Zhuang Di Xiaomeng / Seeing the essence through the story
An original emotion number that deserves your attention
Illustration/from the web
There are tens of millions of leftover men and women on the mainland, although they are equally old and unmarried, but they never pay attention to each other, and sometimes they even hate each other, which is very common in the Internet.
It is often said that same-sex repulsion and heterosexual attraction are the laws of nature, but this law has been broken by some people.
Men and women are no longer attracted to each other, but there is a phenomenon of opposition.
Some people say that today's young people are less and less reluctant to get married, and the civil affairs bureau data shows that the marriage rate in the mainland is indeed not high.
This result is not surprising, men and women are beginning to oppose each other, how can they form a family that loves each other?
The antagonism between men and women is an important factor in the marriage rate
Marriage is something that both men and women need to do together, but now there are some strange phenomena in society.
Women are afraid of marriage
Many women have the emotion of fear of marriage, when it comes to marriage, what they see in their eyes is not the vision of a better life, but the fear of married life.
They are afraid of cold violence, afraid of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law contradictions, afraid of widowed marriage.
What comes to their minds is not happiness, but unhappiness.
Men hate women
In this world, there is a kind of man who suffers from "feminophobia", who hates all women, as if they are born with some kind of hatred with women.
Such men are often active on the Internet, and you can often see them belittling, attacking, and denigrating women.
Men and women have such a state, how can the marriage rate go up?
The emergence of male and female antagonisms is not simple
In order to solve the problem of male and female antagonism, we must first find out the root causes of this phenomenon.
First, the network impact
The Internet has brought convenience to young people, but it has also brought some negative energy.
01 "Poisonous Chicken Soup" Guide
There are many poisonous chicken soups that cause confrontation between men and women on the Internet.
For example: "Forty-one flowers for men, forty tofu dregs for women." ”
"The older a man gets, the more valuable he gets."
"There are only men who can't marry wives, and there are no women who can't marry."
"Men are passively leftovers, women are actively leftovers."
There are many more such statements, and what they have in common is to praise one and belittle the other.
02 Comment area tearing each other apart sequelae
Under the poisonous chicken soup remarks, men and women inevitably tear each other apart, which is very common in the comment area.
They are all eager to stomp each other into the dirt, and in the midst of quarrelsome remarks, they will develop a greater sense of hatred for the opposite sex.
2. Negative news
People are sitting at home, news networks come up.
Some news is good, and some news is negative.
Whenever negative news about emotions or marriage comes up, there's a group of people shaking with their phones.
Those things don't have anything to do with them, but they will inexplicably bring themselves into the role.
But this can not blame them, negative news to see more, it is difficult for people to be full of hope for the world, this is an emotional rendering.
3. Caused by emotional injury
Some people have been very badly emotionally injured before, and they give wholeheartedly for a relationship, but in the end they lose everything.
They were scarred, even sore, and never dared to touch their feelings again.
Just as the so-called once bitten by a snake and afraid of the well rope for ten years, they not only have a jealous intention of feelings, but even have certain prejudices about the opposite sex.
They only meet one person, but they feel that this is true of all the opposite sex.
Resolve the antagonism between men and women, starting from the root causes
First, rectify the network
Young people can't do without the Internet, so the Internet will always affect them.
If all the propaganda on the Internet is positive energy, young people will be full of hope for the future, but if this is not the case, the result will naturally be the opposite.
(1) Control of the "poisonous chicken soup" that causes confrontation between men and women
Each platform should strengthen management and eliminate the existence of "poisonous chicken soup" that causes confrontation between men and women.
Whether it is a man or a woman, everyone is a human being first, and since they are all human beings, they should not be divided into high and low.
In the same way, those who are older and unmarried are not high or low, they are simply the same kind of people.
They are also old and unmarried, they also bear the same gaze of others, and they also endure the urging of their parents and relatives to marry, so they should be a group of people who feel sorry for each other.
(2) Comment monitoring, civilized speech
Some of the comment areas are a miasma of black smoke, netizens argue in it, and some even appear insults.
Everyone didn't know each other, and they didn't even know what kind of person they were facing, so they quarreled with themselves, which was simply the best thing to slip the world.
If the comments are strictly monitored, everyone must speak in a civilized manner, and if the violation is dealt with, it may play a certain deterrent role.
Second, rationally look at negative news
A person who has a negative view of the whole world because of negative news is just a temporary drill.
This emotion can be changed, such as watching more positive news.
The world is diverse, and if there are bad ones, there must be good ones, and if some people have miserable marriages, there must be people who are happy.
On this basis, people should not look at a thing in a one-sided way.
What's more, the lives of others do not necessarily become yours, because you are different people, you meet different people, and there is no need for everyone to bring other people's encounters into themselves.
Third, try to get out of the emotional wounds
I have been injured before, so I dare not touch my feelings, and even have fear of the opposite sex, and if I want to solve this problem, I have to come out of the previous emotional wounds.
(1) Start a new relationship
It is often said that the best way to heal the scars left by a relationship is to start a new relationship, which is not false at all.
After having a new relationship, you will gradually forget the previous injuries, and the sweetness of love will make you look at the world again.
(2) Look at more positive cases
Don't judge one thing with your own experience, you can look at the positive cases around you.
On your side, there must be lovers and couples who love each other.
When you see them, you should believe that you can meet the right person in the future.
The reason why you are hurt is not because the opposite sex is not good, it is just because the person you met is not good, come out of the past, meet the future with a hopeful mindset, and one day you will meet the right person.
Original author of the Zhuang Di Xiaomeng/Emotional Column
May your life be full of surprises, and may your happiness come as scheduled.