Parents should say "no" to their children and occasionally hide their pity

"God created Mom because he couldn't take care of it."

This is a sentence that appears in the Talmud (a compilation of jewish oral laws, second only to the scriptures of the Bible). In this world, only parents can jump without hesitation even in the face of hell for their children. Because of the existence of parents, children can grow up healthily after more than 20 years of long growth process. From the beginning of Australopithecus to the present, humans have continued for more than 3 million years, is it not because of the careful care of parents?

An autistic child, under the harsh rebuke and love of his mother, overcame his own obstacles, challenged the limits of human beings, and completed the marathon process, which is the story told in the movie "Marathon".

Hatsuhara loved zebras and chocolate pie. On the surface, he looked no different from other children, but one day, he was diagnosed with autism. He didn't know his illness yet, and he had an innocent smile all day. Mom looked at such a primordial and almost collapsed. She took her autistic son to the zoo, where she let go of his son's hand and tried to abandon him, but it was only a momentary thought, but it made her miserable. She soon woke up and found her crying son in front of the zebra cage. At this time, she made up her mind that she must allow her son to communicate with the world. She found that her son was talented in long-distance running, so she conducted "devil training" for her son, and at the same time, she also began a bitter "coaching" process. The kid who used to run just for the chocolate pie, from now on, in order to make the only mom in the world happy, he started a marathon run.

Time flies, Hatsuhara is in his 20s, but he will fart in front of anyone, and whenever there is music, he will dance everywhere. In this way, he is good at one thing, that is, running. One day, the famous marathon runner Masasushi came to Hatsuhara's school to offer love, and Hatsuhara's mother begged him to accept her son as a student. A marathon that normal people can't complete, but my mother let Hatsuhara complete it. Masaharu said coldly to Hatsuhara's mother, "Do you know how tired it is to run a marathon?" Have you ever run? You have to distinguish between stubbornness and love, and you can't impose your will on your child. ”

Enabling her son to communicate with the world is her only wish. To her, Zhengxu's words stabbed her heart like a sharp dagger, and all the efforts she made for her son were selfish? Thinking of this, she blamed herself deeply and fell into despair again, just like she had been in a zoo twenty years ago.

But she didn't give up, she knew that the only person who could make Hatsuhara communicate with this world was her. She stood up from despair. When asked her", "What is your wish?", she replied, "I hope Hatsuhara can die a day earlier than me!" "What mother in the world wants her child to die sooner than herself?" In fact, this thought stemmed from her fear of leaving her child alone in the world.

In the end, Hatsuhara completed the training under the harsh training and hard care of his mother. By running marathons, through his own strength, he found a way to communicate with the world. After a long 42.195-kilometer run, he shouted to the world: "My heart is beating!" ”

Someone once said that a woman starts a second life from the moment she gives birth to a child. This is how the child can influence the life of the parents, and his existence and growth are crucial to the parents. Parents have been busy all day, and when they see their children's sunny smiles, all the pain will disappear in an instant. Children bring us endless joy and happiness. Sometimes we even wonder: How is life without children like?

For the sake of the child, as long as it is what they can do, parents will spare no effort to do it, because the happiness of the child is their own happiness. However, no one can guarantee that parents will give everything for their children and their children will be happy. Now all the love you give to your child is valid, and one day the child will leave your arms. From then on, you can no longer do anything for your child, all you can do is take a step back, guard the child, and not hinder the child.

Parents occasionally want cruel reasons

The mother in the movie Marathon is the epitome of all parents who raise their children. "I hope that my child will die sooner than myself", behind this desire hides a deep love for children. The kind of mother who whips her child in order to make her child run a little more may not be acceptable to modern young parents, right?

Children bounce around and play, accidentally scratch their knees, and now parents will be distressed. They can't train their children harshly. If you want your child to become an adult and live well in a complicated world, don't always answer "yes" to your child's requirements. No matter how dangerous the world is, children must learn the ability to survive on their own. If you blindly meet the requirements of the child, the child can not learn moral rules, such a child will be able to stand in society in the future?

Many parents unconditionally meet their children's requirements, always arguing that this is a way for children to increase self-confidence, courage, and creativity. But this may only be the selfish intention of parents, after all, educating children in this way will be a little easier and more comfortable. It's a cowardly parental heart. Think about it, which one is more tired, competing with children or letting children do whatever they want?

Of course, children should grow up under the care of their parents, which is necessary, and this love is helpful for children's growth. But if parents unconditionally meet all the requirements of their children, is it good for their children? It's really necessary to think about it.

In the process of tree growth, it is necessary to prune branches for it, if it grows naturally, the tree will be overgrown. The shape; even if it grows, it will not be beautiful. People are also like this, in the child's growth period, parents correct education can make the child grow up healthily. People who prune branches for the first time will not be very skilled in using scissors and are afraid of causing harm to the tree. Hatsuhara's mother must have had this kind of mood too, right? She must also be confused: Is what she is doing really for the good of the child? Or does it make her relationship with her children worse? But she hid this ambivalence and became a more "cruel" mother. Even when someone said she "couldn't tell the difference between love and stubbornness," she insisted on letting her children run. It was because of this mother that Hatsuhara finally defeated the marathon.

Even when the mother watches her child get involved, she still thinks that her choice is for the good of the child, and it is this belief that makes her work tirelessly and finally has a satisfactory result.

The meaning of the phrase "no"

Strict parents are not meant to ignore all of their children's feelings and desires. Being able to understand the child's feelings, treat the child lovingly, and strictly correct the child's wrong behavior is the real gesture that strict parents should have. That is to say, parents should not be shaken by their children's tears, pleading and the eyes of those around them, and have the courage to say "no" to their children. When parents say "no" to their children, the children may blame the parents. But for the sake of their children, parents have to hide their painful hearts. In a sense, saying "no" to a child is a sign of loving the child more than saying "I love you" to them.

So, sometimes we have to be strict parents, say "no" to our children, and hide the pain of the heart.

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