In our country, there has always been the traditional idea of preferring sons to daughters, although some young people have gradually abandoned these feudal dross, but in the minds of many older generations, having a son has become their biggest obsession.
Previously, there was a family in rural Jiangxi, and the couple gave birth to 11 girls in a row, which was a very unworthy thing in the local area.
In order to chase after the boys, they disregarded the poverty of their families and had many children, but still decided to make a desperate bet and let it go.
Fortunately, this time, the wish was finally granted, and the couple got a big fat son.
You can imagine the boy's position in the family, his parents and 11 sisters are around him, although the family conditions are not good, but the boy has an emperor-like life.
Soon the boy reached the age of talking about marriage, and in order to let the only younger brother in the family be able to marry in a beautiful way, the old couple could be said to have broken their hearts at home.
They wanted to help their son buy a house, but they had no spare money in their hands, so they only had to look at 11 daughters, and the answer they got was of course no problem.
With the help of 11 older sisters, the younger brother finally had 320,000 yuan to buy a house and marry a relative.
At the brother's wedding, the family was dressed in big red clothes, neat and powerful, everyone had a smile on their faces, and this younger brother who had been in pain since childhood had finally grown up.
But behind these smiles, is everything really all right?
It is understood that many of the 11 girls dropped out of school early due to family financial difficulties, and even the only sister who was admitted to college was given up because her parents could not afford the high tuition fees.
So these sisters did not go out of the countryside and married men from their own villages or neighboring villages.
Without academic qualifications, they can only do some low-income work, and now they have to pay about 30,000 yuan for each family of their brothers, which is tantamount to worse.
But they would rather save money than choose to refuse.
I have to say that in addition to loving their son, the couple actually feels guilty about their 11 daughters.
What are the effects of patriarchal families on children?
1, let the girl inferiority and sensitivity
Children want to be loved by their parents, and when parents are unable to meet their children's needs, children are bound to feel lost.
If parents cannot feel the emotional changes in their children's hearts in time, then over time the children will inevitably become inferior.
Even feeling that you are superfluous in the family is obviously not conducive to the growth of the child and will become an eternal shadow in the child's heart.
2) Let the boy be selfish
When parents focus all their love on a child, the child inevitably becomes arrogant, they feel that they are the center of the family, and everyone has to revolve around them.
Such children will be difficult to integrate into the group when they grow up, and selfish people will only consider themselves and shirk their responsibilities when they encounter things, but it is conceivable that the doting of parents is actually pushing the children step by step into the abyss.
What exactly should parents do in families with many children?
1. Refuse to favor sons over daughters
Many families with many children are formed to posthumously give birth to boys, of course, it is not excluded that some families want their children to have both, so they will have a second child and a third child.
But no matter what, if there are boys and girls in the family, then parents must avoid the phenomenon of son preference, otherwise it will be detrimental to the growth of children.
2. Treat children fairly
In many multi-child families, parents will be more partial to younger children, especially when two or three children play together, no matter who makes the mistake, most of the last people to carry the pot are the boss.
This is obviously the wrong way of education, if it is not their mistake, why should they bear the mistakes of others?
Even if the person is his own brother or sister.
Since parents have children, they should be responsible for their children and do their best to give them the best of everything. Every child is a gift from God to their parents, don't let your child be sad, because they only grow up once.