There is a saying:
"Gentleness can be disguised, romance can be made, beauty can be modified, and only heartache is the most primitive love."
When you think about it, it is.
If a person's love is only expressed in words, staying on the surface, but never entering the heart, then such love, like a crystal toy in the window, is so beautiful, but it can't stand a little knocking.
Only when he cherishes you from his heart does he prove that he truly regards you as a very important person in life.
Only such feelings can resist the long blandness and never leave.
People who hurt you, understand your difficulties
In life, people will be accustomed to seeing their own difficulties, but they will not care at all about how difficult others are.
If he doesn't care about you, then even if you shoot through your heart and you don't want to die, it's just your business.
On the contrary, when a person can see that you are not easy and can appreciate your efforts to him, then it means that you have occupied a certain place in his heart.
It is precisely because of care that there will be empathy and understanding.
I once watched a video like this:
At a liquor store, everyone makes small talk.
When it comes to the fact that the wife is a full-time wife, some people are full of complaints: "She doesn't know anything but nagging"; some people are full of disgust: "I am tired and tired every day, but she can't help me at all"...
At this time, a young man said:
"Even though she doesn't have a job, I know she's paid no less than I did, and I'm grateful for the sacrifices she's made for the family over the years."
Perhaps, this is the difference between loving or not loving.
Duras says:
"If a person loves you, his heart will be cherished, and if he does not love, he will only have himself."
A person who loves you deeply can always find your shining point and will always see your difficulty, even if you really pay much less than him.
For in the hearts of those who love you deeply, it is more difficult for you to suffer than for himself to suffer.
People who hurt you are not willing to make you sad
Bloom says:
"I used to love the wrong person and thought that my feelings were very tired, but now I understand that the people who really hurt you and care about you will not let you suffer." 」
Two people together for a long time, there will inevitably be contradictions, there are differences.
A person who really hurts you will willingly tolerate you and will think of coaxing you when you are sad.
Because he'd rather see your smiling face than win or lose.
In the TV series "Perfect Partner", Chen Shan works at a well-known law firm and is a typical workaholic, and her husband Sun Lei works in a state-owned enterprise.
Once, For the sake of her own work, Chen Shan even ignored her injured daughter, which made Sun Lei very angry, so her attitude towards Chen Shan was also cold.
However, less than a day after the Cold War, Sun Lei could not go on cold, and seeing that Chen Shan was still working late at night, he got up and made a bowl of egg noodles for her.
Although it was just a simple bowl of noodles, it showed Sun Lei's concern and heartache for Chen Shan. It is precisely because I really care that I can take the initiative to compromise and show goodwill.
"East Evil West Poison" says:
"If the relationship can be divided into winners, I don't know if she will win, but I know very well that from the beginning I lost."
Good feelings require compromise and concessions.
A person who can tolerate you and take care of you when he is angry, and who will take the lead in bowing his head, is not because he has a good temper, but because he does not want to make you sad.
As the saying goes:
"Encouragement is not an external form, but a concern for you born from the heart."
People who hurt you will put themselves in your shoes
The French writer Romain Rolland said:
"When you truly love someone, you will forget your own bittersweet gains and losses, and only care about the other party's bittersweet gains and losses." 」
Human nature is self-interested and selfish, and no one will wronged himself and become a less important person.
When a person can put himself in your shoes, think for you, even if he suffers, then it is really difficult to have any other reason than deep love.
A few years ago, the girlfriend of my friend Dacheng had a change in her home and was in urgent need of a large amount of money.
At that time, Dacheng was busy preparing to study abroad.
For Dacheng, this opportunity was enough to change his fate.
But for his girlfriend, he eventually gave up, not only taking all the money out to his girlfriend, but also running forward and backward for his girlfriend's family.
After that, I asked him, "Do you regret it?" ”
And he just said three words firmly: "No regrets." ”
Perhaps when they see this, many people will feel sorry for Dacheng, and even for Dacheng is not worth it, but isn't love like this?
As Zhang Ailing wrote in "Half Life":
"You ask me if loving you is worth it, but you should know that love is not worth it."
The person who really hurts you will do their best to protect you from harm.
As long as it is good for you, they will do whatever it takes; as long as you can live happily, then all the grievances they can swallow.
Hugo says:
"The greatest blessing in life is to be sure that someone loves you."
The greatest happiness in life is never because of youth and excitement, but because of being loved and shining.
The rest of your life is long, may you also be able to meet such a person, he understands your difficulty, is not willing to let you be sad, put yourself in the shoes of you to consider.
If you are lucky enough to meet it, you must know how to cherish it.
END
Author: Away from the rain slightly cool, a rational, emotional, like to use words to express personal views, bring you spiritual healing, emotional solution, life perception of the post-90s writer.