferent, and the female colleague said: "It is not okay to give money, 300 an hour, my mother introduced me to the blind date, you pretend to be my boyfriend." "300 an hour, which is higher than the salary for a day at work, I promised to come down." In the evening, I came to the restaurant as promised, and there was only one female colleague and no blind date. The female colleague said we ate first. She ordered Western food and red wine, which was delicious, but until after eating, I still didn't see the blind date, and I weakly asked: "He didn't come, it's none of my business, 300 hours, no problem!" The female colleague glanced at me and suddenly asked, "Brother." Otherwise we fake the drama and really do it, and you will be my boyfriend. "The female colleague is very beautiful, I heard that there is a mine at home, but I still refused, I accompanied her to dinner for 2 hours, 600 yuan remuneration... She must not have wanted to give money anymore.

2. Some time ago, I spent 19.9 yuan online to buy a special fishing rod. When the goods arrived, I gave the online store a bad review because the fishing rod was too strong. Just after the review, customer service called me to ask why I gave a bad review. I'll tell you the truth: I secretly bought it with a month's private money, and when the courier arrived, my daughter-in-law was at home, and finally, she smoked me more than fifty times with a fishing rod!

3. When I was idle at home, I went to my little shop to help. At that time, an uncle came to the store to pick up the courier. Only to see him wait while complaining: this loser lady has been shopping online all day, and she doesn't know what to buy. After I gave it to him, he took a look at it, nervously took a step backwards and said: These ladies, what is not good to buy, actually bought a washboard, quickly return it to me.

4. My foodie sister called me to say she was in the hospital and asked me to come over. After I learned that my sister had given birth, I was surprised to say: It was less than nine months, and I was born! The sister's husband said helplessly: My poor child was squeezed out by the stomach. I was confused: Ah, last night at my aunt's house, my brother-in-law is a big chef, cooking delicious, she can't eat well, she still has to eat, and as a result, when she comes back at night, her stomach hurts!

5. Once upon a time, there was a person who liked to take advantage of small profits to buy guiyuan on the street. He stopped in front of a guiyuan stall and twisted a few into his mouth. The seller said busily: Sweet or not? No sweet no money! He shook his head, went to the second stall, ate a few guiyuan, and came to the third stall... Finally, with a full burp, he came to the tenth stall: Is this cinnamon ball sweet or not? The boss said: No sweet, no money! He said lightly: Then give me a pound that is not sweet!

6. Every time I go downstairs to the barbershop, I cut my hair! Every haircut is done without moving in the middle of the light on both sides. Last night, I stayed up late practicing XIAN to read novels, and today I am particularly sleepy and confused. Hairdresser: How to cut it? Me: Don't move on both sides, push the light in the middle. Then fell into a half-dream, half-awake, when the barber finished cutting and woke me up, alas... It's all tears!

7. I work in the kitchen of the unit and am usually responsible for the procurement and storage of food. Seeing a few big fat rats sneaking past, I got an orange cat, and as a result, the goods did not work. No way, I bought a few sticky rat boards and put the sticky mouse board in the corner when I got off work. The next day to open the door, first go to see the sticky mouse board in the corner, think there is a big harvest, did not expect that the cat lying on the sticky mouse board motionless, meowing and wailing, the mouse did not stick to one!

8. Yesterday the rich second generation went to work without any problems, chatting with a beautiful woman, and the beautiful woman said indignantly: My boyfriend is very ugly. Fu Er Dai comforted: Don't say that about your boyfriend. Beauty said: Well, I am not modest, everyone recognizes as ugly. FuErdai asked: How ugly is it? Beauty said: This is not easy to say. Fu Er Dai Youdao: So, if you give me 70 points, how many points will you give him? Beauty said without hesitation: 69 points!

 #Funny# #搞笑段子 #