Ask you readers, do you have people around you who like to play cards?
I have around, my dad has a card addiction, when he was working outside, he was fine, busy with work, there was no time to play cards, but, ten days in the New Year, playing cards for five days, caused Grandpa's displeasure, and grandpa was scolded.
Compared to Uncle Tang next door, my dad was fine, at least measured, and mainly entertaining. As long as Uncle Tang has time and a little money in his hand, he can't wait to go to the mahjong table, unless the family comes to the house to call for dinner, or the money in his pocket is all lost, otherwise he will not end up.
To this end, Uncle Tang's wife fought with him several times, smashed a lot of things, and the children did not want to see him.
Samuel once said, "The success of a marriage depends on two people, and one person can make it fail." ”
There is a person in the family who does not care about the feelings of others for their own happiness, such a family is difficult to be happy, not only will the spouse complain about you, feel dissatisfied with you, and even want to leave you, even the children will be angry, after all, who wants to share a parent who does not care about the family, spends money indiscriminately, and wastes time and money on the card table?
In fact, for a filial child, the parents are also their anti-scales, a existence that cannot be harmed by others, even if this person is his parent, it will anger him. If you are sorry for your spouse and let your child's father or mother be wronged, you will also make your child angry.
"Mom followed me, you follow the card," no matter how dad apologized, Dong Qian was indifferent, to pick up mom, leave dad alone in his hometown. Uncle Dong had no choice but to quickly ask for help from the people around him, hoping that everyone would say good things to him.
In the face of the crowd of onlookers, all of Dong Qian's grievances poured out, and she unceremoniously counted her father down in front of everyone.
01. When I was young, my mother had to serve my in-laws during the holidays, do housework, take me, he was on vacation, playing cards;
Uncle Dong's card addiction has been more than ten years, and when Dong Qian was very young, she was deeply impressed by the fact that her father liked to play cards.
"When I was young, my mother, like you, had to go to work to earn money, 10 hours a day, my mother was on vacation, and she had to come home as soon as possible, cook for my grandparents and me, clean up, boil water for everyone to wash, and see if I had finished my homework." What about you? Let's make an appointment before the holidays! Drill directly into people's homes and play cards until the early hours of the morning. I really don't understand, where do you get the energy? ”
"You play cards as soon as you have a chance to rest, run early in the morning, and don't come back when the meal arrives." My mother had to go door to door to find you, asked you around where you were, it was hard to find, you still refused to go, continue to play with you, my mother urged you several times, you refused to get up, and also lost a temper with my mother, saying that my mother is a disaster star, as soon as you come, you will lose. ”
"In the new year, there are more than a dozen people in the family, every day is very busy, grandparents are on the battlefield to entertain guests, you still can't find anyone, still playing cards." 」
Dong Qian's grandfather was very dissatisfied with his son's hobby of playing cards, and he also played and scolded, but he could not make Dong Qian's father quit his card addiction.
After Dong Qian grew up, she felt sorry for her mother, and she also felt that her father was playing cards inappropriately, and she persuaded her father, and her father did not tire of it, and scolded back: You stinky, your wings are hard, dare to care about your old man's business? What's wrong with my love of playing cards? I'm going to fight. ”
After Dong Qian's father retired, he neither took care of his mother who was about to turn 90, but threw the burden of taking care of his mother to his wife, nor did he do housework, nor did he maintain his health and take care of his body, still lingering at the card table, from morning to night, often working until the early morning.
02. He won money, he wanted to fight bigger, lost money, he rummaged through boxes and cabinets, and also beat my mother;
"How much money did you lose to play cards?" Sent a lot of spikes? How many times have I hit my mom? You say it to everyone! The more Dong Qian said, the more angry she became, and she couldn't care less about losing people, and she shook out all her dissatisfaction with her father.
Small gambles are pleasant, big bets hurt, Dong Qian's father is a big gamble. Once he makes money, he will increase his stakes, and he will not be willing to end up without losing.
"In the past, when Grandpa was there, he forced you to pay your wages, and only left you some money, and you took it to gamble." When you don't have enough money, you owe a debt, people go to the door to chase debts, and how many times did Grandpa hit you with a broomstick? I saw it all. You're a dad, you're not ashamed, I'm ashamed. ”
"Grandpa died, Grandma is not in good health, can't control you, you have a monthly pension of 3500, less than a week is gone, all lost at the table!" 」
"Your money has been lost, the family's expenses mainly depend on my mother, but you reach out to my mother for money, my mother does not give, how many times have you beaten my mother?" I have witnessed it with my own eyes no less than ten times. ”
After Dong Qian's father lost money, he either went back to the house to rummage through the boxes and cabinets, looking for his wife to ask for money, or he drank heavily, got drunk and then went crazy, Dong Qian's mother couldn't bear it, and had a divorce, but Dong Qian's father refused to leave with a dead face, and threatened to let her not see her daughter, Dong Qian's mother had no choice but to endure.
What kind of virtue Dong Qian's father is, in fact, everyone in the hometown knows that with Dong Qian's exposure, people around him have scolded him sentence by sentence, so that he has not been able to open his mouth.
03. The wife is hospitalized, the husband plays cards every day and does not even show his face, what is the use of such a husband?
"The wife is hospitalized for 1 week, the wife plays cards every day, you say, what is the use of such a husband?"
Dong Qian's mother, due to years of hard work, her body has long collapsed, and she fell ill some time ago and was admitted to the hospital. Dong Qian went to visit her mother, she never saw her father, no one answered the phone, she felt angry and did not call, asked someone to know the address, rushed to the place where her father played cards, and smashed the card table.
Looking at her father who wanted to do something to herself, Dong Qian made a decision, that is, to take away her mother, as for her father, go with the card for a lifetime, she can't stand it.
Dong Qian's decision was approved by her husband, and Dong Qian's father was anxious, refused to let his wife go, and fought with his daughter.
"Of course you don't want your wife to go, you're gone, play cards until the wee hours of the morning, who's going to get up and give you hot food to eat?" Who's gone, who's serving your mom? The wife is gone, who does the housework? "My mother's good friend Aunt Wang unceremoniously punctured Dong Qian's father's true thoughts."
There are also people who persuade Dong Qian's father to quit card addiction from now on, turn in his pension, be a man who takes care of the family, let Dong Qian give him another chance, and now, Dong Qian is entangled: "You say, my father may do it?" Quit your card addiction and be kind to my mom? Should I give him a chance? ”
04. If you don't take the people around you seriously, why do you ask others to take you seriously?
I think of a quote from the book I'm Divorced: "We really don't want to see young men 'do' too much and not take the people around them seriously." In the jianghu, it is inevitable that people will suffer involuntarily, but if they are not enough in judgment and concentration, it is easy to be doomed. ”
If you don't take the people around you seriously, why do you ask others to take you seriously? Fathers are kind and filial to their sons, husbands and wives are obedient, parents are not loving, they always disappoint their children, let their children suffer all grievances, and the number of disappointments of children is more, becoming desperate, and it is difficult to have any filial piety and admiration for you. If you are not qualified as a husband and cannot give your wife happiness and security, why should your wife live with you for a lifetime? Why do you want to be this little family?
In the old age, some people can enjoy the joy of heaven and live comfortably, while some people are desolate at night, and there are obviously children and grandchildren who are full of halls but no one is willing to be filial piety, for a reason. Whether it is a spouse or a child, their goodwill to you is based on the premise that you are a qualified husband and father.
Finally, I would like to say that those who do not care about their families for their own happiness, the reason why they have such confidence is also because their families are too good at talking and too weak.
There is a classic line in the movie "The Godfather": "Softness without boundaries will only make the other party inch; unprincipled benevolence will only let the other party do whatever it wants." ”
If you have your own bottom line, dare to be angry, insist on not giving in, let them be selfish, there will be no comfortable life, let them not do housework and have no food, can they still be so arrogant? You have everything done, you refuse to leave them, they can sit back and enjoy it, and naturally they have the courage and energy to do other things.
Whether it is a man or a woman, remember that the other party's progress in marriage is inseparable from your weakness and incompetence.
END.
Today's topic: Do you suggest that Dong Qian give her father another chance? Feel free to share your views in the comments section.