The author, Tong Qijun, is a well-known commentator on current affairs in China
At about 7:50 a.m. on January 12, a woman squeezed her child's face fiercely on Line 7 of the Beijing subway and made her kneel in public, causing the passengers in the same car to look sideways. Child psychologist Liu Yonghe said that the educational behavior of having children kneel in public has violated the latest laws. (Beijing Youth Daily, January 12)
Satya, a famous American "master of family therapy", believes that a person has an extraordinary connection with his original family, and this connection may affect his life. Perhaps because of this, in the Ming Dynasty thinker Lü Kun's book "Groaning Language", there are some methods for educating children, of which the more famous ones are seven no responsibility and five no complaints, and here it is only said that seven is not responsible. Teach children seven responsibilities: no responsibility for the public; no responsibility for eating; no responsibility for illness; no responsibility for remorse; no responsibility for twilight; no responsibility for celebration; no responsibility for sorrow. It is still applicable in modern family education today, and parents can learn from it.
In the Beijing subway, children are beaten in public and children are kneeling! This parent violated the ancient precept of "not being responsible to the public.". Children are not mature in physical and mental development, so they are more naughty and willful, and parents who reprimand their children can be seen anytime and anywhere in many public places. In public places should give children dignity, many parents in the face of children's mischief when the emotions out of control, simply think that such as "I said my child, I want to let (he) do what to do" can be casually scolded children, so whenever and where to scold the child, so will seriously hurt the child's self-esteem, day after month and month of children are very easy to be cowardly and inferior, closed to themselves, many children encounter parents in public places scolding and punishment, will feel that scolding is commonplace, not only can not play the effect of educating children, On the contrary, it will make them resist or break the can.
How to be a parent is an enduring topic. In 1919, Lu Xun called for "saving children" in the article "How Do We Be Fathers Today", when the background was the New Culture Movement, which opened up a new path for the growth of children by eliminating old traditions. A hundred years later, we will discuss this topic again, and we will have rich associations.
In the Beijing subway, children are beaten in public and children are kneeling! The behavior of this parent, first, is a very typical violation of the basic educational norms, publicly let the child kneel down and admit mistakes, will hurt the child's self-esteem, make the child have an inferior personality, and may also cause the child's social anxiety and social avoidance behavior. The child's fault is first and foremost the parent's fault! Every mistake a child makes is an educational loophole that parents have ever had. The second is a very typical violation of national law. Article 5 of the Family Education Promotion Law, which came into effect on 1 January 2022, mentions that family education should respect the personal dignity of minors and protect the legitimate rights and interests of minors. In the face of an 8-year-old child, taking a rough approach not only causes psychological trauma to the child, but also causes psychological discomfort to the people around him, which is an unreasonable and irresponsible performance.
In order to avoid the recurrence of news incidents such as simple and rough education of children, parents should strive to become qualified parents. On the one hand, parents should carry out family education and learning, and there should be no more incidents similar to harming children. On the other hand, the majority of parents urgently need to make up for legal courses such as the Family Education Promotion Law.