1. Play cards with the female manager, lose an afternoon, lose, still owe her 20,000, she said let me send her home, a minus 200, the result of the next few months I will be her special driver

1. Play cards with the female manager, lose an afternoon, lose, still owe her 20,000, she said let me send her home, a reduction of 200, the result of the next few months I will be her special driver, on call, really enough!

2. When I was dropping my wife off to work in the morning, I passed by a hot pot restaurant. There was a guy who was sand sheep in front of the store, and his wife said sadly: This sheep is so pitiful! In the evening, I took my wife to eat hot pot, and I happened to go to this restaurant to eat hot pot. My wife ordered a lamb hot pot, during which I asked my wife: Didn't you still pity it this morning? The 1+1 goods wife thought for a while and replied: Hmm... Worthy of my pity for it, this meat is so delicious! I...... Speechless!

3. The husband works at the Tobacco Bureau, and because the work environment is particularly addictive, at least two packs of Chinese chinese per day. Recently, because of the face of retirement, the addiction is getting bigger and bigger, and three packs of soft Chinese a day are almost unbearable. The mother-in-law was particularly worried about his body and had recently been asking him to quit smoking. The mother-in-law often persuades bitterly: Eat snacks! Oh melon seeds! Chew gum! Can quit smoking. After insisting on it for a month, the mother-in-law threw a pack of soft Chinese to the old man and said: You still smoke, I think you may die faster than smoking!

4. In the evening, we gathered with the buddies we hadn't seen for a long time, and in the end everyone drank too much, and only one of them always stayed awake. I remember that he used to drink the worst, and now he is so strong. I said, "You can practice this amount of wine." The buddy smiled and said, "Do you want to learn?" Several buddies nodded their heads, and the buddies mysteriously took out a photo from their wallets and showed it to us. Then we all threw up...

5. My wife and I spent our honeymoon and stayed in the hotel at night to rest. The wife said, "If there is a bugging device in the room, our words will be heard by outsiders, how embarrassed." "I hurried around and found a button-sized metal object under the window, so I twisted it down hard and threw it away. The next day, the manager asked, "Did you guys have a good rest last night?" I said, "Very well, your hotel is good." Manager: "The pair downstairs is really unlucky, the chandelier on the ceiling fell off last night!" ”

6. The college entrance examination was abnormal, only 180 points, I decided to give up studying and go to work. I worked in an electronics factory in Shenzhen for a month, and today my mother called me. Mom: You should find a girlfriend, if you look for a girlfriend, don't just look at the face, the key is to have a good heart! Pretty is useless, and it's the same when you're old. Dad chimed in on the side: Yes, your mother is right! Hang up the phone Dad sent me a message: Don't listen to your mother, be sure to find a beautiful, angry and comfortable!

7. When children see something strange, they will love it. Yesterday Xiaoming picked up a magnet stone, and then carried it during school, in class, the teacher found Xiaoming deserting, so he wanted to confiscate his toys. Teacher, as soon as she reached out, the iron absorbing stone was sucked on her gold ring... That's a gold ring that cost 20,000 dollars, a gold ring.

8. Sold 32 apartments in a week, the owner rewarded me with a Maybach. After work, I passed the supermarket, and I went in to buy a bottle of red wine and go home to celebrate. When I got home and found the door hidden, I remembered that the cigarette in my pocket had not been paid. I hurried back to the supermarket in the Maybach: "I'm sorry, I forgot to check out the cigarette I just took." The cashier looked at me lightly and did not intend to check out for me. The female colleague next to her asked her, "What is he doing?" The cashier sister gave me a blank look and said, "I just came to talk to me, don't worry about her." I looked at the freckles on her face, hey...

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