During this time, Gao Yuanyuan's new drama "Perfect Partner" is being broadcast, I don't know if the sisters are chasing, which is her return to the screen after nine years. Sven's personal expectations are still quite high, and my sister finally killed back.
A few days ago, I brushed her on Weibo to watch a video of several vegetarian couples "Confession Bureau", to be honest, it is quite heartfelt, and sure enough, every family has a difficult scripture.
In the video, Zhao Xu asks Zheng Yan what he hates most, and Zheng Yan says that she hates that he does not implement all his plans for Emma (the child). From this sentence, it is enough to glimpse the educational environment of this "tiger mother and cat father", the mother wants to let the child learn more, and the father is always passively executing, and unconsciously the two have a contradiction.
Feng Kuan asked his wife Li Qi, "What is the most hurtful thing I said to you", Li Qi reacted for a while, saying that it was probably when he was full-time, Feng Kuan said without heart: "You are always at home, you don't know how this thing should be." ”
Thinking from another position, this sentence for Li Qi at that time inevitably had a feeling of disconnection with society, although Feng Kuan's late heartfelt "sorry" was sincere enough, but it was difficult to feel how sad Li Qi should have been at that time.
Even the old husband and wife who have fought for many years in the trivialities of life still have different degrees of unspeakable confusion in the face of these soul tortures that strike the heart directly in reality; even if they usually look at each other and get along harmoniously, it is inevitable that there will be cracks in the accumulation of time, perhaps a casual sentence, or it may be a trivial matter.
However, we continue to explore the essence of married life, not two people who love each other, work together to resolve their resentment and misunderstandings with each other, and face the long process of facing the many tests from life.
As independent individuals, we achieve growth and progress in examining ourselves, and at the same time, we and our partners brew happiness more mellow.
Just as Gao Yuanyuan recently showed these two very representative families in this new drama "Perfect Partner", Sven watched a few episodes, and this drama is afraid that it is not a monitor installed around us, and sure enough, art comes from life.
Before talking about the play, we may wish to think about a question: What is the original intention of our decision to start a family with each other and enter the married life?
Is it simply to give love a happy end, or do you want to spend the beginning of this life with him/her.
In the play, Chen Shan (played by Gao Yuanyuan), Sun Lei (played by Zhang Luyi), Lin Qingkun (played by Wang Yaoqing) and Wu Min (played by Wang Zhen'er) have each experienced love, marriage, and children, and have had so many beautiful pasts.
Helpless middle-aged people's chai rice oil and salt after all, not as calm as when they were young, only talking about the wind and snow moon, it is real, cruel, and occasionally there are wild storms, but they have to face it.
Let's talk about Chen Shan and Sun Lei first, one is the female elite of the law firm who is responsible for making money and supporting the family, and the other is that the good man ceiling is responsible for more trivial matters at home, and the division of labor between the husband and wife is quite clear. Life is full, there is no shortage of anything.
As a result, I did not expect that there was a marriage crisis when the two came up, and Sun Lei and Chen Shan, who have always been honest about the family, said: "We are not going to reconsider this marriage." ”
Sven felt that if Sun Lei could say this sentence, it must not be that he had just moved this thought, but only an emotional outburst before he said it.
We see that the family model of "strong women and weak men" on the surface is not the root cause of the gradual breakdown of the marriage of the two people, but the deviation of the pursuit of their respective self-realization, and the repeated friction in married life is inevitable to escalate the conflict.
Chen Shan is a standard workaholic, she is fierce and decisive, daring to speak bluntly at the conference to force the boss, publicly questioning when the boss will be eligible to become a senior partner of the law firm.
Not only is the leader righteous and courageous, but also dares to teach Party A to be a person, worthy of being a sister, Sven saw the whole time to be refreshed.
She can fight for her work until she has a car accident and has no time to deal with it, and her nose is full of blood and she still insists on handing over the plan. It is also this scene that makes her husband Sun Lei's face full of question marks, and he really can't figure out what work is more important than his own life.
Chen Shan said last second that she was going to climb Mount Tai with Sun Lei when she stopped working, Sun Lei took good annual leave here, and the next second her sister couldn't do without work.
High-intensity work coupled with strenuous exercise led to shock into the hospital for rescue, which could not make her stop, Sun Lei's front foot just came home and her back foot was secretly discharged.
Probably Sun Lei has long been accustomed to her like this, but it is really difficult not to be angry.
However, Sun Lei's situation is completely different from Chen Shan's, with a gentle personality, not impatient, has his own fixed job but will always focus on family, saying that he will take leave when he asks for leave. The family is well taken care of, and the growth of the daughter has never been absent.
He will tie his daughter's pigtails, pick her up and drop her daughter off at school, and get angry that Chen Shan has missed her child, but this is the case.
It is not that Sun Lei will not make money to support his family, but that he has chosen to take on more family responsibilities, which will inevitably come at the expense of his career progress.
Sun Lei pursues a life of small wealth and peace, and Chen Shan does not think so.
From the first quarrel between the two people over the car accident, it can be seen that what they each wants in their married life is not the same.
Sun Lei asked Chen Shan what he was working so hard every day for, and Chen Shan replied without hesitation: "Realize your personal value, in order to make your life better, then this house, car, jumping tuition fees are so expensive every year, these are not blown by the wind." ”
But Sun Lei told Chen Shan that he and Jump didn't need that much at all. Material enjoyment is not necessary for him and the child, Chen Shan is a must.
Chen Shan is working very hard to weigh her family and career, sun Lei is not ignorant of Chen Shan, he understands all of Chen Shan's temper and disposition, and knows that she wants to realize her personal value in her career. In the face of the attitude of the small sugar pill incident, we can also see that Chen Shan and Sun Lei's three views are very consistent.
As for why there is a marital crisis, Sven feels that their contradictions come from within the family. When Chen Shan's pursuit is getting higher and higher, the distance between her and Sun Lei is also getting farther and farther away in the process of pulling again and again, and Sun Lei's love and understanding for his wife cannot be abused, and after a long time, no one will be resentful.
Everyone walked into their own narrow alley and couldn't find the direction, their love was still there, but they didn't know how to save it.
In Sven's view, many of us are Chen Shan, often oscillating between how to weigh family and career, and entangled in the contradiction between how to realize self-worth and assume family responsibilities.
Let's look at Lin Qingkun and Wu Min, a typical "widowed parenting" family, Lin Qingkun's success in his career is ultimately difficult to replace his absence from the family and the companionship of his wife and children.
The child is lying in the hospital because of food poisoning, Wu Min frantically voiced and called and could not find Lin Qingkun, Wu Min's current loneliness and helplessness were too desperate to see Sven. This is certainly not the first time, nor will it be the last.
When the wife needs her husband the most and the children need the father the most, Lin Qingkun is always not around.
Wu Min, who looks weak in appearance, risks being countersued, and also wants to stand up and report the small sugar pill company to prevent them from going public, not because she has a big vendetta with this company, but because she can't accept Lin Qingkun's permission to speak up to her children in order to save customers.
In order to get Wu Min's signature, Lin Qingkun pretended to be a good husband and father, and Wu Min said that he wanted to suspend his work and accompany them at home, but in the end Wu Min found out that it was a scam.
Obviously, he said that he would accompany the child to barbecue for the weekend, but he just bought a barbecue stove. Good Lin Qingkun, indeed a cruel person who does not fold his means for work, this "face" is estimated that only Wang Yaoqing can perform hhh. (I swear there really isn't a pejorative meaning.)
Lin Qingkun is a businessman, and he will use the thinking of a businessman to consider his family.
In his subconscious, he only managed to make money outside to give his wife and children a superior material foundation, while Wu Min was in charge of taking care of the family. (Listen, he's proud.)
Everyone has a clear division of labor and does not interfere with each other, Lin Qingkun is very rational and smart, but he ignores that the family is maintained by feelings, not money. His repeated deceptions can only make the already disharmonious family relationship worse, making Wu Min's mind more sensitive and fragile.
Lin Qingkun didn't know what Wu Min really wanted, and he knew how he couldn't be satisfied with giving them such a good life; and Wu Min didn't understand that Lin Qingkun was out all day ignoring his home, and he couldn't care about his son's safety for the sake of customers.
They have ineffective communication or no communication at all, so that the two people who were originally in love gradually drifted apart. The two people were not wrong, but slowly it was not appropriate, Wu Min did not want much, but Lin Qingkun could go home several times, but Lin Qingkun still could not give.
Two families have two completely different ways of division of labor, they use love as the center to plan the direction of marriage, whether it is the workplace or the choice of family, there will always be one party who will choose tolerance and compromise in marriage.
When the love and beauty of the love period are gradually engulfed by the chickens and dogs of the married life, there is always someone to sacrifice and give up. Sun Lei could have realized self-worth in his career, but he chose to take more care of his family, first taking the initiative to give up the opportunity to study abroad, sending his daughter to school and being caught by his boss and had to be transferred to other positions.
Sun Lei is not out of the ordinary, he is for the family to become better, he is patient, concessional, but also respect.
Wu Min originally lived not only children and husbands, before becoming a wife and becoming a mother, she was first of all herself. She was willing to be a stay-at-home mom, but that shouldn't be all she had.
In other words, it was Sun Lei and Wu Min who took care of their chores in the rear, and Chen Shan and Lin Qingkun could be successful in the workplace. Everything may seem perfect, but those compromises made out of love will also become part of the reef along with the marriage itself.
In the face of these reefs, the response of the crowd is also very different. Chen Shan Sun Lei chose to trust and understand again and again in the quarrel, but the emotions were also secretly accumulated; Lin Qingkun wu min every time he tried his best to tit-for-tat, but he was powerless to change the broken reality.
Sven from the previous official trailer to see, the two families to the back seem to have pulled the divorce certificate, whining is not official, how can it be?
Middle-aged people are often in the most difficult situation, they are old and young, and the emotional bond between them is not only each other but also family. Maybe you really lost it to better examine yourself and understand each other, and then see how these four find an exit after experiencing the wind and waves, face the difficult situation, and can't help but look forward to it.
I say that this play has a certain practical significance, which allows us to better examine marriage, not that all families will go to divorce (crossed out). This drama provides a window of observation for our long married life, peacefully and warmly showing the marriage situation, allowing us to see the true story of marriage after the romantic fairy tale HE.
In marriage, it is difficult to reach perfection with perfect love, and perhaps the existence of the reef is the norm of life.
In fact, there is no so-called perfect partner in this world, but we can approach perfection infinitely for the sake of the person we love. In the face of disputes, you can bow your head and compromise, and have more understanding and tolerance in the years, just like Gao Yuanyuan said, a good partner is actually a good psychologist.
They will accept all our negative emotions without complaint, and when the years pass and the passion fades, they still have the courage to face the world hand in hand.
From the perfect filter of love to real life, from the characters in the play to observe and reflect on ourselves, how can we balance self-worth and family responsibilities, and find the best of both worlds in the turbulent water? Let's go to "The Perfect Partner" with Sven to find out.
The most common questions are the most difficult to solve, and the answer to life is more than unique.