Wen | Purple Leaf Girl
What is the most basic bottom line of the marriage relationship? The writer Lu Jun once said:
"The union of marriage requires that both spouses be faithful, and fidelity is the most sacred of all rights."
A stable marriage relationship must be based on the absolute loyalty of both parties to each other, marriage because of love to form a new family, respect for marriage, is responsible for the other party, love and marriage complement each other, if you violate the bottom line of marriage, love, it will no longer exist.
Faithfulness, not abandonment, not a verbal promise, but also from the bits and pieces of married life, if one party has made an act of betraying the marriage, timely changes, is the key to saving a broken marriage; if the heart is revenge, in the other way, but also give the other body, the final marriage contract, but in name only in name only.
01 Husband eloped with female neighbor to live together, father: not a day of peace
Nearly a year of huajia Wang Guodong, the family lives in Daqing New Village, Xiangtan City, the son Wang Haibin is the only son in the family, 5 years ago, Wang Haibin was introduced by a friend, finally married and had children, established a happy small family, however, recently the old man of Wang Guodong all night sleepless, he told us that he worked hard to help the family established by his son, facing the crisis of rupture.
As for the reason, Wang Guodong revealed that his son actually abandoned his existing family, eloped with his female neighbor, and lived together.
When we met Wang Guodong, his expression was very depressed, bluntly saying that his son was nearly 30 years old, since his son and daughter-in-law had two people to start a family, there had not been a day of peace, and his only appeal now was that his cheating son could reconcile with his daughter-in-law Pan Yunyun (pseudonym).
At this moment, the daughter-in-law Pan Yunyun, who had just gone downstairs, took out a piece of evidence of her husband's cheating, and in the mobile phone photo album, it was Pan Yunyun's husband's car, parked downstairs in the community where the female neighbor lived.
Pan Yunyun bluntly said that her husband Wang Haibin has been living with her female neighbor Tang Chunli (pseudonym) for more than a month, and she has been arrested several times;
Originally, the female neighbor Tang Chunli lived in a building next to them, and her husband and Tang Chunli were card friends, and now, Tang Chunli bought a new house in a new community, divorced not long ago, with a 7-year-old child, a single mother.
Subsequently, Pan Yunyun took everyone and rushed to Tang Chunli's new residence, and sure enough, her husband Wang Haibin was at Tang Chunli's home and saw Pan Yunyun's arrival, at first, Wang Haibin was not willing to take care of it, until Pan Yunyun said that he wanted to mediate with Wang Haibin that the relationship between the husband and wife broke down, and when the behavior of living with Tang Chunli was inappropriate, Wang Haibin spoke;
Wang Haibin said that he explained to Pan Yunyun very early that if he wanted to divorce, the two people would not have a harmonious relationship, and secondly, he also accused his wife Pan Yunyun of not being a person of good character.
Seeing the couple arguing in the living room, Tang Chunli, who was lying in the bedroom, came out, and Tang Chunli seemed to be righteous and strong for intervening in Pan Yunyun's marriage, and directly issued an eviction order to Pan Yunyun.
After returning home, Pan Yunyun cried softly and confessed that after getting married, her husband Wang Haibin often abused herself, and her married life was not good, he always thought that people outside were sincere to him, and never felt how important his family was.
Not long after, the voice of Wang Haibin came from downstairs, and Wang Haibin actually had an argument with his father Wang Guodong, and almost had a big fight.
So, what contradiction caused this father and son to contradict? Is this matter related to Pan Yunyun?
02 Wife cheats on her husband's little brother, wife: Lonely and lonely at home alone
After some persuasion, Wang Haibin finally calmed down his anger and told us a secret.
Wang Haibin revealed that a few months ago, when he was working outside the home, he received a tip-off from his father, claiming that his wife Pan Yunyun was with other men, and after returning home, Wang Haibin decided to divorce his wife, but was blocked and opposed by his father Wang Guodong.
For his own cheating behavior, Pan Yunyun did not defend, bluntly said that he was indeed crazy outside for a few days, and opened a house with other men, but Pan Yunyun said that it was her husband Wang Haibin who cheated on the female neighbor first, and she made a betrayal of the marriage in order to retaliate against her husband.
The husband makes a mistake, but the wife retaliates against the wife in the same wrong way, Pan Yunyun's behavior, for a while, makes everyone feel speechless, this couple, between each other, lack of due respect and basic sense of morality, what is the reason for it?
Wang Haibin said that after marriage, his wife is a bad habit, loves to play cards, loves to drink, loves to play crazy, and lives a life of spending days and drinking in the night scene every day, ignoring her son's education.
Hearing her husband's accusations, Pan Yunyun also confessed her heart, she told us that when the two people drank together, and finally got drunk, how to go to the hotel, she also forgot; as for the greedy play regardless of home, she said;
"Because when I stay at home alone, the feeling of loneliness and loneliness is very sad, and my husband never calls me to greet me."
For her own wrong behavior, Pan Yunyun deeply introspected, she said that from now on, for the integrity of the family, she will change bad habits, hoping that her husband can also recognize the mistake of betraying the marriage, break off contact with the female neighbor Tang Chunli, and return to the family.
So, will Wang Haibin agree?
Seeing Wang Haibin again, he insisted on divorce and gave the reason, it turned out that Wang Haibin's childhood, his mother loved to play cards, his father was too busy, the fact that he lacked maternal love and father love, has always been the regret of his childhood and the shadow after he grew up, he did not want his own encounter to happen to his son, therefore, resolutely want to divorce.
Secondly, there is another reason, that is, the behavior of his wife Pan Yunyun touched the bottom line of Wang Haibin.
Although it was also a derailment, pan Yunyun's derailment object turned out to be Wang Haibin's friend and brother, which made him feel that his face was dull.
After figuring out the reason for the breakdown of the couple's marriage, no matter how much the mediator persuaded, Wang Haibin's resolute attitude of divorce did not waver for a moment, and seeing this, his father Wang Guodong was no longer willing to interfere in his son's marriage.
Subsequently, Wang Haibin left home with his son. Leaving the old father behind, and at this moment, Pan Yunyun sat alone in the empty bed with a headache and cried, she understood that the mistakes she had made could be corrected, but the lost love could no longer be recovered, she understood that the marital love affair with her husband Wang Haibin had been exhausted, and from then on, the two sides were just the most familiar strangers.
03 The author's emotional summary
The young female writer Xia Qixi once said:
"The appearance of a third person in love is not terrible, the terrible thing is that from then on two people will be wrong, right and wrong, the trust that was once crumbling, and every sentence they question each other is like a gyroscope whirling on the third party, which is what makes love sad." 」
Deeply believed, in marriage, extramarital affairs have been very common, whether it is husband or wife, the cause of extramarital affairs, there are only two points, one is that love returns to flat, lack of freshness; the other is that the spouse can not give the other party the love needed, ignoring the other party's sense of existence.
Marriage, why can't stand the "seven-year itch", there is nothing to do in bed, there is nothing to say under the bed, love, like a glass of water, even if it is placed in the refrigerator, it can not be guaranteed, it will always be clear and sweet; marriage, the same is true, do not know how to operate, do not cultivate feelings, care with heart, the emotional foundation established at the beginning, once it ceases to exist, marriage, what to maintain?
The breakdown of the marriage between Pan Yunyun and Wang Haibin, the first point, is that after the two sides get married, they play for themselves, the two sides do not contact each other, the feelings do not cultivate, can they not break down?
Secondly, the husband Wang Haibin cheated, Pan Yunyun used the same way to retaliate, and even, interacting with her husband's brothers, on the road of retaining marriage, the behavior of going farther and farther away, continuing to maintain, who does not poke the backbone of her husband Wang Haibin, marriage, there is love to go on, loveless marriage, but a chicken feather.
So, do you think it is necessary for Pan Yunyun to keep her husband Wang Haibin?