Wen | snow fell without dust
In the hit drama "Xiao MinJia", the love between Xu Zheng and Liu Xiaojie makes people feel suffocated.
Liu Xiaojie and classmates after the group photo, was put on the shoulder by the male girlfriend, Xu Zheng, who saw this scene in the car, immediately looked abominable, disregarding Xiao Jie's face, directly insulting her male girlfriend.
Got into an argument with Xiao Jie on the road, kicked the accelerator, and rear-ended her boyfriend's car to vent his anger.
Back at home, he changed his face, apologized in a low voice, and said to Liu Xiaojie: "All I did was because I loved you." ”
Then, very casually opened Liu Xiaojie's mobile phone password, sweetly coaxed, and directly deleted her male girlfriend for more than ten years.
Lu Yao said in "Ordinary World": "True love is not egoistic, but should be altruistic." ”
When the person you love starts to control you with his mood, he is only pleasing himself, not caring about you.
In the relationship between the sexes, love is right is peace of mind, and love wrong is heartache.
The hit drama "Little Minjia" tells us: Whether there is love for people, "feeling" will not lie.
01
Gentle and not extreme
In the play, Liu Xiaojie asked Xu Zheng in the car, why did he go to the car where the male girlfriend was sitting? Explained that it used to stand like this when the students would take pictures, and there was no problem.
And Xu Zheng's expression was cold and serious, he was angry, slapping the steering wheel and roaring angrily at Xiao Jie:
"I don't care what you were before, you're my fiancée now, and we're going to get a license soon." You're so close to other men, are you worthy of me? Liu Xiaojie! ”
If you don't look at the previous plot, Xu Zheng's reaction will think that the heroine has split her legs. But in fact, it is just Xu Zheng's extremism, amplifying Liu Xiaojie's contact with the opposite sex, and then starting to become fierce, gentle no longer.
And the man who really loves you will not kill you, and speak softly, which will make you feel very comfortable.
Li Li's boyfriend is like this, after being with Li Li, he cares a lot about her feelings; whether it is shopping, eating, or friends together, he is gentle and gentle with Li Li.
When the two of them went out to dinner, he would ask Li Li's opinion first. When Li Li said that he didn't know what to eat, he would list the foods that Li Li usually liked to eat and give Li Li a choice.
Li Li said to eat whatever he wanted, even if it was far away, to queue for a long time, he would also bend his eyebrows, take Li Li's hand and say: "Okay, let's go eat this." ”
Sometimes Li Li willful, tantrum, will also do wrong things, say the wrong thing, he will not yell at her, murder her; but the first time to pay attention to Li Li's emotions, and then look at her tenderly, comfort and companionship.
There is a comment under Miyazaki's work "Porco Rosso": "Talking to people you like will become very gentle." ”
The man who loves you, his eyes full of you, will only hurt you; only the man who does not love you will kill you at every turn.
In love, women will be more insecure than men. And a person who loves you is your fortress, your haven, and your little cotton jacket, soft is warm to you, and the walls are protective of you.
This kind of gentleness makes you feel at ease all the time.
02
Respect, no control
In the play, the leader gave Liu Xiaojie the opportunity to be promoted, and Liu Xiaojie was pleasantly surprised to talk to Xu Zheng, and Xu Zheng's reaction was whether he would contact male customers.
When Xiao Jie and Xu Zheng said that they attached great importance to this job opportunity, Xu Zheng said:
"Work is more important than me? Tell you to stay away from male clients long ago! Why would someone as good as me choose a divorced woman? It's because I love you! I and it you choose one! ”
Xu zheng is pua Liu Xiaojie step by step, mentally controlling her, and then interfering with the work of another her.
If two people want to be long-lasting, respect for the other half is necessary. Not just work, even if it is a choice, you can see if this person is your true destiny.
In the variety show "The Man Who Does Housework", Yuan Hong tells us what is respect and what is pampering with actions.
His wife, Zhang Xinyi, is an actress who weighs 65 kilograms after giving birth to a child, and the back of the child is rounded with puffiness. But if Zhang Xinyi wants to make a comeback, she must lose weight.
Yuan Hong listened to his wife's thoughts, and did not use sarcasm, nor did he cheer on the side, but respected his wife's ideas and used a bet to accompany his wife to lose weight.
In the end, Zhang Xinyi lost 20 pounds in half a month. This result, many netizens have seen love. Yuan Hong's figure originally did not need to lose weight, and the reason why he set the goal of practicing abs was purely to stick with his wife.
Zhang Ailing said in "Love in the Fallen City": "I don't understand myself. But I want you to understand me! I want you to understand me! ”
In real life, you will find that a person who loves you is definitely a person who understands you. Whether it is a choice of work, or a tacit understanding in life, as long as it is what you want, without too many words, the person who loves you will definitely understand.
People who don't know respect and just want to control you, instead of loving you, just don't want to take the time to pay attention to what you think. Such a partner, after being together, will inevitably become an endless abyss.
Love is respect, it is solid in the heart; it is not control that makes you feel bad in your heart.
03
Companionship, no possession
In the latest trailer, Xu Zheng took Liu Xiaojie's mobile phone away and locked her at home to prevent her from going out.
After going back, Xu Zheng complained that Xiao Jie had carried the male girlfriend for 5 minutes. Contacting the opposite sex for 5 minutes made the man start to go crazy.
He threatened Liu Xiaojie with a fruit knife on the table, and Liu Xiaojie desperately tried to break free, but Xu Zheng stabbed the knife into his thigh to ask for forgiveness.
Xu Zheng roared loudly and said, "Everything I do is because I love you too much." The coerced Xiao Jie trembled in a trembling voice and forgave Xu Zheng. Xu Zheng smiled, but Xiao Jie cried.
García Márquez in Love in the Time of Cholera says, "What does true love need?" Needing two people together is easy and happy, no stress. ”
And this kind of oppressive love, when you look at it, you feel cold on your back, not to mention being in it, not crazy and only left to be afraid, contrary to the essence of love.
Love is not all about life, everyone will have their own circle of life, circle of communication, relatives and friends. If choosing a partner means giving up everything about yourself, the relationship will collapse sooner or later.
A healthy relationship between the sexes must be trusting, inclusive, and understanding; possession is not self-confidence, but also short-lived, if you want to get along for a long time, it is indispensable to accompany each other.
Time verifies the human heart, but also the character of this person. What suits you will not go, and what is not suitable for you will not fit.
Zhou Guoping said in "The Capacity of Love": "Good love has resilience, can be pulled open, but it is constantly pulled. The fact that lovers do not bind each other is a manifestation of their confidence in love. No one restricts anyone, and in the end it is still no one who can do without whom, which is true love. ”
As mentioned above, a man who seems to love you so much for you is actually hurting you and persuading you to dump him as soon as possible.
Love is right, you will feel tenderness, experience respect, always be accompanied; love is wrong, you will experience a person's extremism, the spirit is controlled, freedom is controlled, all the time in uneasiness and panic, only endless heartache is left.
Love right, peace of mind. Love is wrong, heartache. I only hope that for the rest of your life you can meet good people, always at ease, and be happy at all times!