As the saying goes: "The girl is the mother's little cotton jacket, the boy is the mother's leather jacket".
Under normal circumstances, at home and the child is the closest is the mother, in a family, the father may be the economic pillar of the family, and the mother is more focused on the child, in our family, I am closer to the mother, what is willing to say to her, but also willing to get along with her, but not all children grow up to kiss the mother.
My mother's good friend Aunt Lin has two children, a son and a daughter, which can make my mother envious, when I was a child, she always envied Aunt Lin can have both children, Aunt Lin's daughter got married, the first eleven, Aunt Lin's son also married, daughter, son after marriage, have moved out to live, the family will be left Aunt Lin two old.
Aunt Lin complained to my mother a few days ago that their daughter and son have not returned for more than two months, and every time they call the two of them, they always use the excuse of busy work to shirk, and Aunt Lin, who is almost sixty years old, wants her son and daughter very much, and wants them to come back for a meal.
Aunt Lin's complaint caused me to think, when the child was the most dependent on the mother, and was very close to the mother, why did the child grow up but become estranged from the mother?
In fact, how the relationship between the child and the mother after growing up is inseparable from the child's growth environment, in general, the children who grow up and kiss the mother generally come from these three kinds of families.
1. Parents can affirm their child's family
My relationship with my parents is very good, I think the biggest advantage of my parents is to be able to affirm the children, my sister and I were young, as long as we did the right thing, my parents will affirm us, and sometimes give some small rewards, it is this affirmation and respect of my parents, so that my sister and I can boldly and confidently do some things, we also dare to challenge some things, they always give us encouragement.
Parents affirm their children and give their children encouragement, which can greatly enhance their feelings with their children, who would not like a person who praises themselves?
2. Families whose parents are not biased
Colleague Xiao Jing has two children in the family, Xiao Jing and brother, her parents are very serious over sons, when the two children were young, what is delicious and well dressed is to give to the younger brother first, last year Xiao Jing's brother got married, and her parents asked Xiao Jing to support her brother with ten thousand yuan of money (our side is very close to the people who give more money than 3,000), Xiao Jing also quarreled with her husband for this.
The eccentricity of the parents makes the relationship between Xiaojing and her parents not good, she rarely returns to her parents' home, usually her parents will not call her, the family where the parents are biased, there will definitely be a child who feels that the parents are unfair, and naturally the relationship with the parents will not be good.
3, a family with a good family atmosphere, parents are humorous and funny
There is another reason why my sister and my parents have a good relationship, that is, our family atmosphere is particularly good, from the beginning of my memory, my parents rarely quarrel, the two often ridicule each other, it looks particularly good, my parents are humorous and funny, we sometimes ridicule them, and my parents get along like friends, and when we encounter troubles, we will tell them, how can our relationship with our parents be bad in such a family atmosphere?
Some families quarrel and fight every three times, the mother cries at home, complains about the father all day, such a family child will be very tired in life, and naturally do not want to come back when they grow up.
Parents will think of reuniting with their children when they are older, the family is lively and lively, but the children refuse to come back, and the parents must be very uncomfortable.
How can you, as a parent, improve your relationship with your child?
1. Become your child's friend
As a parent, do not condescendingly accuse the child, as the child's friend and the child to communicate, let the child tell the parents of the heart, when the child does something wrong, do not rush to yell, understand the child's heart and communicate with the child, ask the child why he did the wrong thing, from the child's point of view, understand the child, so that it can be a good way to enhance the parent-child relationship.
2. Affirm the child and support the child
Everyone will like to affirm themselves and support themselves, and what parents have to do is to affirm that the child is doing the right thing, and what the child wants to do can support the child, rather than blindly hitting the child.
Parents and children get along is a science, parents must pay attention to the skills when getting along with their children, so that the mother will be kind and filial piety, and increase the relationship between parents and children.