Where the bottom line of parents is, where is the height of the child's future!

For children, the formation of the three views and personality is only a few years, and parents must seize the precious opportunity to block the direction of evil and let him grow happily toward the sun.

Where the bottom line of parents is, the height of the child's future is where it is.

01

The other day, I saw a news that made people speechless.

A teacher in Liangqing District, Nanning City, was in class when a student suddenly sat on the ground because of a chair.

So the teacher walked over from the podium and took the student's arm and tried to get him back into his seat.

However, an incredible scene occurred, the student picked up the umbrella on the ground and hit the teacher's head, and the head and ears were bleeding on the spot.

What is even more surprising is that in the follow-up process, the child's father said that the reason the teacher was beaten was too close to the child.

It means that the consequences of the teacher's beating must be conceited, and the reason is strange that it can be against the sky.

Now some parents have broken their hearts for their children, and no matter what mistakes he has made, they firmly believe that they are right, and they have a reason to do it.

In Shanghai, a child in the kindergarten hegemonic grab toy bite 5 children a day, the child's father not only did not apologize, but also let the parents of the bitten child reflect: "Why my child bites, please think twice." ”

A 22-year-old girl in Jiangyin was hit in the head by a brick thrown from the roof by a bear child and died instantly. The parents of the bear child opened their mouths and said that it was because the property did not clean up the garbage in time.

Behind almost every crazy child stands a parent with no bottom line.

02

Love without a bottom line is actually a scourge. Li Tianyi is such an example.

Father Li Shuangjiang was never willing to punish him, even if Li Tianyi made a mistake, he really wanted to fight, but before he could fight, his tears fell, and he couldn't get his hands on it at all.

The mother Dream Pigeon is even more spoiled by Li Tianyi.

At the age of 13, Li Tianyi went to the United States to study, fell in love with ice hockey, and Dream Pigeon indulged him to play in the garage of the community, which led to conflict.

When he was 14 years old, Li Tianyi wanted to drive, and Mengge gave him a BMW despite the fact that his child was underage and did not have a driver's license. Soon, Li Tianyi beat up a couple over a traffic dispute.

Although these were all balanced by Mengge, it also made Li Tianyi think that his parents could handle everything, so he became even more crazy, not only doing whatever he wanted, but even indifferent to the law, and finally became the initiator of the gang rape case, and was sentenced to ten years in prison.

Echoing Rousseau's words, "Do you know what method you can use to make your child an unfortunate person?" That is to be obedient to him. ”

It is reported that later dream pigeons often washed their faces with tears. But if you know today, why did you know it in the first place?

Parents have no bottom line, does not mean that society has no bottom line; parents do not teach their children, sooner or later society will teach him fiercely, do not wait until then to regret it.

The most unforgivable person in the world is the child, and the most unkind is the parent.

Because the child is still young, he still can't distinguish between good and evil, beauty and ugliness, right and wrong, so he needs parents to keep the bottom line, tell him where the boundaries of behavior are, and tell him what public order and good customs are.

Because the child is still young, he cannot control himself, so he needs parents to keep the bottom line, use discipline or punishment methods, suppress the evil part of other people's human nature, and prevent him from going further and further down the wrong path.

03

Over the years, freedom and the release of children's nature have become the golden rule of education for many parents, as if as long as they are scolded and disciplined, they will leave a psychological shadow on their children.

In fact, to let parents have a bottom line, it is not to abuse violence, but to use appropriate discipline to let children understand things and understand right and wrong.

When he looks back later, he will also understand that those punishments are only the price of making mistakes.

I know that the author Yang Yuyou once shared the growth story of a friend.

This friend was also a bear child when he was young, and once took a train, noisy along the way, no matter how his mother was educated, he did not think so.

As a result, his mother took him straight out of the car and said to him, "I respect your desire to speak, but I also respect the right of other people in the car not to be disturbed." Now you can say whatever you want, and you won't bother others, and when you're done, we'll buy a ticket and leave! ”

That day, they stayed at that station for seven hours, and he cried and rolled, but his mother was unmoved and said, "This is your own mistake, and you have to bear it yourself." If you cry again, we will continue to stay here and wait for you to finish crying, if you are tired of crying, I have food here. I will not promise you anything because you threaten me with crying, not now, and even more not later. ”

It wasn't until he assured his mother that they would never make any noise or disturb anyone again that they bought tickets again and left.

Since then, friends have never been noisy in public. There are many such things in the process of growing up friends.

For example, naughty, repeatedly go to the neighbor's doorbell. After apologizing to the neighbor, Mom knocked on his door repeatedly while he was doing his homework until he realized how irritable it was to be teased.

For example, he beat the girls in the same class, and his mother beat him for the first time, and then told him that boys are stronger than girls, not to bully girls, but to protect girls.

Now, this friend has grown into a sunny and cheerful and very cultured person.

In fact, every child has a good side and an evil side when they are young, and the difference is how their parents do it.

If tolerated, the child may be humanly evil. Only discipline can produce better flowers.

04

"Unequal Childhood" writes: At least to a certain extent, the American elite generally practice cooperative education, which can be roughly understood as "captivity", while the working class and the poor practice of child-rearing is the natural growth, that is, we call "free-range".

You see, stocking is just a helpless choice of the American working class and the poor, while the American elite will set clear boundaries in the education of their children.

The end result is that the children of the poor class grow up to compete with the children of the elite, forming a clear class solidification.

There is an ancient Chinese saying that parents love their children, and their plans are far-reaching.

If, you still have time to discipline your child, if you don't want your child to become a crazy, troublemaker, or even a criminal in the future.

Of course, discipline is also skillful:

1. Seize the moment

When he makes mistakes, deal with them resolutely and never compromise, let him know that no one in this world can do whatever he wants, and there is a price for making mistakes.

2. Lead by example

Parents are the child's role models, parents who require children can not do must not do, only if you bend down to demonstrate, children can follow.

3. Grasp the pain point

For some children, violence may not be useful, but if you can grasp the pain point, you can definitely achieve good results.

For example, tell him that because you made a mistake, you promised that your trip to Sanya would be canceled, and when to go again, see how you perform.

Another example is telling your child that if you don't make mistakes, your dad will promise you to accompany you to the latest movie.

Improve your child's likelihood of self-discipline through rewards and penalties.

For children, the formation of the three views and personality is only a few years, and parents must seize the precious opportunity to block the direction of evil and let him grow happily toward the sun. Where the bottom line of parents is, the height of the child's future is where it is.

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