Wen | the original diary of The Little Fish Daddy, welcome to forward and share personally
When we live in an era that is more and more superior, every family hopes to give better to the child, but is the "one brain" type of love really the love that the child needs, the so-called best love?
I think everyone's answer is no, but in reality, when it is really done, it is not clear.
Again, don't confuse doting with love, and don't let love for your child become a poison that hurts your child's growth.
Please give your child a chance to grow
"I spent 8 years and raised my child into a waste", please take a look at the negative example of this pair of parents.
In a variety show, the eight-year-old boy tells the story of his real life, and every morning before his eyes are fully opened, his father will come into the house to feed him.
Of course, the subsequent dressing and washing are done by the father or mother, and the meal also needs to be fed, and the mother also wears shoes for herself when she goes out after eating.
In short, it sounds as if everything other than chewing and walking is done by the parents.
Is this something to be envied? Is this a parenting achievement worth bragging about? Of course not. This is the sadness of family education, this is the typical portrayal of pampering and loving becoming coddling unconsciously.
The child may not be really lazy, just accustomed to the giving of parents, but if this habit is not corrected in time, it is likely to make the child grow into a selfish and incompetent person who only knows how to accept and take, and does not know gratitude and return.
Losing the ability to survive is tantamount to dying
How lazy can a person be? The answer is to starve to death.
This is by no means sensational, Henan boy Yang Suo used his own personal experience to teach parents and children a vivid and tragic lesson.
He was born in the countryside, and although his family conditions were somewhat poor, his parents sheltered him from all the wind and rain and gave him the greatest love.
Yang Suo grew up spoiled by his family from childhood, shoulders without burdens, feet without mud, is a very accurate description of him. Because of the long-term care of his family, he is not only lazy, but also unaware of the meaning of independent survival.
The room with the family taking care of it is his favorite and most comfortable place.
After leaving the campus, Yang Suo was unable to enter the society normally, and after the death of his father, his mother still fed him three meals a day in addition to doing farm work.
But this kind of life can not last a lifetime, after the death of his mother, Yang Suo is still waiting for someone to serve, but his parents are long gone.
To this end, he constantly sold his belongings to buy things to make a living, and burned all the wood products in the house to keep warm because it was too cold, including the bed.
In the end, he could only curl up on the ground and be starved to death in the real "four walls" environment.
The help and persuasion of relatives did not give him the intention of going out to work to earn money, because psychologically and physically, he had become a "wasted man".
Inappropriate love for children can turn into poison, and their future end can be imagined.
It is a natural law for children to grow up in the process of constantly learning new skills, and parents should guide and help in time to let children exercise independently, rather than depriving them of this opportunity.
Only through practice can children experience the joy of hands-on labor and understand the hardships and difficulties of their parents.
Are you also hurting your child in the name of love? If so, please change it as soon as possible!
Distinguish between love and coddling
Some parents will love to the extreme, and even become spoiled;
Some parents are because they lacked the love of their families when they were young, and when they grew up, they made up their minds not to let their children live the same childhood, so they doubled what they did not get when they were young and what their parents failed to do for themselves.
These ideas are understandable, but we must grasp the scale and distinguish between love and doting.
Love is to give timely guidance and help when children need it;
And coddling is to complete everything for the child, do not look at whether the child needs, do not look at whether the child is happy because of it, parents think that as long as they do what they want to do, even if they have successfully completed the task of taking care of their children.
What is thought-provoking is that this kind of love, which seems to be unrequited and powerful, is actually gradually eating away at the child's ability to work and the sense of labor, and eventually making the child an incompetent and selfish person.
If you want your child to become a person who will be surrounded by misfortune in the future, then you will be obedient to him from an early age.
Coddling is not true love, but to raise the child into a waste, can not protect the child's healthy and strong growth, can only become a stumbling block on the road to the child's talent.