This year's New Year's Visit relatives, relatives said that it will not be used in the future.
I looked at my relatives with a puzzled face, why don't I use them to walk with relatives in the future?
After listening to the relatives, their faces were red, and they didn't come up with a word for half a day, and they could only whisper on the side: This is not that the distance between our homes is too far, and it is not easy to walk away from the big and old.
I looked up dazed, far away? Is it really that far away?
My relatives and I live in a village, the relatives are in front of this alley, and my home is behind this alley.
From my house to my relative's house, it takes three minutes to walk past and 5 minutes to ride past, because cycling requires a small circle.
My relatives also saw that I was full of doubts, but he didn't bother to explain, telling me: Tell you not to use it, you don't use it, and you won't use it after that.
Just like this, how can you not understand it?
Bai is so old, I tell you that in the next New Year, if you want to come to our house to visit the New Year, I will be anxious with you.
I don't know if you have ever encountered visiting relatives and friends during the New Year's Festival, and when you go to a relative's house, the relatives take your hand and say how did you come? It will not be used anymore.
How should such an embarrassing thing be solved? How should I fix it?
Should you really listen to your relatives? After that, I won't go to my relatives' house? This is actually a kind of learning, far from being as simple as we think on the surface.
Point 1, my personal experience
The incident I just talked about is my personal experience, but this matter is not over.
Inexplicably, I got home and told my parents that the relative next door to us was so strange.
I had to tell me that this road was too far away, and I wouldn't have to go to his house in the future, but was this road that far away?
I only need to walk for three or five minutes if I can't walk, so why is it so far away?
I have not finished saying this sentence, my parents' faces have changed on the side, people do not let you go to other people's homes to worship the New Year, then do not go, even if you go to people's homes to worship the New Year, it will not be happy for others.
You still listen to my advice, honestly stay at home until the New Year, we don't go anywhere.
I was even more curious to hear my parents say this, because it was a very strange thing, wasn't it?
If a relative says this to you, your first impression or first feeling is what is a joke, and the road is so far.
Later, I found other elders in the family, did not try not to know, a question frightened, it turned out that just last year, there was a contradiction between our family and relatives.
And this contradiction is almost dead and unresponsive, both sides are torn skin, my parents and each other's parents do not know how many times they have scolded the street, and the whole village knows about this matter.
And because I was out of town at the time and couldn't get home in time, my parents didn't bother to let me worry more, so I didn't tell me about this matter at all.
In addition, when I was carrying these gifts to the New Year this year, I did not tell my parents whose house I would go to to visit.
After all, I was so old, and my parents knew that there were only a few relatives, so I could just go around in a circle, but I didn't expect that when I went to the relative's house to pay respects to the New Year, such a thing happened.
Point 2, how is this matter resolved?
If this had happened three years ago and 5 years ago or when I was younger, do you know how I would fix it?
I would take my parents to my relatives' house as soon as possible, or bring my relatives to my house.
Then tell them if we can solve this matter, can we sit at the table and talk about it, and see if there is a solution in the end.
If we really can't solve it, can we become the previous kinship, can we be as good as before.
I would certainly do this, because at that time I thought that I knew astronomy and geography, and I was happy to communicate and reconcile the contradictions between the families.
Although I did a lot of useless work at that time, including but not limited to conflicts between my own family and a certain relative, I took the initiative to reconcile and communicate.
But I didn't expect the other party to greet my family directly, and it was ugly to talk about.
So from that point on, I was a little skeptical about why I was clearly proactive in trying to solve this problem, why my parents told me not to be nosy.
The relatives of the other side, however, made foul remarks, and did not even care about my position or what I said, and single-mindedly pushed me out of the door.
It wasn't until later that I understood that when there were some contradictions and some conflicts, and we couldn't solve the problem from the perspective of the parties, everything was empty talk.
As one of my favorite artists said before, when you haven't experienced these things, you should never dissuade people because you haven't experienced them.
So you don't know how much suffering others have suffered, and you are even less qualified to tell them.
Forgiving relatives is a simple thing, is it that simple? Of course not.
The final solution to this matter is nothing more than that I will never go to my relatives' houses to visit the New Year in the future.
Relatives never come to our house to pay respects to the New Year, and the two sides have broken off contact, as if that's all? Yes, it really is.
The third point is the feeling that this incident gave me.
As the old saying goes, respect is mutual, and the premise of your respect for each other is that the other person respects you or the other person deserves your respect for him.
But when this external condition is not met, the so-called respect can be almost negligible.
Therefore, it is normal for there to be contradictions and conflicts between relatives, and it is normal for the two sides to look at each other unfavorably.
The key to the problem is how we deal with these contradictions, and if these contradictions are not handled well, it will be a big problem.
However, we should pay attention to the fact that in daily life, not every difficulty can be handled or needs to be dealt with.
For example, the contradictions with relatives, if they have reached a state of incompatibility between water and fire, then do not think of trying to deal with these contradictions, or try to help the other party solve the problem.
Because what you imagine is definitely not what everyone wants, when you encounter this situation, you only need to deal with it coldly, do not take the initiative to solve it, do not take the initiative to communicate, and cool down this matter.
As for whether he can still be a relative in the future, then only God knows.
So from this point of view, relatives said that they will not be used in the future, but the Strange New Year's Strange Far Away will be like this, then it can only be like this.
After all, the other party has politely refused to let us visit them, and it is really impossible to say that the hot face is pasted on the cold ass at this time.